Monday, October 28, 2019

October 28th, 2019 Dramatic Ways

October 28th, 2019 Dramatic Ways

Since our last edition, I've maintained the integrity of my calorie budget, I've remained refined sugar-free, I've met or exceeded my daily water goal, I completed a 5K walk in the park yesterday evening, and I've stayed well connected with exceptional support.

Mom continues to respond well to treatment. The care and attention she's receiving in the critical care unit are top-notch, as the name suggests. I've had some really good conversations with her nurses and doctors and the insights they've offered have helped me wrap my brain around understanding mom's condition, and also why this seems to be a reoccurring thing. Respiratory failure takes a combination of things to happen. Shallow breathing, the fluid that pools because of congestive heart failure, the increased c02 levels, the decreased oxygen levels, her difficulty in consistently wearing her cpap--all of these things, not necessarily in that order, contribute to things turning into this critical care situation. Her care team is aggressively preparing her post-hospital care plan and that'll be passed along to the nursing home. I'm relieved for the certainty her exceptional care is providing and I'm immensely grateful she's getting this level of care.
Yesterday at dinner time

Some of our favorite pics together

Knowing she's being cared for frees up enough mental, emotional, and physical energy for me to continue my daily practice of personal care. Last evening's 5K walk is the longest I've completed in quite a while. It felt great! My 80's pop playlist kept churning out the hits of my youth--and that kept me enthusiastically making my way around that walking trail. It's the same trail I started walking on the evening of Day 1 at 505 pounds, so of course, there's always an extra special feeling when I'm back on that ground.

The added focus on gratitude during my morning foundation routine continues to make an exceptional positive difference. Feeling and expressing gratitude has always had its place along this road, but in a way where I would make and take an occasional pause for gratitude, usually, these were in the moment type acknowledgments. Giving gratitude reflection its own "time slot" in my personal morning routine, first thing upon waking is different--and much better for me.

The willingness to do things differently is sometimes a hard thing to find. It is, in my opinion, because I have a strong tendency to get set in my ways. I must be mindful of this dynamic. The roots of this setting seem to be firmly grounded in my deeply ingrained, yet counterproductive desire to go it alone--or figure it out--or the thoughts of, I know what to do, I just got to do it. These mental settings are all about the need to control. Letting go of this desire for control isn't and never has been easy for me. At the same time--when I have let go; closed my mouth and opened my eyes and ears, what I've received has helped shape and change things in dramatic ways.

In the areas of my life that have undergone a dramatic and positive transformation, it's almost exclusively a product of what I've learned from others who have what I want. Still, in other areas, I continue to hold the reigns tightly. Isn't that an interesting dynamic? It is for me.

These patterns and grooves of our lives are not easy to give up. The grooves are created early and made stronger with each passing year and decade. Like many of us, it started young for me. What's true is this: The patterns can be interrupted. Things can change for the better as a result. And what once seemed impossible can become not just possible, but our reality.

Pardon me for going straight into a sales pitch. But...Do you own an "I'm Choosing Change" wristband? Here's the deal, I'm not a very good salesman. I haven't offered these in a while on this blog--yet, I have them available! I wear mine daily as a constant reminder of why my daily practice of things is important. I'm not alone, either. This powerful message is worn on the wrists of people in a dozen states, maybe more, I haven't counted--but it's up there!! From New York to California and from Canada all the way to Scotland, they're out there! For me, it's simply a daily reminder to be open, willing, mindful, to pause, and to be intentional. If I'm not those things, I get stuck at the line of least resistance and back there is where the old patterns and behaviors thrive. Your order includes priority shipping so you'll get it quickly! Here's the link to order yours right now:
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Practice, peace, and calm,

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1 comment:

  1. I'm thinking of your Mom and saying a prayer. My husband was in and out of the hospital every 4 to 6 weeks because of CHF. His heart had grown to the size of a soccer ball (supposed to be the size of a human fist). The doctors at Yale New Haven Hospital installed a heart pump almost 5 and a half years ago and he's an amazing 82 years old and so active and healthy! Have you or your Mom thought of asking about a heart pump? Life would be much easier for both of you if it worked out - I know how worrisome it is for both the patient and those that love her to live with CHF. Just a thought. Hugs to you both...


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