Day 155
Stressful Triggers VS Motivating Thoughts and The Perfect Physique Guy
It feels so good to be so far along on this journey. Day 155 has been a really good day food and exercise wise. As far as personal stress, it's been a little trying today, but these “stressful triggers” may have to lose the word “triggers,” because they never shake me anymore. If anything they make me stronger. If you've read some of the early days of this blog you've read exactly how stressful triggers have played a key role in my inability to stay on track in the past. I would always do fine until a bunch of stress came along, and then I'd run to the nearest store for ice cream and anything else I could get my hands on. I'm very proud that I've reached a point where stressful triggers no longer have an effect on my performance. I've learned to identify them and defend against them. “Stressful Triggers” meet “Motivating Thoughts,” now “Motivating Thoughts,” kick “Stressful Triggers” rear end. These mental exercises may sound crazy sometimes, but believe me, they do wonders for my success. Stressful Triggers do not roam alone either, oh no, they have a best friends named “Emotional Blahs.” You know what I'm talking about. Those days when, for whatever reason, we just feel “not with it.” I don't have time to feel “not with it.” Do I still have emotional days where I feel vulnerable? Of course! Don't we all? I just handle them very differently now. I can remember saying “I don't feel like working out,” but I've found if you just go do it, you'll feel incredible in a very short time. By the time you start “feeling like” working out, you're done. When I think back on all the emotional ups and downs along the way so far, from losing loved ones, to re-connecting with my father, to losing a brother I never knew, to speaking for the very first time with another brother I've never known, to the holidays, and right through disappointing weigh day totals where I thought I deserved better results...I have to say, I'm doing this. I'm doing this right here and right now. And there's no settling for anything less than total health and fitness. There isn't a stressful trigger or emotional blah that can break my stride now my friend. If you are embarking on this journey now, and you're just now reading this blog, you might be thinking “Sean makes it sound so easy!” Trust me, it's been a struggle many times...just go back in the archives and read from Day 1. If you read the Myspace version you'll have to subscribe to have access to everyday, but if you're reading the “global” version (www.losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com), then everyday is archived on the left hand side of your screen.
A very interesting thing happened tonight. Let me start by saying that when I'm on that treadmill, I usually am completely oblivious to people around me. I'm off in my own little world. I'm feeling the burn in my muscles, the sweat on my body, and the increased heart rate of a good cardiovascular workout. I've talked about closing my eyes and getting lost in music so deep, I almost no longer notice that I'm exerting a bunch of energy, let alone anyone around me. But tonight I couldn't help but notice a guy in the fitness center. He had the kind of physique I've always dreamed of. When I imagine what I'll look like someday, it's this kind of physique I'm imagining. I tried not to gawk, because that's something you just don't do at the fitness center, it's impolite, and can be interpreted as creepy. I certainly wasn't trying to be creepy, I was just in awe of his physical perfection. Don't get the wrong idea, I'm completely confident 100% in my heterosexuality, I'm just secure enough to admit and recognize when someone has put the time and effort into sculpting such a physique. At one point I think he noticed me looking a little too long at him, so I quit admiring, closed my eyes and listened to my music. Then when I opened them again, he was on the treadmill right beside me. I wanted to stop my workout and ask him if he was a personal trainer, and if so, where do I sign? But I decided against it, after all, I didn't want to interrupt his workout too! When I finished and made my way to the paper towels and disinfectant spray I noticed he was on one of the sit down cycles. I thought “should I ask him?” But i just couldn't. He had his headphones on, he was working, I wasn't going to bother him. I cleaned my machine and headed to the fountain for water. Courtney was ready by this time and before we left I pointed him out to her. I told her “look at that guy Court, that's what I want to look like someday, that's the body I dream about having!” I told Courtney what I wanted to ask him, and she encouraged me to do it. “Go do it daddy!” But still I couldn't. We stood there while I contemplated for a couple of minutes, before ultimately deciding to leave without introducing myself. As we walked away I said “ya know, maybe he'll be here again someday, since he obviously has a membership, and I'll get a chance to speak to him another time about weight training.” Courtney said “what if he isn't?” And I almost walked over then, but still felt it might be a little too awkward. So we hit the parking lot feeling great about our workouts and we were still talking about that guy all the way to the convenience store for gas and a Powerade Zero calorie drink. The clerk asked about the Powerade Zero, and I told her that we just finshed a workout at the YMCA, and just as the words left my mouth, I noticed a person at the opposite counter. It was the guy! He too was getting gas and a similar drink! We made eye contact and I awkwardly blurted out, “hey, you were there too!” I couldn't pass up the opportunity to introduce myself this time, this was an unexpected second chance! I told him a brief history of this journey so far and I asked him about his. He said he'd been working out since he was 13, and I think he said he even was into competitive bodybuilding at one time. We spoke outside by the gas pumps for maybe three or four minutes. I asked if he was a trainer, and he said he's always happy to help someone who's really committed. We exchanged information, including this blog address, and he was so nice. I think he could sense how committed I am to this journey, because when you get me talking about it, the passion flows like a river! Isn't that cool?
I'm really excited for the start of the “Lose To Win” community wide weight loss challenge here in Ponca City. I really believe it's going to help many people get on track. Today we had to re-produce all of the promos and commercials because the response has been big enough already, they're changing to a larger venue for the kick off meeting! That's exciting. I'm going to assist Courtney with some homework, then it's off to bed for a nice rest! Thank you for reading, good night and...
Good Choices,
Sean
LOL, Thanks for the comments and compliments Sean. Yes, I've been in the "gym" on and off since I was 13 (I'll be 42 Saturday) I'm always thrilled to meet someone who wants to make "Good choices" with plans and definite goals. I have never officially competed, accept competing with my own aspirations. I would be more than happy to assist in your journey. Congratulations on your achievements thus far, shows commitment and dedication to a healthier lifestyle – with loads of sacrifice, sweat, nutrition and training out of the comfort zone! You have my e-mail, send me yours we’ll take it from there. “…one percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration – Thomas Edison” - "The Guy" aka Mark
ReplyDeleteSean your motivation and spirit is contagious! How else could you have met a new exercise buddy and also get Dr. Amy to stalk you in the Walmart freezer aisle. :) I just had to comment and thank you for inspiring me when I'm standing at an open freezer at 10:30pm looking at ice cream or too tired to write another health talk. I wish I could see you talk at the Lose to Win Challenge! But I know you will do great!
ReplyDeleteYours In Health,
Dr. Amy (but you can call me Amy) ;)
Whew! I finally finished reading your blog from the beginning! I had begun reading at day 91 and have been keeping up with your new posts but wanted to read all the prior ones to find out how you started and persevered to this point. I am so glad that I did. Wow! Your honesty and your determination to meet your goals really make your posts powerful and meaningful. I love reading all the details you include that show your strengths and your weaknesses, as well as how and why you make the choices that you make each day.
ReplyDeletei dont know if i can sean
ReplyDeleteme