Since our last edition, I've maintained the integrity of my food plan boundaries, I've remained refined sugar-free, I've met or exceeded my daily water goal, and I've stayed well connected with exceptional support.
The challenges mom is facing right now are taking a toll on her. She remains in the hospital. Just today, they moved her from the critical care unit to a regular room. Four things are happening: A bad UTI, too much co2 in her lungs, reduced kidney function, and an excessive buildup of digoxin (heart medication) in her system. Three of these four things can and often create hallucinations, severe brain fog, and dementia-like symptoms. Mom isn't herself right now. She's angry, combative, non-cooperative, and mostly, she's scared because she doesn't understand what's going on. Her frustration level came out tonight when she was trying to formulate words and couldn't. She screamed, "I can't speak!!" Keep in mind, I can count on two hands how many times in my life I've heard my mom scream.
I've never seen her like this. She's recently ripped out her IV, tried to rip out other things attached to her, and she's thrown her breakfast across the room. This isn't her. I sincerely hope and pray it isn't dementia. As soon as these issues clear, she may very well go back to being her regular self. I've been handling things in a fairly calm way until she started begging and pleading for me not to leave her bedside. That was almost too much. It was again earlier tonight.
The doctor said she'll remain hospitalized until her kidney function numbers get back into an acceptable range. Hopefully, the treatments they're following for the other three things start making a profound positive impact as well.
Your prayers, thoughts, positive energy--whatever you can spare, is greatly appreciated.
As for me, I'm getting by. I'm doing my best to take good care. I'm definitely not getting enough sleep, my meal plan schedule is tilted most days, and I'm feeling emotionally vulnerable most of the time. My intentional actions in response to all this have been to stay in even more contact with incredible support friends, personally preparing all of my meals (I don't know why--but for whatever reason, the weighing and measuring everything gives me some kind of secure feeling--hence the temporary hold on dining out), and taking some time off from work. I must say, my colleagues at the radio station have been super-supportive--and the owner of the company has been above and beyond generous with the time I've needed to take care of things in order to be there for mom and to be here for me, too.
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| A fairly recent photo of mom and me |
In the meantime, I'll spend a little more time devoted to my morning foundational routine of prayer, meditation, gratitude, positive visualizations, and positive affirmations--and I'll do my best to remain extra diligent in my daily practice of things that help keep me well.
Do you own an "I'm Choosing Change" wristband? I wear mine daily as a constant reminder of why my daily practice of things is important. I'm not alone, either. This powerful message is worn on the wrists of people in a dozen states, maybe more, I haven't counted--but it's up there!! From New York to California and from Canada all the way to Scotland, they're out there! For me, it's simply a daily reminder to be open, willing, mindful, to pause, and to be intentional. If I'm not those things, I get stuck at the line of least resistance and back there is where the old patterns and behaviors thrive. Your order includes priority shipping so you'll get it quickly! Here's the link to order yours right now: https://imchoosingchange.com/product/wristband/
My website shares a phone number with my podcast, Transformation Planet, and it's always available for you! Have a question? Want to share your story? Leave a voicemail or Text me! 580-491-2228 I'll text you back!
Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Practice, peace, and calm,
Sean
My website: www.imchoosingchange.com
If you're interested in connecting via social media:
I accept friend requests on MyFitnessPal. My daily food logging diary is set to public.
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Also--I'd love you to subscribe to my podcast Transformation Planet! You can find it in Apple Podcasts, in the Google Play store for Android, and listed wherever you find your favorite podcasts! If you haven't listened before, you'll find 20 episodes waiting for you!
Questions or comments? Send an email! transformation.road@gmail.com
I'm hoping and praying for the best for your Mom.
ReplyDeletePraying and sending loving karma to you and your mom. I'm so sorry for your whole family. Stay strong.
ReplyDeletesean, thinking of you and especially your mom during this very difficult time. xxxxx Dawn
ReplyDelete