Sunday, April 1, 2018

April 1st, 2018 Proper Place

April 1st, 2018 Proper Place

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Today started with a church service, included a dinner out with loved ones, and a shopping trip with mom and Noah. Noah had a choice today: Easter candy or a toy. He picked a toy! He's definitely my grandson, so we're left head scratching at that choice! Oh, and when did my grandson turn into a teenager? The headphones on and device in his hands makes him seem so much older!



















A holiday like today can certainly present some challenges, especially if a plan isn't in place. My food plan today was set and within the boundaries of my maintenance budget. One of the many things I'm grateful for is reaching a point where the focus isn't squarely on the food, it's on the people and experiences around me. These things were once ignored when I was "in the food," but now, the food is still good--it just takes its proper place in my life. Reaching this point isn't set in stone. I can lose this place quickly if I don't maintain my daily practice. When I feel vulnerable on any particular day, aside from reaching for support and a few other things, I do my best to pause and remember how this proper perspective feels.

If you're new to this blog, welcome! The archives contain posts dating back to Day 1, September 15th, 2008. I invite you to read along from 505 pounds, to goal, back up the scale, then finally an approach and practice over the last four years that brought me back from the brink of gaining it all back, to a healthy body weight, and now continues to keep me well one day at a time.

I hope you had a fantastic Easter!

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Saturday, March 31, 2018

March 31st, 2018 Grateful

March 31st, 2018 Grateful

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Emceeing the film festival went well tonight! Cindy accompanied me for the special evening.



















I'm so grateful she and I found one another. It's insanely wonderful how much we have in common, in weight loss and plenty of other ways!

I intentionally tilted my food schedule again today to accommodate a late meal after the festival. I still left a few hundred calories on the table, but that's okay when it's this late!

I could have tilted it the other direction with an early dinner before the show, but I've never liked eating before a performance of any kind. It goes back to my standup comedy days. 

I wasn't doing standup last night or tonight, I was simply the emcee, but anytime a stage, audience, and a microphone get involved, it brings back a flood of wonderful memories of those days long ago. It's fitting to get home and find a Tweet from Ralphie May's Twitter account. Whoever is handling Ralphie's Twitter since his passing, thank you! 
Ralphie, Lahna, and I were roommates for a short time during my Los Angeles standup days. Ralphie and I were very close in size and weight. We were also occasional binge buddies. Oh, the memories of Popeye's Chicken and In-N-Out Burger spread out all over the couch, both of us diving in, polishing off enough food to feed a family of five. When it came to food, we certainly spoke the same language and completely understood one another. Rest in peace, Ralphie. You're missed by a lot of people all over the world. 

Ralphie finished his book before he passed too young and I highly recommend it! You can find it anywhere books are sold--and of course, on Amazon. It's called: This Might Get A Little Heavy: A Memoir.

I better drop in bed. There's an Easter egg hunt with my grandsons Noah and Oliver tomorrow!

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Friday, March 30, 2018

March 30th, 2018 Same Size

March 30th, 2018 Same Size

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Sleeping in this morning was fabulous. I needed the rest! I plan on doing the same in the morning. I intentionally tilted my food schedule today because I didn't want to eat dinner right before emceeing the Bison Bison Film Festival tonight. It made for a really late dinner for Cindy and me, but it was okay. I've never been one to worry about the time. If it's ridiculously late, I've been known to leave some calories on the table, but it wasn't too bad tonight.

My emcee job tonight went well even though I read a typo without thinking first and horribly flubbed one of the film titles. Oh well, it happens, and it was okay. The rest of the night worked very well. Cindy joined me for the event tonight and she is planning on dressing up with me (I'll be in a tuxedo) for tomorrow night's films and awards.

I must note how it feels to once again emcee this event at the same size as the year before. It's simply amazing to me. The annual events like this become the biggest reminders. I can remember times when the reminder was very different and not at all desirable!! But this--oh my, this, is a very blessed thing. I'm so grateful for the support, the plan, and the practice each and every day that helps keeps me well.

Tomorrow will basically be a carbon copy of today except for the formal attire. I'll make sure we get pictures!

Amber, KL, and Baby Raegan are doing very well, by the way. My youngest, Courtney, is set to deliver Phoebe on Tuesday if she doesn't before that day. It's an exciting time around here!

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Thursday, March 29, 2018

March 29th, 2018 Opinion

March 29th, 2018 Opinion

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Today I was asked about my opinion on "cheat days" or "cheat meals." 

In my book, Transformation Road, I wrote about my philosophy on cheat days or cheat meals--or cheating, period. If what I'm doing is so restrictive and against the grain of what I can do for the rest of my life, then perhaps I need to change what I'm doing. For me to accept a "cheat day," suggests that what I'm doing the rest of the time is just a means to an end. If I'm constantly looking forward to the day when I can cut loose--then I might want to inspect the daily restraints. This isn't about defining restrictions, it's about refining solutions--making this something enjoyable, doable--workable, delicious--satisfying...and if we can make it all that, then why would we feel the need to deviate into old behaviors for a day or a meal? If what I'm doing is a temporary means to an end--and I'm forcing myself to do something unnatural to me and what I like--then I'm setting myself up for a monumental problem down the line.

I was also asked about how not eating refined sugar has helped me over the past four years.

The abstinence from refined sugar has made a profound impact bio-chemically--effectively turning off the "binge switch" and ushering in a peace and calm I never knew. But as I've discussed before--it doesn't stop the other side of things--the deeply ingrained pattern of seeking comfort with food in times of extreme emotion and high stress.

It's not as easy as simply agreeing that excess food doesn't fix anything--or that food isn't a therapist. It doesn't matter how long or how much success we're experiencing, I've learned that unless I reach out for support, I'm perfectly capable of talking myself into the comfort food dynamic.

My success isn't a guarantee. I'm not entitled. It's not automatic. If I stop doing the things I'm doing, I'll quickly fall hard.

This here thing is a daily practice--a one day at a time practice of uniquely crafted fundamental elements. I just want one more day feeling as good as I feel when I'm honoring my commitment and maintaining the integrity of my plan. I'd like a whole bunch of one more days.

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Wednesday, March 28, 2018

March 28th, 2018 It's What I Do

March 28th, 2018 It's What I Do

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Jordan's words from yesterday's post really resonate with me. I used the words "I know" over and over, too. And like Jordan, those words almost killed me. And still, to this day, those words are dangerous for me because I've discovered it isn't what I know that's important, it's what I do. 

When I look back at my nearly twenty years as a 500-pound man, I realize my "know" was very limited. I knew the very basics of eating less and moving more. What I didn't know at that time was how these two things were truly the least of what I needed to learn. The barrier for me all those years ago was my constant declaration of "knowing." If we know it all, then we haven't a need to learn more, and we can't because we've essentially shut down our potential for growth.

What I didn't know back then was how the non-food, non-exercise elements; the structure of support and accountability, was/are the things constantly supporting the plan. "Structure of support," to me is a fairly broad phrase covering everything from my morning prayer/meditations, positive visualizations, planning/prep, weighing, measuring, logging, and of course, direct one on one support connections each and every day. When I would say "I know what to do," back then, I wasn't thinking about any of these things because I didn't know.

Even today, I'm the first to admit--I don't know it all. I've experienced a lot. I've learned some things in the hardest ways. I've defined and refined the plan that works well for me again and again. I've evolved nicely, but there's more to learn--more to experience, more to appreciate and consider. Staying open-minded, humble, and willing to watch, listen, and learn is, in my opinion, imperative to continued positive progress.

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Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Tuesday, March 27, 2018

March 27th, 2018 I Know, I Know

March 27th, 2018 I Know, I Know

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

I'm republishing a guest post from May of last year written by my friend Jordan Burgess.

I think I've had one other guest post in the history of this blog. I asked for his permission to republish it here. It's powerful stuff!

Thank you, Jordan!

"I Know" by Jordan Burgess (Listen to Jordan's interview on episode 13 of Transformation Planet)

"I know"- those words almost killed me.

For years, in fact, most of my adult life, friends, family, and even concerned strangers would try and talk to me about my weight.

Die young, orphaned kids, bad health, diabetes, cancer, no career prospects, and on and on. "I know" was the only response I could muster. And I did know.

What I didn't realize until later was that what I should have said is "I don't know how to stop." My "I know" was really a misplaced cry for help.

I "knew" how to lose weight. For the most part, everyone knows. You simply expend more energy than you consume....every 5th grader knows that, right?

And I knew it too. I just needed to "do" it. Funny how far apart the "knowing" and "doing" were. All that and the results were less than nothing. Literally, I would try and GAIN weight.

The thing that worked for me is I had to have a really honest conversation with myself. Not necessarily about what foods I ate (although that was a part of the conversation), but about why all that knowledge couldn't produce any results. It boiled down to one simple phrase "If I could of, I would of."

I found myself able to exert enormous discipline and willpower in almost every other area of my life, except food. Try as I may, I could never fully tame the compulsion to keep eating things that I knew I shouldn't be in amounts that I shouldn't be eating.

I finally admitted that I would not be able to beat this, not on my own. That's when there was a new plan. Not one of me doing all the work, but more of following simple directions and letting go of the things that I thought I needed. Obviously, those were not working.

If you had told me that I could lose 230 pounds in a year by eating over 2000 calories a day I would have said "impossible."

This honesty and willingness to step outside of my own thinking is what has produced results for me.

Everybody is different. But I would encourage you to ask. If you find yourself time and time again not getting the results you want or expect, then have an honest conversation with yourself. I've been fortunate enough to meet several people on my own journey with lasting recovery. They all have varied food and exercise plans, but the one thing they all have in common is that they are completely honest with themselves.

People will sometimes approach me about just having "one of this" or "one of that" when it comes to food. "All things in moderation," they say. I almost always respond that I "am on a plan of abstinence, not moderation."

Moderation does not work for me, especially when it comes to food. One thing I had to learn about me is that I had to be abstinent from certain things with a happy heart.

For example- I love ice cream- Blue Bell ice cream is my absolute favorite. When I discovered ice cream was probably my #1 trigger food I determined I could not have it. Not a single bite, ever again- because if I started - I didn't know if I could stop. Over time I would get resentful- whenever I saw someone else eating it, or when a new flavor came out. I realized this resentment was poisoning my plan. I was looking at it the wrong way. What I was getting was much more valuable than what I was giving up.

Once I flipped that perspective- then I was ready to embrace a food plan that abstained from anything and everything that triggered me.

I just thought I'd throw out some thoughts tonight. Hope you are all well.
------
Thank you, Jordan!

Wow.

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Monday, March 26, 2018

March 26th, 2018 Room For You

March 26th, 2018 Room For You

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Today was a good day! Long day, though. Keeping tonight's edition short.

I posted last night about the accountability/support group I cofacilitate with Kathleen Miles and Jordan Burgess. Our Monday night group is full, but we have room for you in the Tuesday night conference call group! Tuesday night's weekly group call happens at 7pm Central/8pm Eastern. If you're interested, get ahold of me as soon as possible via email, text, or call--- transformation.road@gmail.com or 580-491-2228.

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Sunday, March 25, 2018

March 25th, 2018 Alternate Routes

March 25th, 2018 Alternate Routes

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

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You still have time to join our support team for the new 8-week session set to start tomorrow and Tuesday!

We have two different weekly group coaching/mentoring calls and a one on one package program for a more focused approached. All members share the Better Weigh secret Facebook page for ongoing daily accountability and support. Our regular group call 8-week session package is $120. The one on one program for 8-week is $200. Are you ready to have a team of support with the added bonus of structured coaching/mentoring? If you just said yes, email me: transformation.road@gmail.com or call/text 580-491-2228 and I'll get back to you asap.

Mom was very excited about getting out for our regular Sunday night get together. We dined at our favorite Mexican restaurant and I ordered my favorite fajita chicken tacos. If you're local to me, you'll not find these on the menu at Los Portalis. I order the ingredients separately, then assemble the tacos at the table. I know what I want and how I want it--and I get exactly what I need. A big part of successfully navigating restaurants, in my opinion, and experience, is not being afraid to ask specifically for what we want and need. 99% of the time, the server and kitchen will go out of their way to deliver. It's about turning roadblocks into alternate routes.

Mom and I visited Amber, KL, and baby Raegan tonight. Oh my--that little princess is the cutest little girl in the entire world. Her soft little cry just melts my heart.

It's been a good day.

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Saturday, March 24, 2018

March 24th, 2018 Wonderful

March 24th, 2018 Wonderful

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Today's You Plan Workshop was a success! I'm immensely grateful for the opportunity and feel incredibly blessed with the outcome. I'm looking forward to organizing more workshops in the near future!

I cannot thank Cindy enough for her incredible support today. She helped me organize the entire event! Here's something many may not know about her: She has her own one hundred pound weight loss and maintenance story. She shared her experience too during the "let's get to know one another" portion of the program. It was wonderful.

Gerri Helms--oh my, Gerri--what can I say...well, quite honestly, I can't say for sure I'd be here each day working my daily practice if not for her support over the years. Gerri is very experienced at organizing workshops literally all over the world--her help and guidance was and always is, invaluable.

I'm thrilled with how it all turned out today. The feedback I'm receiving from attendees is overwhelmingly positive. I couldn't ask for anything more.

I'm blessed and grateful.

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

Friday, March 23, 2018

March 23rd, 2018 Kind To You

March 23rd, 2018 Kind To You

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

If you're struggling, I hope you're being kind to you. I never understood that concept in previous weight loss attempts. If I struggled, I'd compound the challenge by calling myself every name in the book describing how I felt about my inability to "get it together."

When I was finally ready to move forward in a positive way, it started by picking myself up with positive thoughts and actions instead of holding me down with negative thoughts, energy, and actions.

Reaching an accord within, a forgiveness, and letting go of the guilt, shame, and every other negative thought and emotion isn't easy, but it's critically important for moving forward in a stable, positive way.

Something that can help further solidify this: Make "a list of you." This list should contain the answers to this question:

What are the things about me that do not change if I'm heavy or at a healthy weight, or for richer or poorer-- what are the core qualities of me that are constant, regardless of everything else?

The list should be populated with your likes, dislikes, things that bring you joy, things you're passionate about, things you're good at doing!!! Also, the things that make you a loving and compassionate person. These wonderful things we possess often get ignored when we're preoccupied with all of the negative thoughts and feelings surrounding relapse/regain.

For many of us, these are things we've ignored for years because we've been too busy, either focused on how good we feel about our success or how bad we feel about where we are at any given point along the way.

Embrace your core-- wrap it in a level of love and compassion you normally reserve for others...gift yourself that love, compassion, and acceptance-- and realize: Heavier, thinner-- successfully losing or struggling with relapse/regain--it truly never, EVER, changed any of these core qualities in you. 

You've always been an amazing person worthy of love and worthy of extending yourself the gift of extraordinary care and the improved health and vitality that comes with it.

I wish you all the best. I'm so happy you're here, where you are, moving forward with a resolve reserved for the most important things in your life.

I've been working today on getting ready for my workshop tomorrow. I'm looking forward to getting into it! If you're within driving distance, now's your last chance to register!
Click here to go directly to the EventBrite.com registration page!

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Keeping it short tonight--and working a little more on workshop prep!

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean





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