Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Day 843-853 Better Sleep on The Way, Still Some Weight To Lose, and Another Speaking Engagement

Day 843-853

Better Sleep on The Way, Still Some Weight To Lose, and Another Speaking Engagement

I've been struggling with the effects of sleep apnea so much lately, I just feel wrecked half the time. The results of my sleep study on the night of December 30th require another sleep lab, this time with a cpap machine. I go in Thursday night for round two! They'll adjust the settings, find the perfect pressure, and I'll start feeling rested again! I think I'm finally over the stubbornness I've felt in accepting my post-weight loss sleep apnea problems. Yes--I thought my weight loss had totally liberated me from that disorder, and NO, it didn't. So I have a choice--I can be a big baby about it or I can count my blessings and realize how wonderfully lucky I've been along this road. I've discovered a new life of possibilities free from morbid obesity. So--a sleep disorder, easily treated with a life saving device? No problem. I had a cpap before and I slept wonderfully for years, despite my 500 pound body. It's time to feel rested at 229 or whatever I am now.

I haven't weighed in over four weeks. I must do it again real soon! I'll tell you this--I kind of feel like I may have gained a pound or two. Some of the pictures from my Lose To Win speaking engagement on the 13th, were less than flattering. You'll see. Oh--I'm so hard on myself, because really--compared to where I've been, it's all good. But the jeans I chose that night--I didn't like the fit. Now--when I say that I still have work to do--The people that send me messages telling me I don't, might agree. Some of it is the loose skin factor, but seriously---honestly--I could stand to lose another 15 pounds at least. Maybe even 20. Not necessarily in my upper body, but absolutely in my lower. The pictures will show. And the video that's coming will too. I swear--I'm not crazy or obsessed, my friend!! I'm just brutally honest with myself when it comes to these issues. I'm also very comfortable and confident, and that's something I've never experienced, ever--before now.

I'm eating around 1800 calories per day. Some days less, others a little more. It's a very relaxed approach. I still haven't revved up my workouts. Wow--that's been a running theme on this blog, huh? After 853 days, I'm still talking about needing to "amp up" my workouts. I hope that you realize, my example in the workout department isn't and never has been the best. There are friends of mine that know how to workout good and hard. I could learn a thing or two from you! And YOU know who you are!!

My life feels chaotic sometimes--as I try to juggle a full time job, write/finish this manuscript, and struggle with severe sleep deprivation because of the apnea. But we're getting there--slowly, but surely.

Communicating my story and weight loss methods/philosophy is certainly a passion. I can clearly see how this will be my future in every way. I can't think of a better future. The feedback I get from people who are discovering the power within to transform, is over the top--and it feels amazing to be involved in some small way.

The speaking engagement on the 13th was well received. I certainly feel like I communicated effectively. The main focus was all about getting very real and honest with ourselves and then throwing away the rule book--simplifying the process, and focusing on the right battle. I had a tremendous time and the comments after were wonderful! Big thanks to Gayle Williams of Womyn Aloud Productions for producing the opening segment and running the presentation on the big screen! And big thanks to David and Crystal Deken from Deke Media for the video production work!! The video will be available soon. You can visit Deke Media at

Beverly said-- Thank YOU Sean! You're such an inspiration and your talk was so appreciated. I hope everyone else took as much with them tonight as I did about not making this so hard.

Cathy said-- Sean, you were amazing!!! Your message was profound and I know so many are going to benefit from your personal story and your Transformation Road!!!

Barbara said--You were great tonight (as usual) Sean! I so enjoyed it and got a lot of motivation from it! I have started reading your blog from day one and read about 3 or 4 days each day. Also if I get to thinking about eating more then what I have on deposit in the bank, I pull up your blog and read one or two days and I'm good to go again! Thanks for helping all of us to "Transformation Road"!!!!

I traveled back in time to January of 2009 and found a nice excerpt from Day 130:

This journey is often times more mental workouts than physical ones. It is a mindset, it is a decision, and the rewards are the good consequences of those decisions. I was always too busy coming up with excuses for why I couldn't do this. But you know what? Once you really decide to do it 100%, the excuses lose their power completely. If you're facing this same struggle then embrace yourself and decide to live! Because this is living my friend. I may still be slightly over 400 pounds, but I can move again! I can go to Wal-Mart and walk the entire store with a positive-effortless stride instead of a labored waddle. I can breathe again, I can hurry if I need to, I can do things that 100 pounds ago was completely unthinkable. When the results are that dramatic, it makes you want more. I have no idea what I'll feel like a hundred pounds lighter from now, but if it's as dramatic a change as the first hundred, then I can't wait!

Here we are, two years later--and yes, I know exactly what it feels like to lose the next 100 and then another 76 on top of that---It feels AMAZING! It's cool for me to go back and see how wonderful I felt--even at over 400 pounds. The road has been a joy for different reasons along the way. And it's been a struggle for other reasons. But in all--It's been one incredible ride. "When the results are that dramatic, it makes you want more." That is so true!! The results snowball effect!! Good choices lead to more good choices--and the results come with that consistent pursuit.

It's time to check the mailbag and feature a few wonderful messages! I sincerely appreciate every message and I absolutely LOVE updates on your personal success!! Let me know how you're doing!

Hi Sean! Just a note to say I LOVE your blog! Thank you for sharing your journey, and all the inspiration. An amazing journey. I just started my own weight loss journey on 1/1/11 and looking for friends to inspire and be inspired by. I hope you come by and visit my blog, and wishing you luck in everything you do! Hugs, Wendy Check out Wendy's blog at:

Keep it up, you are right we need to inspire and empower people around us and influence them to what we have seen and experienced I have lost 50lbs in about 2 yrs and it feels awesome but reading your blogs keeps one in check. Thanks--Sam

Hello Sean, How are you? My name is Faye. My husband and I live in a suburb near Philadelphia, Pennsylvania! I WAS following your daily posts for a while, and then stopped. I'm BACK now and REALLY serious this time to lose this weight! I am now at 282, and SOOOOOOOOOOOOO EMBARRASSED to even type that number! I was wondering how do I figure out how many calories I should be eating to lose this weight??? I will be 59 in June and I have family in Rochester New York, my husband and I travel there in June to visit my brother and his wife and my niece and her husband and young son! I HAVE MADE A PROMISE to myself that I want to BE THINNER the next time we go! I SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LOVE reading your posts and your pics are just unbelievable! YOU LOOK AMAZING! I KNOW you are so busy with all your posts and blogs and face book (I didn't check Facebook out yet, but will tonight) BUT, I am hoping you could give me an idea on calories! My neighbor and I are doing this together and she gave me the web site of Lance Armstrong site It states that I should be eating 1870 calories a day. Today is my 3rd day and I HATE to write what I eat, (its one of the reasons I didn't sign back up to weight watchers) BUT NOW I'M SO HAPPY TO SAY THAT I, YAY, AM TRACKING EVERYTHING and looking up calories too! I HAVE been a HUGE water drinker from way back and just got away from it some. I have been drinking a little over a half gallon every day, sometimes MORE! SO SORRY TO HAVE KEPT YOU SO LONG HERE AND OH, ONE MORE THING, YOUR FAMILY LOOKS SO NICE! ESPECIALLY YOUR MOM AND GRAND MOM! MINE ARE BOTH in Heaven! Many thanks in advance--Faye

Hi Sean, I am writing to let you know what your blog has done for me. Going back, I am 65 and had gotten a good scare with my Blood Pressure ( I am on meds already) and it wasn't coming back down. I had read your article and then signed on to your blog. Your blog has supported me as I kept a diary on line and measured portions and started the Exercise program SIT AND BE FIT on PBS which is a simple, easy going workout. So, over the last 6 months I have gotten healthier (and that's my goal), lost 27 pounds, and am feeling wonderful. Oh, and my BP is the lowest I have had in years. When I see my internist we will be discussing the amt. of meds I need now. My clothes fit comfortably and my energy level is up. I also don't mind having my picture taken either. I plan on living a good, long time and seeing my grandchildren grow up! Thank you for your continued blog articles and I go back and look at earlier diary entries too, and it really IS interesting! Keep on, keeping on!!! --Rosie

Hey there Sean, Wow...I started reading your blog and I found myself just in tears...reading about what you went through. Just letting you know and you probably hear this all the time but your honesty is so appreciated. I have to admit I read about you having to find a scale and that whole job made me cry. I just wanted to give you a great big hug. You are a brave soul to share this and having struggled with weight loss it hit a nerve. --Julie

Dave May, who works across the hall from me every morning on KLOR, has started his own blog. It's not a weight loss blog, but it's certainly interesting! His resolution for 2011 is to say nothing negative about anyone ever, for one year solid! How will this effect his life? How will it effect his family? How will it change him personally? Read and find out! He's recruited a pastor, a mental health professional, and an English professor to act as an "expert" panel throughout his journey to less negativity. You can read his interesting blog at

Thank you for reading! Goodnight and...

Good Choices,

On stage during the Lose To Win speaking engagement.

Another stage picture...

After interview--for the video

Recent--In studio Thank you Cathy Cole!

Today--George Harrison's sister Louise stopped by the show and had lunch with radio station staff and listeners at Mazzios. She looks so much like George, wow!! She was in town promoting an upcoming concert at the Poncan Theatre--Liverpool Legends will be on the Poncan Theatre Stage January 28th at 7:30pm--sponsored by RCB Bank and KLOR!

Huge before picture--alongside Amber, Courtney, and Irene

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Day 836-842 Planning To Reach For More, My Cheesy Speaking Engagement, and More "Lost" Before Shots

Day 836-842

Planning To Reach For More, My Cheesy Speaking Engagement, and More "Lost" Before Shots

I know a stated goal is important, but I must admit something I've experienced since hitting 230: If I'm not careful, I could easily forget that there's still work to be done. I understand that maintaining and losing are two different things, yet very similar. I feel like, eating normal portions, like a normal person, is so automatic now. But what isn't, is setting and committing to a solid workout schedule. I've always stated that redefining my relationship with food--in effect, overcoming a lifetime of food addiction, is my strong point. I'm still and always will be a food addict. But my comfort level with food, my friendship, if you will, is solid. However, with that understood, it's important for me to realize that the exercise part is even more critical now, if I plan to reach further and go beyond where I am physically. I do plan to reach further.

I want that body I've always dreamed of having, and I'm in a perfect position to get exactly what I want. I've stripped myself of the fat shell that I allowed to hold me back for so long and now the canvas is ready for a new picture. I thought about this as I worked out today. The mountain of 276 pounds is gone, and now it's time to fine tune, it's time to dream a little more, do a little more, make it happen again--in other ways.

Melody Knight Young, along with several Ponca Citians, are NYC marathon runners and facebook friends of mine. Melody recently posted to my wall: "So, are you ready to run the half marathon in OKC?" My reply: "That would be amazing. I have a looong way to go before I'm ready for that, I swear. OK--Maybe not that long of a ways...but still, a ways. ;)"

And it's so true. I do have a long ways to go. But it's not impossible. Anything is possible, if I decide to put in the effort needed to achieve. Don't count me out Melody, ever!

I played racquetball with the wall today, just like in the video from my last post. Well, nothing like the video in my last post, really. This time, at 229 pounds, I was flying around that court. I'm training in the court once again. Why? Aside from the fact that it's a phenomenal workout--The owner of the broadcasting company where I work, has challenged me to another racquetball match soon--and he's going to be very surprised at my abilities. Just remember Bill--inside that court, you're not my're just my next challenger, about to go down!

On Thursday, I had an opportunity to speak at the Lose To Win kick-off event for the third year in a row. It was wonderful! I used 276 pounds of Velveeta to illustrate how much weight I've lost. I even put on my old size 64's and a 6XL "Big Daddy" jersey shirt for my entrance. I had to have two assistants, one on each side, to hold up my pants as I pushed the cart full of Velveeta. It was crazy fun. Those pants---wow, I still can't believe that they were tight when I first bought them. I shared the story of how the button actually popped off and I had to have another sewn on, about an inch over--just to wear them again, they were the only pair of jeans I had at one point. My talk was about how this Lose To Win Challenge can be whatever you desire. It can simply be an eight week contest or it can be life changing forever. If you choose the latter, win the money or not, you'll be winning for the rest of your life! It was a fun speaking engagement and a nice teaser for my upcoming Lose To Win seminar on Thursday January 13th inside the historic Poncan Theatre.

I invited people to come up and share how much they desired to lose---and then, they lifted that amount of Velveeta. I encouraged, "go ahead, walk around with it a little," and then watched as they felt the relief of putting the weight back on the stack. It was a wonderful visual aid and an interesting invitation that many accepted.

I sincerely appreciate all of the wonderful emails and messages sent my way. Thank you! I can't share them all (although I wish I could), but I will share a few--with first names only, in consideration of their privacy. It's messages like these that make me feel on top of the world. All of the work has been worth every drop of sweat, every hour at the keyboard, every personal story shared...worth it, completely:

"Hey Sean, My name is Shirley. I just wanted to say I am so proud of all your
success. I started following your blog after I read your AOL story in
August. What you said made so much sense! Since I stared following I am down 22 lbs and my cholesterol is down 50 points!! Have a wonderful year:)"

"Dear Sean, I started reading your blogs in July and you helped me more than you can know! I am back making better food choices and losing weight. Have another 100 pounds to go but know I can make it with the help of the blogs. Through your blog friends (I was not even aware of blogs before yours) I have made it day to day. Hope you won't let as much time pass in between your blogging as you have had to do recently. Am looking forward to your book coming out. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!!! NANCY"

"Hi Sean, Its been almost three months since I originally email you. I am so excited and I wanted to email you again with an update. I have reached my original goal to loose 50 lbs! Thank you so much for being so inspirational! I continue to follow your blogs plus your posts on facebook and enjoy them so. I have looked at pictures of myself and can't believe the difference of 50 lbs and imagine how you feel with all that you have lost. I do have days that I still see myself as the fatter me, but as you mentioned in many of your blogs it's our mind and a mental thing that I need to overcome. I can't thank you enough for being who you are and helping so many people like myself. If I didn't read you blog I don't think I would be at the weight I am today. I plan to continue to loose and the next goal is 25 more but I am so pleased to make it this far and will continue on. I am the healthiest and happiest I have been in 25 years and I feel wonderful! And Size 12 feels fabulous! Thank you again for being so inspirational. Patti"

Virginia writes:
"Hi Sean, sorry for my bad English, but I read from Italy (Florence).
I met you first on your blog and then on facebook. You're such inspirational for my weight loss journey! I'd like to know if your radio station is also on internet,I'd like to hear how sounds your voice :)). I'm tryng to learn English watching movies and hearing English voices....I'd like to come to Pine Ridge reservation ( I love Native American culture) next summer and I'd like to speak an acceptable English. SO... that's it. Good Life, ciao"

I'm so happy for these wonderful people and everyone that shares their story with me!! Thank you so much! I just keep thinking about how your inspiration multiplies exponentially...Because with your success, you're inspiring others around you to do the same--and it keeps going and going!! We can make a difference, my friend!

I traveled back two years into the archives today, visiting January 2009. I found a couple of excerpts I wanted to share:

I constantly have to keep myself ahead of that “line of least resistance.” It's too easy to just not do this. The line of least resistance is what put me up over 500 pounds for so long. The line of least resistance has an all you cant eat buffet, where you never worry about calories. It has comfy sofas and beds, and not a treadmill anywhere remotely close. Every comfort and indulgence is readily available at that line. But it's not free. It cost you dearly. It takes away so much from your life while pretending to be your best friend. So is staying away from that line effortless? No, not even a little bit. But is it worth the effort? Absolutely. Because the rewards of getting healthy and losing weight gives me more than any false friendship that line provides. It's real positive stuff my friend. I can't imagine the potential yet. It's too far reaching to calculate. And the cost of success? Exercise and learning how to limit portions. And I still get to rest when I need to, and I still get to eat whatever I want, I still get to enjoy myself. Moving this body and eating less is a small price to pay for all the rewards it can bring.

From a different day, two years ago--speaking of smaller clothes:

I'm finally on the final hole of that belt I've written about before. When I first started this journey that belt was a good two to three inches from going all the way around me. Then I tried it one day and was able to use the very first hole. I remember what a victory that was. And now I'm down to the very last hole position. This belt is about ready to be retired! What a fantastic way to track progress, hole by hole! It's amazing how good this makes me feel. When I first bought that belt a year and a half ago. I really needed a belt and a few other items, so we drove all the way to Tulsa to the big and tall store. I bought a leather belt two-pack in the largest size they carried and when I tried it on it didn't even come close to fitting. I knew before I even tried that there was no way it would work. Lucky for me the other was a stretchable woven leather design and even though it was technically the same size as the first belt, I was able to stretch it to barely fit. So the little belt made it's way into the closet with the only hope of rescue resting on the possibility that I would someday lose enough weight to use it. I'm on the last hole of that little belt now baby! I get really excited sometimes! You can always tell because my use of exclamation points go through the roof!!!!

This is what it feels like to take a successful stand. Losing weight is such a rewarding experience with so many little victories along the way to that ultimate goal. It seems that I'm celebrating something new all the time. In fact, I think it's time for another Levi's shopping trip to Oklahoma City. I'm going to go for 48's this time. In case you're keeping track, that would be 14 sizes below my largest! I also need some smaller shirts and smaller everything else. There's nothing in my closet I can't wear now. The “someday I'll be able to wear that” items used to outnumber the big stuff two to one. I haven't really thought about buying new clothes just yet because I've still got a ways to go and I don't want to buy new stuff and then be too little for them in a month or two. But I'm going to have to buy some along the way, that's all there is to it! Clothes shopping was always a dreaded idea for me as long as I can remember. Now I look forward to the trip.

My dear Aunt Kelli has once again, uncovered some "lost" before photos that have just left me with my mouth hanging open. I'll write a caption below the one that really got to me recently. I never realized that I looked THAT big. Wow. Thank you Kelli!

And thank you for reading, giving me your support, and sharing your success with me! I want to hear about what you're experiencing! If you haven't already--Please, friend me on facebook!! You can search for me on facebook by using my email address
I've been horrible about updating my Twitter account. I swear--It's as easy as sending a text, but I can't seem to get in the habit. I'll work on that, deal?

Again--thank you for reading. Goodnight and...

Good Choices,

The Lose To Win 2011 kick-off was at the new YMCA!

That's a bunch of Velveeta!

Oh my---yeah---This is a big before--but it's not the one that made me wince...this is:
I never realized I looked this big. Isn't that strange? How--despite mirrors, pictures, or reflections in windows--our image in our mind is most always better than reality? This picture really shocked me...and I have some pretty big before pictures. I can see that mom has lost a bunch of weight since, too!! Really--Go look at yourself now, momma!! We were both at our heaviest in this picture!!

Family photo. Irene and the girls. Oh, how I worried them--but I always tried to distract them with humor...thinking they wouldn't worry as much if they were laughing. They really weren't laughing too much inside---always worrying about me...They tell me, it was a constant.

With Amber on her 21st Birthday!!
With KL (Amber's boyfriend), Uncle Keith, and Amber--at her 21st birthday dinner!

With grandma and mom. I love these ladies!!!!

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Day 827-835 Farewell 2010--You Were Incredible To Me, Plus Videos and Pictures!

Day 827-835

Farewell 2010--You Were Incredible To Me, Plus Videos and Pictures!

2010 turned out to be an amazing year, indeed. I look back on everything that has happened and I feel a mixture of emotions. The good far outweighs the bad, but it isn't the "bad" that necessarily brings out a slight sadness. It's changes. So many changes, I lost count at some point. I just watched the video of me playing racquetball after losing just over 100 pounds and my bottom lip started to quiver with emotion. There I was, nearly 400 pounds at that point, and I was feeling better than ever. That was me. It's still me in many ways. When I watch that long and somewhat boring video--it's like looking at the old Sean, the Sean that's gone forever. Is that strange? To kind of, well, "mourn" the loss of the person I was? Even though the man I've become is far better off in numerous ways? I sometimes get too introspective for my own good, I think. But you know what? It really is all good. Being a normal size is a dream come true. Hitting a goal that I sometimes thought was unattainable, that, my friend---makes the entire year a shining success.

I'm forever changed in so many ways. It's like wearing a seat belt in the car. I automatically do it every time now, I buckle up with an effortless motion. At over five hundred pounds, I never put on a seat belt, ever. Most of the time, it simply wouldn't fit. Other times, the effort required was more than I cared to invest, even at the extreme cost of my personal safety. Many of the changes I've experienced, have become automatic--just like wearing that seat belt every time. And that feels very good.

Christmas 2010 was my third Christmas along this road. It was very strange to not have Amber with us (she opted to stay with her boyfriends family--and come home after Christmas), and having Christmas dinner with my girlfriend Karen AND Irene and her boyfriend Allen, was---well---slightly awkward. (If you asked Karen and Allen--probably Extremely Awkward!) We were all guest at my mom's place in Stillwater. As strange as that might sound to some, it isn't really. Irene and I have no ill will toward each other, we get along fine. It's a mutual understanding that divorce doesn't mean we're enemies. We have two beautiful daughters, who need two parents, like they've always had...and they still have that...we just live different lives in different households. It's about love, forgiveness, understanding, and a respectful consideration for each other. Let's talk about something else---because I'm walking that thin line of being too personal here...something I've done many times throughout this journey...But I don't necessarily regret that...It's that kind of transparency that has made this blog what it is today. It's a very real account of a consistent, positive effort--out of the trappings of morbid obesity, and into a new way of life on many different levels...and I'm proud of what it has meant to me and the opportunities it has provided.

Someone once asked me if I get paid from this blog, and if not, why do I put so much time and effort into these writings? (Keep in mind--the archives have nearly two years worth of daily post--nothing like the sporadic posting schedule of today) My answer to them was "no, I don't get paid." But that wasn't really true. It may not have provided a paycheck, but it has given me something far more valuable. Every time someone sends me a message telling me how these writings have helped them--that's my pay...and trust me, it feels so incredible to cash those "checks." And eventually, through books, speaking engagements, and other projects--I plan on making this world of weight loss, my career. It's my passion. I must!! So--no, I don't get paid to write this blog, but it's blessed me in many ways far beyond a paycheck.

My sleep lab study was horrible. It was easily the worst night I've had in a very long time. The good news is, I'll be getting the results soon---and with those results, a new CPAP and plan to be well rested in the coming year. I must be well rested--because we have lots to do!!

I'm looking forward to 2011. Oh my--I'm really looking forward to this So many wonderful updates to come along the way, and I'll report them all right here. I sincerely thank you for reading and for giving me your support!

Instead of writing about some of the highlights from 2010, let's take a visual tour---below you'll find some video and pictures from a most amazing 2010. Thank you for reading. Goodnight and...

Good Choices,

The sleep study. Very happy about getting this done...I needed it, big time!

With Courtney on Christmas Day

Dressed to brave the frigid temps for the Annual Anderson Family Christmas Day 5K! (it was just two of us Anderson men heading out there...and we were the ONLY PEOPLE on the lake. We couldn't believe it! It wasn't THAT cold. In this entire city, not one other soul was out on that trail...It was very strange. The other people were probably out there when the sun was shining---we waited until the temps chilled into the 20's with nightfall.

Something rare here---me wearing a hat. I'm not a hat person--but it was very important to wear one for this 5K--My ears thanked me for the warmth.

With Courtney and mom

My dear sweet mother! I love her!!

With my Aunt Kelli, Uncle Keith, Mom, and grandma

The freedom to fit on and ride a water craft like this---wow, it's one of the greatest feelings along this road.

I was still nearly 400 pounds's very strange for me to watch this video...very.

Right before getting the "505" tattoo--Having second thoughts...

Getting the "505" tattoo.

The 2010 Lose To Win kick-off speaking engagement. I was so afraid I would crash on that bike. The door opening I rode through was a tight fit---and the floor was really could have been bad!!! ;) Choose change before change chooses you! Good times, indeed. And OK---the funeral at the start was dramatic--but seriously--that's exactly where I was headed...and it fit with my over-all theme.

This was from 2009--but I love this video---from after the YMCA Turkey Trot 10K---and seriously--If I can do it...You can too. Love it.

Big before picture---with my grandpa...Oh, how I wish he could have lived to see me finally do what he hoped and prayed I would someday.

Huge before shot...oh my...

Eating before a speaking engagement! Lasagna no less!! ;)

Certainly a highlight for me during 2010!


Oh least favorite before picture. But kind of funny...

The first time I ever had both, mom and dad, in the same room together. It was a very big moment for me in 2010.

With Amber!

Goal. Very sweet.

Love this before and after comparison picture.

Get ready, because 2011 is shaping up to be a monumental year!! I can't wait! My New Years Resolution is to be more organized--and hopefully that translates to more frequent updates on this blog!! Thank you for reading, watching, listening, and thank you for your support!

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