Wednesday, May 23, 2018

May 23rd, 2018 Harmonious

May 23rd, 2018 Harmonious

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Today was a good day from start to finish. Tonight was the week 1 early and late calls for my conference call support group and it was a great experience. There's something very special about being part of a team. Especially when everyone on the team can relate in so many powerful ways.

Facebook Micro-Blog post that popped up as a memory today. From four years ago:
I've been trying to identify and best articulate the most critical element transforming extreme struggle into harmonious consistency. Having experienced both, it's a fascinating study. Sure, it's a combination of elements, but what is the one, that without, all the others become ineffective? Is it acceptance, where suddenly we embrace instead of reject? That's fine, but how do we get to a place of acceptance? I keep coming back to perspective. Dr. Wayne Dyer says it so perfectly: “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” 

The perspective we choose is paramount to our success, of course. Sometimes, finding the perspective that engages the gear you're looking for isn't as easy as someone saying, “change your perspective.” 

In my opinion, we first must identify, one by one—the mind noise and clutter that keeps our perspective in a locked position. It's mental work that's worth the effort. Because if we can get past these things and truly shift our perspective, suddenly what once seemed impossible becomes not only possible, it becomes our new everyday practice and reality, a non-physical transformation where we can finally experience the seemingly elusive, harmonious consistency.

Today's featured Tweet:


Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

May 22nd, 2018 Nearly Twenty Years

May 22nd, 2018 Nearly Twenty Years

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

I spent nearly twenty years near, at, or above 500 pounds.



















I tried several different ways to lose weight over the years but nothing worked for very long. When I stopped dieting and opened my mind, eyes, and ears to something different, that's when things started changing. Some major things were missing from previous attempts: Accountability and support. Once I started this blog in September 2008, I started learning about the positive power accountability and support creates. It changed everything.



















There are many ways to create accountability and support measures. You certainly don't have to write a blog and you don't have to bare your heart and soul to the world. That's not what it's about. It's more about finding, in whatever way you can, a group of people experiencing similar challenges, struggles, and triumphs. When you find that group of people who truly understand, something magical can happen. Suddenly, you're not alone.  I stumbled upon a wonderful group of people who found my blog over the years and discovered how they could relate in powerful ways with my experience. Those connections made a difference for me. When someone thanks me for something I've written on this blog, I accept it graciously-- but before the conversation ends, I thank them for their support. Good support goes both ways, always.

The accountability and support group I facilitate every Wednesday night starts a brand new 8-week session tomorrow night (the 23rd). It's not too late for you to join our team. It's a small and exclusive group of people who truly "get it." Wherever you are along this road, you'll fit right in with us.

To be honest, I'm not a very good marketer of my group or myself, really. I could get the word out much quicker and bigger, I'm sure. But it's okay. Small and exclusive is just fine! Do you want to be a part of something special? Are you ready to create a plan unique to you--a plan that is sustainable long-term? A plan that can get you unstuck?? A plan that can evolve into something bringing you consistent results?

So this is it-- the next session starts tomorrow night and I have a space for you on our late Wednesday call that starts at 9:15pm Eastern/8:15pm Central/6:15pm Pacific. The early call is full.

You'll find more details on the poster:
Click to enlarge
 



















If you have any questions, call or text: 580-491-2228 or send an email: transformation.road@gmail.com If you're ready to register, let me know--and I'll get you in the group and on the team!

Today's Featured Tweet:


Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Monday, May 21, 2018

May 21st, 2018 It's Not

May 21st, 2018 It's Not

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Sometimes, when I'm stressed, the best thing for me is a good workout while listening to something that inspires me. It isn't always music. This evening's workout listening was a good interview between Marc Maron and comedian Neal Brennan. My brain tells me excess food is the answer. My experience tells me it's not. Choosing an action instead of a reaction helps. My action was the workout. The action delivered. The reaction would have disappointed. Pausing long enough to act instead of reacting is certainly one of those daily practices. I'd like to have it hard wired into me but I've heard that isn't possible! So, if it's impossible, the practice continues!

After a nice visit with mom, I made it to the store for dinner ingredients. I made a pan prepared sweet potato-red onion-red pepper dish with oven "fried" fresh catfish filets.

If you're ready to discover the difference good accountability and support can make for your daily practice, join my exclusive and private support group! All members of the team are on the same "secret" Facebook group page and each week for the next 8 weeks, starting this Wednesday, we get together for group coaching/mentoring. Our 8pm Eastern group call is full, however, our late call at 9:15pm Eastern still has spots available. Reserve your spot by contacting me as soon as possible! A very limited number of spots remain. Email me for registration details: transformation.road@gmail.com or call/text 580-491-2228.



















Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

 

Sunday, May 20, 2018

May 20th, 2018 Eventful

May 20th, 2018 Eventful

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

I made the trip to Wichita today to attend Cindy's daughter's high school graduation. It was a big graduation! I met her oldest son for the first time today. He's twenty-four and lives several states away. It was a very good experience all the way around. Now I can say I've met all of her children. She's met mine, too!

I got back in town for my Sunday evening visit with mom. We enjoyed dinner out at our favorite little Mexican place followed by a trip to Walmart. I'm home now and ready to drop in bed!

It's been an eventful weekend!

It's too late to share much else tonight. But once again, I do want to remind you of a special opportunity to join my new conference call support group! The new session starts Wednesday the 23rd. The early group call is full, but I have room in the late group call. Click the image below for more details and please contact me soon!




















Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean



Saturday, May 19, 2018

May 19th, 2018 Finally

May 19th, 2018 Finally

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Finally, it happened! Photobucket released the block on previously posted photos and actually came up with a reasonable plan. All photos 3rd party hosted by photobucket throughout the archives of this blog are now restored. Good deal! It was very upsetting when they suddenly removed the images and essentially demanded a ransom of several hundred dollars for their safe return. It was quite the storm across the internet when that happened. Now, a new management team is in place and I applaud them loudly for this reasonable resolution.

I've been activated for severe weather coverage four times in the last 25 hours. Three of those activations with Noah in tow. My goodness, he was getting tired of hanging out at the studio. I don't blame him. But we did have some good memory making times together. He absolutely loved Touch-A-Truck at the library this morning. I have some cute pictures of the event, our visit with Raegan, and more--but way too late to do it now. I'll post those tomorrow night.

One thing I did want to mention is my new conference call support group set for Wednesday nights. I'm facilitating these groups solo with backup when necessary by retired Life Coach Gerri Helms. The next session starts this Wednesday the 23rd. We have two one hour conference calls back to back. The first hour from 8-9pm Eastern is full. The second hour from 9:15pm-10:15pm Eastern has openings! Here's the information poster:



















It's a little blurry--I'll work on getting a higher resolution copy of this. If you have questions about this group, call or text: 580-491-2228 or send an email to: transformation.road@gmail.com

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Friday, May 18, 2018

May 18th, 2018 Two Of Us

May 18th, 2018 Two Of Us

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Today was one of those days that wouldn't stop. To be fair, a day like this is really rare for me, so I'm not complaining. I left the house before 6am and didn't walk in the door until almost 11:30pm tonight--then turned back around after being home for literally five minutes to report back to work for severe weather coverage until after 1am. If Noah hadn't been super excited about spending the night with Po Po (that's me), I probably would have canceled our time together tonight after a 13.5-hour workday and instead, simply picked him up tomorrow--but no way, not after hearing how excited he was about the two of us spending time together. 

Noah and I enjoyed a good dinner together before visiting with grandma, making a store run for stuff he needs, and getting back to my place for the above mentioned five minutes. I took him to the studio with me and after he realized we weren't there to play on the microphones, he stayed quiet while I did on-air weather updates.

This little guy never tires, apparently. On the way home he asked if we could watch a movie. Uh, no.

Hitting the pillow, finally! We're visiting the library in the morning for the Touch-A-Truck event!! Fun!

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Thursday, May 17, 2018

May 17th, 2018 Needed To Hear

May 17th, 2018 Needed To Hear

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

This entire experience--and I mean all of it, has been and continues to be a blessing in my life. This blog has played a very important role for me over the last nearly ten years. Its primary purpose is to serve as an accountability tool, a place for me to express my thoughts, a place to bring my struggles, and a place to share my victories along the way. This blog helps keep me well. And the only time it didn't is when I stopped regularly posting during my relapse/regain period.

What quickly developed in these pages was something more, something bigger--a place where you can come, read, and find hope. It means the world to me when I get feedback from someone who's reading along or perhaps they've taken a dive into the archives and they've come up to send an email to let me know how it's affected them in a positive way. It just does my heart good to know that by way of sharing this experience, it has the potential to make a positive difference for someone else.

I'm incredibly grateful. I thank God for my daily practice, for this blog, and for the amazing people I keep close in my life.

I was feeling a little down this morning. It happens. Some of the contributing thoughts were, "am I doing enough?" or "Is what I do on this blog or my support group a positive thing?" or "How can I do better?"  

The first question I must ask myself: Am I okay with my personal plan practice? Yes. And that means a lot to me. That's the primary focus. I must be well before anything else.

Then, I had a wonderful conversation with a friend who not only expressed some wonderful ideas for me, she also expressed how what I do has value and what it means. I really needed to hear her words.

Then I checked my email while enjoying lunch and up pops an email from a reader in Rhode Island:

Hi Sean, just a note to say hello, and thank you for your continued daily blogging. Your blog is on my daily list and I truly appreciate your sharing your ups and also your challenges. Your Epiphany Day revisit was an honor to read, and I agree with you that no matter what your size, you are a great person to have on this planet! (smile)  It warms my heart when you post pictures of your family - the grandkids are so adorable and only getting cuter over time!  and I see the sincerity and warmth of the smiles on the faces of you with your adult family members.

Please, feel no need to respond to this message - I know from your blog your schedule is very busy and I really just wanted to express appreciation FOR YOU  and for all your work and your courage in sharing and let you know that you are making a real (and positive!) difference in the lives of other people. (more smiles)

Also, I wanted to mention that I listened to your recent podcast with Bryan Ganey and that was wonderful also!  It was cute how your Mom was on in the beginning, asking when the Bryan Ganey interview would start!  thank you again.

Best regards,
Sandra (in Rhode Island)

Thank you so much, Sandra.

I feel incredibly blessed and grateful. I'll keep doing what I do around here. There's nothing more rewarding than feeling like I can make a difference for someone else simply by sharing my experience and story. And by doing that, It helps keep me well, too.



















Today's featured Tweet:


Cindy came into town this evening for a visit. We enjoyed dinner together before a quick store run and a trip to visit with mom. It was very nice!

After getting to bed too late last night, I plan on getting a little more rest tonight!

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

May 16th, 2018 Sure I Did

May 16th, 2018 Sure I Did

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Oh, I knew it all. Sure I did. I somehow knew it all, yet still remained a 500-pound man for years.

Opening my mind and allowing a closer internal study and embracing a fresh new perspective wasn't easy for stubborn old me.

But after allowing this refreshing shift, I clearly realized how I held myself back for years. I wanted the outer changes but I was unwilling to change the inside and quite honestly, I was unwilling to do the work.

Changing the mindset—shifting the perspective---and giving myself permission to simplify the process allowed me to focus my energies on my internal wiring. This internal focus was the missing link in past attempts. I still don't know it all, never will and that's a good thing. Because if I did, I'd be stunting my own growth...again.

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

May 15th, 2018 I Am Me-Epiphany Day Revisited

May 15th, 2018 I Am Me-Epiphany Day Revisited

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

After the short night of sleep because of the late night weather coverage at the studio, today was challenging! When I'm super-tired like that I'm most vulnerable. It took staying connected with support, planning my food well, and getting home for a good nap before my evening activities.

I was refreshed and ready for a good night on a group support call and one on one support session. I made a quick trip to see mom tonight before heading home for my favorite sour cream chicken tacos!

Today is the 4th anniversary of what I refer to as my epiphany day. That day was very special to me. No other epiphany along this road has resonated as deeply and fully as the one I experienced that day. I can go back and look at the analytics of these individual blog postings, all 2,300 of them, and May 15th, 2014 is nowhere near the most popular page. It wouldn't even be in the top 50, yet, to me--it's one of the most important days I've experienced in the last nearly ten years.

Let's hop in the DDWL Time Machine and go back to May 15th, 2014. I was a few weeks into my turnaround from relapse/regain when this was written:

I failed to mention my brush with law enforcement last evening.  I was in too much of a hurry to get to the YMCA. I was in a 40 mph zone and when it switched to a 30 mph zone, I kept going 37 mph. The officer asked for my license and insurance verification and much to my surprise, both had expired 04/30/2014.  I had insurance, of course, I just didn't have a current verification. I received a warning for the speeding and two citations for the other offenses. The officer told me to present proof of both, and the tickets would be dismissed. This meant two stops this morning, one to the insurance office and one to the tag agency where they issue the new driver's license. Both citations were dismissed.

I have the last three licenses and each picture shows a different stage of my transformation. The last was taken at 258 pounds. It was the first time my license reflected the truth about my weight.  The weights on my licenses have always shown a number between 50 and 108 pounds less than reality.  But not the last one--and I was so proud of that license because of what it represented. I was proud and confident in it and the weight displayed was accurate for a change. I didn't want to part with it today.  Luckily, I didn't have to. The new photo shows my considerable weight gain and since I unintentionally forgot to remind them--they left the weight as 258.  Oh well. As I once again achieve an optimal healthy weight, I'll have it redone to reflect the changes.

The more I thought about all of the energy I was giving this new license thing, specifically the required photo, the more I started thinking on a deeper level.

I felt a slight twinge of shame, regret, and embarrassment at the tag office today. It's lessened considerably since getting firmly back on track. But it's still there.

Then, I had an epiphany on the way to the YMCA tonight.

Why in the world should I ever allow the shape of my face or the size of my pants determine my self-worth? This isn't how I treat others, so why would I treat me that way? 

And then I started thinking about the differences between how I felt about me at 505 and how I felt at 230 and that's when I experienced a breakthrough in my thinking.

At that moment I imagined the scales of justice. On one side was my love for the non-physical parts (my mind, my sense of humor, my talents, my heart, my natural compassion for others, my ability to communicate, etc.) and the other side of the scale was my love for things physical about me.

The personal injustice has been the obvious imbalance and distribution of my love for self. 

At my heaviest, I had nearly zero love for the physical and what little love I had for the non-physical was small, barely existent and unacknowledged because I was too busy hating the way I looked.

At my healthiest weight, I still paid little attention to the non-physical attributes because I was too busy loving the way I looked. 

Throughout my entire life, I've largely ignored the important things that make me who I am.

My most intense focus was either hating the way I looked or loving the way I looked.

With this narrow-minded perspective, the only source of identity and self-worth remaining relied almost exclusively on my appearance.

It isn't any wonder why I've limited myself over the years.  Even worse is the natural tendency to project this fluctuating self-perspective onto others, as in, if I feel this way about me, surely they do too. 

When I think about my closest loved ones, I realize their perspective of me is never conditional based on appearance. When I spend time with mom, she doesn't even notice the weight gain, she just sees her son. When I pick up my grandson and he looks at me and smiles, it's an innate understanding that I'm someone who loves him deeply and will protect and care for him no matter what. When I spend time with my daughters, it's clear their love for me isn't placed on a scale, ever.

And then I realized: This is what they mean when they say you must love yourself first before you can fully experience and appreciate the love and richness of life.

If I was confused before, it was very clear now. I'm a great person worthy of love regardless of my size and appearance. I have my mind, sense of humor, talents, a big heart, loads of compassion for others and so very much more. And none of it is diminished with weight gain or increased with weight loss. 

I am me, always.

And my journey will continue toward a healthier weight because I want to live, I want to move easier, I want to experience the freedom a healthy body weight provides. Regardless of how this journey goes, I believe I just discovered one of my greatest personal freedoms of all.  

All of this was processed over a ten minute period as I drove to my workout tonight, as if by divine placement in my brain, an answer to my unspoken, silent plea, why do I feel this way??

I walked into the YMCA tonight with a confidence I haven't felt in a very long time. I climbed aboard the orange trimmed elliptical and proceeded to have my best personal workout, possibly ever. My stride was longer. Within the mechanics of the machine, I was sprinting. And this energy never subsided. Last night I stopped ten minutes earlier than planned. Tonight, I could have easily done another twenty.
-------------------
If you didn't know before, now you know why May 15th will always be a red letter day for me.

I better hit the pillow.

Sincerely, thank you for reading along all these years,
Strength,
Sean

Monday, May 14, 2018

May 14th, 2018 Something

May 14th, 2018 Something

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Just got back home from doing weather coverage all night. I'll keep tonight's edition real short.

I ended up preparing a late dinner at the studio. I didn't really want an egg and cheese sandwich or tostadas--and those were my options at work tonight, but I was tired and hungry, so an egg and cheese sandwich on toasted ezekiel bread and a cup of coffee did the trick. It wasn't a big deal! I'm glad I was prepared with something!

It's almost 12:30am...alarm comes early--4:30am, I better drop!

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean





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