Getting through yesterday was a powerful thing. I felt fragile again. In hindsight, this has always been a fragile, delicate thing. Instead of saying, "I felt fragile again," it would be correct to say, "I came face to face with and acknowledged the ongoing fragility of this journey." It was kind of a disappointing experience, in that this hadn't happened in a while, and suddenly it became tough again, when perhaps I was in a "smooth sailing" type mentality. Maybe it was a needed reminder. "Smooth Sailing" is often followed by rough waters and if we're too comfy in our smooth sailing mindset, then it's easy to forget how to handle the storms. Preparing ourselves to navigate the stormy waters before the wind starts blowing is imperative to our success. I'm never beyond getting lost at sea or capsized. But like a really seasoned captain, I can have a good survival plan in place, just in case it suddenly gets rough.
Today was much better. It was incredibly busy with a full on-air/production day, followed by a private recording session for a voice-over project I've accepted, then it was straight to the YMCA, dinner out at the little Mexican place down the street from the YMCA, then home for forty-five minutes before driving to Wichita in order to pick up friends from the airport. I knew a few days ago, this was going to be a really late night.
The greatest thing about making it through yesterday? It actually strengthens the days following. Had I given in yesterday, it would have been ten times harder to get back to where I was, mentally. Recovery would have been possible, yes--but very, VERY difficult.
I'm keeping my survival plan in place and close at all times. I proved to myself I can make it through rough days with a little help from my friends.
My Tweets today:
Good morning! Sugar free hazelnut flavored non-dairy creamer. 30 cal X 2= 60 cal. pic.twitter.com/xswsipHjre
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 29, 2014
Three whole eggs prepared over-medium with fresh pineapple (7.6oz). 316 cal. pic.twitter.com/FSjG2j13OW
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 29, 2014
Bean & provolone tostadas w/mild hot sauce, jalapeños & lettuce. Ambrosia apple, fresh pineapple (5.4oz). 572 cal. pic.twitter.com/Ge6lLzPos1
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 29, 2014
Climbing aboard! #ellipticaltime pic.twitter.com/xN4nNYawEb
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 29, 2014
Chips and salsa dressing (salsa mixed with sour cream) calorie count included in following dinner tweet! pic.twitter.com/Zje3govQ4d
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 30, 2014
Look, mom- I'm eating a salad! Grilled chicken (5oz) & steak (4oz) salad with salsa dressing. W/chips&salsa. 577 cal. pic.twitter.com/h8Rl9aRJZm
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 30, 2014
Muenster cheese stick. 100 cal. pic.twitter.com/4K9SHjSFVl
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 30, 2014
Medium ambrosia apple. #lastfoodofday 80 cal. pic.twitter.com/YcBCsjzUHb
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 30, 2014
Thank you for reading and for your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
Sometimes when we are going the best is when we are the most vulnerable. I have found that out all too many times in the past. And you are so right, giving in yesterday would have made today tougher. It just makes you realize how tough it can be at times. Those hard days are the ones that show you just how far you have come. Great job Sean.
ReplyDeleteMichael, thank you so much for this. I agree 100%--when we're firing on all cylinders it's sometimes easy to overlook certain necessary perspectives. We've both come a long way, wouldn't you agree?
DeleteAbsolutely, come a long way and also had some bumpy roads and detours. But still moving forward. That's the main thing.
DeleteGlad you are feeling better today! I had a rough day today but halted the comfort food at 300 extra calories so I don't feel like I'm in a downward spiral.
ReplyDeleteNatalie, excellent!!! Putting on the brakes and staying within a reasonable distance isn't easy. That's a powerful victory!! Very nice!!
DeleteGood job in making it through, and realizing the goodness of it!!
ReplyDeleteKirtley, Thank you!! There is goodness in it, for sure. Hard to see at first--then, with a little adjustment in perspective, it becomes really clear. So grateful.
Deletecongrats on getting past that rough spot. Well done! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Gwen! :)
DeleteI remember you writing in the past about the importance of staying humble on this journey, and that's really important for all of us. Of all the really wonderful insights I've learned from you, that has been one of the most important. I have no doubt that you are stronger for having made it through yesterday. Very proud of you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteIt is crucial, Becky. Having been on both sides, I know how easy it became for me to forget that at one time, oh--I had all the answers, or so I thought. Truth is, nobody has all the answers--and I think it's because there are too many combinations of answers for each person--we're all different. Instead of answers, I'm looking at practices, habits, routines, and all of the critical elements needed to keep me on level ground as I move forward. Thank you, Becky--I'm proud of you, too!!!
Delete<<<singing "Oh! I get by with a little help from my friends!" *pats you on the back*
ReplyDeleteYes, indeed, Amy!! Thank you!!
DeleteThe fog moves in without warning and it is not easy to work/walk through. You've done it Sean, proving to us one more time "it can be done" even though it takes a lot of awareness. You are doing it!!!!
ReplyDeleteN~
Thank you, Nancy. It can move in quickly!! I'm so glad it's lifted. It's hard to see clearly in the stuff! Very challenging!!
DeleteI'm so glad you made it through the day. I've been struggling lately - and it happens so fast.
ReplyDeleteAwesome job Sean!
Hey - will you add me to your blogroll?