Friday, March 31, 2017

March 31st, 2017 About Lost It

March 31st, 2017 About Lost It

I about lost it. I pulled up MyFitnessPal on my phone, the same way I do twenty times a day, and suddenly it wanted me to log in. What?? We had such a close relationship and now MFP was acting like I was a stranger. I couldn't remember my password. Instead, I chose the "log in with Facebook" option. Okay--I'm back in... but wait...where's my data??? Where are the entries for today?---oh wait...what about the last three years??? And what's this "has logged in for 1 days in a row business?" I frantically emailed support. No friends, no streak, no data...Finally, and thankfully, I figured it out. I had accidentally logged into an old abandon MFP account of mine from long ago. There was one single solitary friend request long left unanswered and little else. I accepted the friend request (I have no idea why)--and now that person is all alone, perusing an abandoned profile. If it's you, come over to my active account! I logged out of that neglected account and logged into my SeanAAnderson account--and everything was fine again.

I didn't realize how much MFP meant to me. The history, the streak--the bigger part of what it represents to me, the connections--all of it was gone for ten minutes (so I thought)-and I put everything on hold. Not a single step in any direction could happen until I figured it out. I'm so glad it worked out well. I just hope the MFP support person on the receiving end of my desperate plea doesn't hold me to the line: "If you can fix this I'll upgrade to premium right away!" I mean, nothing needed fixing. I just needed the right account. I don't mind the pop-up ads.

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, I stayed well connected with solid support, and I enjoyed a Friday night workout at the gym.

I canceled my trip to the Oklahoma Association of Broadcasters conference today. I simply couldn't do it. Leaving for that trip again today would have required dropping several other balls. I'm not the best juggler as it is. I opted to stay at the studio and get stuff done.

Today's Accountability Tweets:
































Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Thursday, March 30, 2017

March 30th, 2017 Join Me In That

March 30th, 2017 Join Me In That

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed connected with great support.

Today involved some travel for work. Home way too late! Almost Tweets only, tonight.

#TBT Before Picture:
 photo l_6ed5279928b8b743c301f6beb6c282c6.jpg

Don't give up. The travel time between feeling a million miles away and feeling a groove that's uniquely you and bringing confident, positive progress can be very very short. The difference is often separated by a few degrees of perspective. Don't give up.

I'm not. Join me in that, please. :)

Today's Accountability Tweets:




























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

March 29th, 2017 Not A Failure

March 29th, 2017 Not A Failure

I'm behind on most everything. I'm behind on emails, messages, work projects, and my latest podcast episode, among a few other things. I realized today how much stress and anxiety I create when I focus on what I can't do in this moment, instead of what I can do in this moment. Doesn't that describe most of what can hold us back from just about anything? 

The truth is: This is a very short, temporary thing--The weather coverage didn't help the situation, of course--but this busy time will level off very soon and things will calm. The self-imposed thoughts of "failure" aren't true. I'm not a failure.

The changeover at work is going well. The more I learn, the more I'm comfortable with the changes. It's comforting to know we'll have strong support long after the factory reps leave on Friday.

I'm super-tired. I'm cutting tonight's edition short. I had a good visit with mom tonight before heading back home.

Oh--by the way-- cloud bread... Heard of it? A friend of mine made some today and shared it with me. I requested exact ingredients and amounts used--and oh my-- these little, non-bread, no carb, no sugar "puffs" are fantastic. Three eggs, three tablespoons 1/3 less fat cream cheese, and 1/4 teaspoon cream of tarter--that's it...it makes twelve. I don't know how she made it--but those are the ingredients, divided by twelve cloud bread minis-- 26 calories each.

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed connected with excellent support.

Today's Accountability Tweets:






























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

March 28th, 2017 Firm Grip

March 28th, 2017 Firm Grip

I've done well in recognizing my limits and drawing lines where I must in order to protect me and my plan. Sometimes it means bringing things down to the simplest of terms; a minimum set of requirements for the day. That's what today required.

I was at work by 6am, left at 11am to get mom to her doctor's appointment, back at work by 1pm, left at almost 5pm--then was back by 7pm for weather coverage until 11:30pm. It's midnight. And it starts again at 4:30am. Actually, I think I'll set the alarm for 5am. I might need that extra 30 minutes.

I had to do miss my Tuesday night weight loss support group teleconference call tonight. I do not like doing that-- but I hadn't a choice with the weather situation, and fortunately, Coach Kathleen covered. She and I can do that for each other when needed. It works out well.

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I made it important to stay connected with good support.

The schedule should start easing some in the coming days. In the meantime, I'll ride it with a firm grip.

Today's Accountability Tweets:
Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Monday, March 27, 2017

March 27th, 2017 Most Things

March 27th, 2017 Most Things

I haven't been managing my calorie budget well. I should never have nearly 400 left at the end of the day. But lately, for a variety of reasons, it seems difficult to hit certain marks throughout the day. The optimal level for me is somewhere between 1500 and 1600 before dinner. That gives a reasonable dinner amount and leaves a normal amount of calorie for some fruit as I write this blog.

With over 400 calories left, I concocted a crazy combination tonight--that I'll admit, was a little much this time of night. It was refined sugar-free--yes...it was within my calorie budget--yes, but still, I feel overly full from it--and I don't like that feeling. I suppose it conjures up memories. I think, from now on--when I have too many calories left, I'll just leave them on the table. I'll eat a reasonable, normal amount of fruit--and call it good. If I want to prevent going too far under budget, then I'll need to plan better throughout the day.

Anyway-- nice "problems" to have, I know. And it isn't about any one food item really--to me, it's more about a rhythm and style of eating--and breaking that rhythm even while maintaining plan boundaries, can eventually break the plan.

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded today's water goal, and I stayed well connected with support.

The schedule is still nuts and will be the rest of this week. I'm hoping our threat of severe weather tomorrow diminishes quickly. But as it stands, it's there.

I take mom to the doctor tomorrow. It'll be a fast back and forth midday trip because tomorrow is also the day we transition to all new hardware and software at the studio.

I'm handling the stress a little better than expected. It's going to be a wonderful thing. It'll simply take time for adjustment. Isn't that true for most things?

Today's Accountability Tweets:






























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Sunday, March 26, 2017

March 26th, 2017 In The Can

March 26th, 2017 In The Can

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with support.

The schedule today started early at the studio--had a break in the middle--then ended late. I just got home from on-air weather coverage. I planned on writing a little more tonight--but I'll catch up next time.

By the way, episode 15 of Transformation Planet is coming soon. It's "in the can" as we say in the broadcasting world. Heather Robertson from Half Size Me is my special guest! I haven't had the time needed for production! But it's coming, for sure!

Goodnight. I'm hitting the pillow! 

Today's Accountability Tweets:




























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Saturday, March 25, 2017

March 25th, 2017 Emcee

March 25th, 2017 Emcee

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded today's water goal, I stayed connected with support--and I had plenty of natural exercise!

I was the emcee tonight at a special fundraiser for the autism center.
































I did this event last year. Below is a 2016/2017 comparison--and without checking, I'm fairly certain it's within a few pounds. I'm very proud of maintaining. And truly, it's much more than a reflection of size/weight. It's a reflection of maintaining the integrity of a plan each day and absolutely giving it the highest importance level. One day at a time. Those days add up!


























































This wasn't tonight. I just ran across an old stand-up performance photo--and it reminded me how much I miss doing stand-up. I must find a way to occasionally work in a set somewhere!!!

Tomorrow starts early--it's back to the studio to continue this hardware/software transition. I'll be sure to pack the food I need--and I may run into the store on the way to grab a few things I might need.

Today's Accountability Tweets:
































Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Friday, March 24, 2017

March 24th, 2017 Not Lost On Me

March 24th, 2017 Not Lost On Me

The stress level has been set to the high position. We're changing software and hardware at the studios--and we're going on-line with it as early as Sunday evening. The goal is for the listener not to really notice the switch--it's behind the scenes stuff, but believe me, it takes a bunch of work on the entire team. I suppose I'm not feeling as confident as I need to feel with these challenges. We have great support direct from the manufacturer--they're actually in-studio with us, to help--and full support for the software on the phone, anytime--so, now it's up to me to alleviate my stress by asking lots and lots of questions and paying close attention to the answers. Learning new things can be stressful if I try to figure it out on my own. Good thing we don't have to figure it all out on our own. The parallels between this and other very important things in my life are not lost on me.

I'll be spending a number of hours working on the transition at the studio this weekend.

Today was another long and involved day. Aside from the morning show and normal production responsibilities, I worked a four hour/two station location broadcast until 5pm. I ran a few errands afterward--and by the time I made it home, a nap was in order. I was simply spent. My voice was wrecked from thirty-two approximately 3 minutes each on-air breaks.

Dinner was late--and it was okay by me. I typically don't go this long between meals, like I did between lunch and dinner because it isn't necessarily a good thing for my food plan. Part of the plan is keeping a somewhat consistent schedule and steady pacing. Today was an exception, not a rule.

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded today's water goal, and I stayed well connected with exceptional support, including a very nice conversation tonight.

Oh--and about the stress-- For me, when it combines with tiredness, that's when I'm most vulnerable. In fact--it was just the other day when, after a prayer and some holy moly, I'm feeling super unstable feelings--I called Gerri in the middle of these tilted food thoughts--and after a few minutes of speaking, I was okay--and I could carry on, on-plan. But yes--of course those thoughts come. The difference is, I'm not relying solely on me to resist the temptation of those wonky thoughts that do their best to convince me a binge might alleviate the stress or somehow fix my tiredness. If I tried to rely 100% on me, I'd be 500 pounds or more right now because I don't have willpower. It isn't willpower that keeps me well, I assure you.

A binge never alleviated stress in my life. A binge might have distracted me from many stressful situations for as long as it took to plow through the food, but the stress was always waiting for after the last bite. And a binge never rejuvenated or restored me to a well-rested state.  

Today's Accountability Tweets:






























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Thursday, March 23, 2017

March 23rd, 2017 Reframe It

March 23rd, 2017 Reframe It

Today was a long one. It's days like today when I must have a plan in place. Actually--check that, I must have a plan in place each and every day--but especially when the schedule is challenging. I did have a plan and I followed it well.

I had the pleasure and benefit of some powerful support interactions, too. The direction of the support exchange doesn't matter, both parties benefit every single time. It sure helped me today. If you ever entertain the thought "I don't want to reach out for support because I don't want to bother anyone," try your best to reframe it.

For one, please don't assume what the other person is doing on the receiving end. And don't take it personally if the reply is delayed. The most powerful part of a support call or text--happens when the message is sent. The act of sharing with another human exactly where you are at any particular moment changes things. Suddenly, those wild thoughts don't live exclusively in your head. 

But the biggest reframe in my opinion: When you reach for support, you're giving the receiver an opportunity to help someone--and in that, you're essentially extending a feel-good gift, because who doesn't feel great when they're able to help someone? Not reaching out for support denies them the opportunity to help.  

Mom's doctor appointment went well. It was her last appointment with her primary care doctor of 20 years. She's switched to a new doctor who's in charge where she lives. We didn't get back until almost 9pm--and we were surprised to see her new doctor making rounds. He stopped by to check on mom and we were able to give him the details of today's visit.

We dined out at one of our old favorites tonight. And mom was able to do some clothes shopping.

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with wonderful support.

Today's Accountability Tweets:




























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

March 22nd, 2017 What I've Been Told And Shown

March 22nd, 2017 What I've Been Told And Shown

Running into people whom I haven't seen in years, is sometimes fun. This happened (again) today. After giving me one look, "You're still doing well on your diet" fell out of her mouth accompanied by a surprised expression. I didn't explain anything. I simply said "yes, every day." 

I cringe a little at the word "diet"--because, I'm not on a diet--and haven't been. See this recent blog post for a more in-depth explanation of that one. But I get it and it's fine. This happens quite a bit actually--these interactions, recently in fact--the whole "You're still skinny" thing. Anyone can call it anything they like, because I know what it's been.

It's been a miracle.

Most people don't make it back. I'm here. And considering where I was and how quickly I got back there...yeah, it's an absolute miracle for me to be here, now. I give thanks for this blessing each day, right before I start doing what I've been told and shown works, by others who've traveled this road long before me.  

I don't know it all. I don't have all the answers for anybody, including me. But I can learn and I can watch and I can study what others do and I can stop talking long enough to listen and I can read between the lines and I can be honest with myself long enough to function in reality instead of some alternate perception created in my own head for the specific purpose of releasing me from the responsibility of taking extraordinary care of me. And somehow, this miraculous thing gets done, one day at a time--it gets done.  It's not impossible for me.

It's not impossible for you.

I can do this.

You can do this.

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, remained refined sugar-free, exceeded my daily water goal, stayed closely connected to awesome support, and enjoyed a great workout at the YMCA. It was a good day.

I visited with mom this evening before my Y trip. She's doing better as indicated by a few things, namely her blood oxygen reading after forgetting to put the oxygen tube back on after a restroom trip. Thirty minutes later and she was still in the mid 90's. I'll pick up mom tomorrow afternoon, right after work, for a trip to her doctor in Stillwater. It'll likely be her last visit with her primary care doc there--considering she has a new doctor here. She's looking forward to getting out and about!

Today's Accountability Tweets:










































Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

March 21st, 2017 Same Thing

March 21st, 2017 Same Thing

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with great support.

I woke with a horrible pain in the neck. I slept on it wrong, stress, who knows?? I limped through my show and immediately left right after, made it back home to apply heat and take ibuprofen. This happened a few weeks ago--or maybe a month or so...same thing, same place--same pain. I did feel better by noon, just in time to get back to work and get some things done.

I reached for some key support today. Reaching out for support is just as important to me as maintaining the integrity of my food plan. It's a daily thing.

I'm feeling much better tonight. The neck isn't hurting--I've had a good food day, a fantastic support day, and I have what I need for a good tomorrow.

Today's Accountability Tweets:


























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean