Day 79 Freedom and Fat Jokes

Day 79

Freedom and Fat Jokes

Today was the kind of day that makes me say “this is easy!” Not one single crazy urge/craving hit me today. We went to the Y and had a great workout. I learned that you have to have an appointment for one on one time with a trainer, that makes complete sense. My appointment is scheduled for six p.m. Tomorrow evening. So instead of the weight training, I stuck with the treadmill and racquetball court. Irene was with us tonight and she worked hard, doing a 5K on the treadmill! That's not easy, and she was trekking right along at 4.0 mph! Courtney out did us both with the best workout she's ever had, over four miles on the elliptical. She credits her recently revived I-Pod with pushing her to go further. Music is a wonderful tool while working out. I'm hoping Santa brings me an mp3 player of some sort, not an I-Pod, just something cheap that plays music. I just hope that I can keep myself from singing with it on while I'm at the Y. I talked to Amber and she also credits a better workout to her newly revived I-Pod. So I think we've un-scientifically proven that listening to your favorite music can be a real booster while working out. I know, duh! I've talked about how important music is to me as a motivator, but I really don't listen to as much as I should. I know that might sound strange considering what I do for a living, but listening to music for pleasure and motivation? I don't do enough of that.

I'm so excited about getting to the new year. 2009 is going to be my best year ever because I'm going to make it that way! There's a good chance I'll hit my goal in late 2009, and even if it takes a little longer, that's OK. The differences I already feel will be continuously multiplied as each month passes. I feel like I've been set free. Free from the shortness of breath I always had at over 500 pounds, free from the pain of simply walking into a store, and free of the hopeless feeling that accompanied me during my most out of control eating days. That's really what this mission is all about, it's freedom from obesity and all of the horrible things that it involves.

It'll be interesting how this transformation will effect my stand-up. When I started doing stand-up ten years ago, about 95% of my act was dependent on my size. Over the years I slowly added “fat-free” material, but still to this day my standard set list contains at least 65% weight related material. At my last performance I tried to do just a few weight related bits, but I focused more on family stuff that had nothing to do with my weight. That felt good. For the longest time I wondered if I could make an audience laugh without being self-deprecating over my weight. What's funny is, I think back to the set that clinched my hiring at the Hollywood Improv, and 95% of it had nothing to do with my weight. The best parts of that set were news/topical items. You see, long gone are the days of Louie Anderson. Louie started his career with mostly fat jokes and it landed him straight onto the Tonight Show stage. If you do that today, or in 2003 when I was there, you wouldn't get a second look. I can count on one hand the number of overweight comics whose weight remains the main focus of their act. For me, it was a convenience thing, it was easy and very effective. The audiences loved it, the other comics didn't respect it, and all I cared about was making people laugh. So it worked very well for me. In reading this paragraph you would think I still do stand-up all the time, nope, only about two or three shows a year. I use to do more than that in a weekend! But I do miss it, and someday would like to rediscover it, and rediscover myself as a comic. I really believe being of normal weight would make me a much better comic. It'll be interesting to someday find out.

Thank you for the outpouring of support today after last night's blog. Your words of encouragement help tremendously. It helped turn today into a fantastic day! I kind of feel bad when I post something like yesterdays or Day 60's blog, but I have to be honest 100% with you. This blog's integrity must never be compromised. And in keeping it 100% real and honest, I have to report when I feel like eating a couple of large pizzas and a gallon of Coke. The point of this blog is to post the daily thoughts, emotions, philosophies, stories, and daily experiences that go along with losing a bunch of weight. And it isn't all happy fun-fun stuff. Sometimes it's funny, sometimes it's serious, sometimes it's just kind of boring. But it is what it is, a daily account along the journey of a lifetime. Wow, that was dramatic huh? Well, it is a journey of a lifetime! I'm going into Day 80 with complete confidence and determination. Thanks again for reading. Good night and...

Good Choices,
Sean