I woke up today feeling good about it being my 43rd birthday. I tried to go back into the archives to read how I was doing on my 42nd birthday, but I didn't blog a single page the last half of 2013. Honestly, I didn't need to read about it, I remember it well. I woke feeling depressed a year ago. I had gained back a big amount of weight and I was in the middle of the 'I've got to get a handle on this, now' cycle. That cycle was two or three days of doing well followed by two weeks of doing bad--and repeat.
Waking up today and feeling alive again felt incredible. A year ago, it felt improbable to ever feel like this again. When I looked in the mirror last year, all I could see was someone getting older and looking older--and worst of all, a man who was quickly losing hope for anything better. Honestly, it was mild to moderate depression.
I looked in the mirror this morning and staring back at me was a man who has a renewed spirit, new hope, dreams and most of all, a new attitude and perspective. My state of mind is one hundred eighty degrees what it was on this day a year ago. My whole world has opened.
Only I know how truly bad it became--because it hit levels I haven't shared with anyone. Suffice to say, this turnaround, in my opinion, is nothing short of a miracle. I am truly blessed.
I don't know what you see when you look at me--or what you think, and seriously--that isn't any of my business anyway, but I assure you--I am living, walking, breathing proof that a turnaround--even coming from the perspective of doom and gloom, is real, possible and within reach.
It's been six months since I gave up sugar and committed to a return to daily updates on this blog. It wasn't long after this decision when I decided to tweet a picture and calorie count of every calorie, every day. I'm so proud of the last six months for so many reasons. This six month period is by far, the most critically important of my entire journey. May 15th, 2014 alone--to me, is the single most important day of my entire journey. I call it "epiphany day."
"Epiphany Day" was the day I discovered the secret to my personal happiness and in that discovery, I learned that I had always been a good and worthy person regardless of my weight. On that day, I realized that my weight or any other variable would never again define my self worth and level of happiness. If you haven't gone back to May 15th to read the entry, I recommend it--and also May 19th when we explored it further.
I've received many gifts over the last six months and I'm very grateful. I'm blessed and absolutely lucky beyond my share.
It was a very busy day at work--several things needing my attention since I've made Friday another vacation day. I didn't mind the busy day because I had something wonderful to look forward to later! I enjoyed this evening with Heather and I'll spend tomorrow with her too, before returning home for a busy weekend, capped by a birthday celebration with family in Stillwater on Sunday.
We talked about my birthday on my radio show this morning. Being sugar free presents an obvious situation if you're accustomed to the traditional birthday cake type thing. Honestly, I couldn't care less about a cake. And I certainly wouldn't trade my life and freedom for a piece. I was okay with skipping the cake until a local bakery stepped in and offered sugar free chocolate muffins. I picked up a bag of these muffins sweetened with unsweetened applesauce and stevia. The bakery doesn't normally bake and sell sugar free items--but now, they're considering adding some things like this! I picked up the muffins and was asked for my honest feedback so they could tweak the recipe if needed. I ordered a dozen sugar free cupcakes for the Sunday get together in Stillwater and even offered the stevia from my supply of Pyure Brands Organic Stevia. It'll be experimental, for sure--and if the chocolate muffins are any indication, the cupcakes will be fantastic!
It's been a really good birthday! Thank you to each and every one of my facebook friends who took the time to leave a happy birthday wish on my Facebook wall. If we're not friends on Facebook--friend request me!! You'll find me here: www.facebook.com/seananderson505
My Tweets today:
Good morning. Sugar free hazelnut flavored creamer. 2 cups and not a drop less! 30CX2=60 cal. pic.twitter.com/KlUEMRBrLX
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 23, 2014
B-Day breakfast! Cheese omelet w/2 whole eggs, 2 whites- swiss and mozzarella. 1/2 Anjou pear, yellow apple. 424 cal. pic.twitter.com/tl7mJEsw4O
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 23, 2014
Guacamole, lettuce and mild taco sauce tostadas with a medium Anjou pear. 392 cal. pic.twitter.com/hpwpqspG5C
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 23, 2014
Chips, guacamole and salsa! 172 cal. pic.twitter.com/uC0eCwrjkv
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 24, 2014
Crispy steak (6oz) fajita tacos with peppers, onions and sour cream. 2 bites of beans. 570 cal. #birthdaydinner pic.twitter.com/lbJl2MjsWD
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 24, 2014
Chocolate flavored sugar free creamer (1.5 teaspoons). 22 cal. pic.twitter.com/LA3448KcdD
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 24, 2014
A local bakery, hearing I am sugar free, made sugar free choc. muffins! W/unsweetened apple sauce & stevia. 59 cal pic.twitter.com/gmMKdOPi09
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 24, 2014
Another. 22 calories. #lastfoodofday or should it be #lastcoffeeofday I'm off work tomorrow! #birthdayweekend ;) pic.twitter.com/EfkubZwbqV
— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) October 24, 2014
Thank you for reading and your incredible support,
Strength,
Sean
