Wednesday, September 7, 2016

September 7th, 2016 Some Of All That

September 7th, 2016 Some Of All That

Today, I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget. I remained abstinent from refined sugar. I made my daily water goal and I remained connected with good support connections.

There will be busy days. There will be extremely stressful days. There will be emotional days. There will be cars in the shop kind of days. There will be "I must rest because I'm running on empty," kind of days. There will be panic attack kind of days. Today was some of all that. 

I'm severely behind at work. I had to delay two big things today because I simply ran out of time and energy. I was done. Couldn't be helped.

I had a dream this afternoon while taking that very necessary nap. It was the strangest dream. I found myself holding on for dear life to a high rise window seal several floors up. I'm terrified of heights. I tried my best to talk myself into staying calm--deep breaths, you're not falling, you're not falling--more deep breaths--close your eyes, and meditate this through. Now what? I had my phone on the ledge--and as my heart beat out of my chest, I reached to dial 911...

Then I woke up. My heart was pounding; I was sweating. I was so relieved it was just a dream. Or was it? Was this my brain's interpretation of what's been happening lately--or a glimpse of what could happen, a warning of sorts?

I've never been a dream interpreter kind of guy. But this one really shook me. So much so, I shared it with two support buddies--and now, with you. 

I feel better. Still experiencing some anxiety and intermittent panic attacks the likes of which I haven't experienced since early in my stand-up days.

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Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

4 comments:

  1. Sean, I sincerely believe that we are the best interpreters of our own dreams. I remember times when my high-adventure dreams found the "bad guys" catching me. It was a no-brainer when I took stock of my life and realized that I was trying to juggle too many things at once. I needed to choose what to let go of while I still could. I'm thinking that if you are not in a similar position, you will understand what that dream means to you, and deal wisely with it. God bless!

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  2. Sean, I sincerely believe that we are the best interpreters of our own dreams. I remember times when my high-adventure dreams found the "bad guys" catching me. It was a no-brainer when I took stock of my life and realized that I was trying to juggle too many things at once. I needed to choose what to let go of while I still could. I'm thinking that if you are not in a similar position, you will understand what that dream means to you, and deal wisely with it. God bless!

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  3. I too believe our dreams can be the result of our current life's experiences. I'm sure you felt like you were "hanging on for dear life," during your Mom's health crisis. Now that she is better hopefully your life will be less stressful and even your dreams will settle down. Great job of staying true to your commitment during this latest episode. It's not easy....Believe me, I understand.

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  4. The experts say (and I believe) our dreams are the subconscious trying to help us see more clearly what is going on in our lives. Have had enough dreams do that for me to agree. We are the ones to interpret how the dream connects with what is going on and sometime we are being asked to make a few changes.

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