Day 492
Satisfied? Yes and No, Plus—Weigh Day Eve Ramblings
My strong point over the last 492 days has been staying within my calorie budget. I starting treating my calories like cash from Day 1. It was my daily allotment from the “Calorie Bank and Trust,” mine to spend however I wish. When the calories are gone, they're gone. This bank doesn't have an ATM anywhere, so I seriously have to budget those allotted dollars, uh--calories, so they'll last me all day and evening. This mental game has been very effective for me. I should have developed something similar along the lines of weight training---But there I go again, expressing regret over where I could have been physically had I only started weight training sooner. Am I ever satisfied? Well, yes and no. Yes, I'm happy that I weigh less now than what I did as a fifteen year old. And no, because I know the potential that lies within this frame holds the key to the most dramatic transformation possible.
I try not to waste too much time obsessing on coulda, shoulda, woulda's, there's nothing positive in that way of thinking. But I share these feelings anyway, because I know that someday someone might be starting their own similar journey, and they may read. My hope is that they don't do what I did, they do it better—improve upon what we've accomplished, and realize that weight training is a vital component to our overall goal, something that should be incorporated from an early stage. What matters for me now is this: I'm doing it. I'll catch up, I'm fine. I feel great. And the real exciting part about this transformation? It's far from over.
I started the morning with my “mini-workout” in the living room floor. I rushed through, only 15 minutes worth today, but it was a good start to what would be a challenging Tuesday. I enjoyed steel cut oats for breakfast, then packed a banana and an apple for the trip to work. My day was interrupted with some unexpected family issues that completely and understandably disrupted my groove. By the time 7:30pm rolled around I was sitting at a low 575 calories for the day, total---and no additional workout, yet.
I prepared a strange dinner, but it was good. I resisted the temptation to “just grab something,” opting instead for a big grilled chicken breast and a healthy portion of steel cut oats with banana slices—both prepared at home. It was flat out stick to your ribs kind of food, which is fine, as long as it doesn’t attach itself to my rear-end, we’re good. I was still short on my calorie budget today. Dinner only took me to 1100, then two hours later I bumped it to 1450 with a three whole egg omelet with extra cheese. I don’t like eating for the sake of pushing my calories up, and since it was getting horribly late, and I still hadn’t workout out…I fell short of my intended goal of 1800. I must adjust my approach during the morning and day. I need to time my calories and hit certain calorie levels earlier, so I’m not scrambling to get the calories in my body late in the evening. Thank you for the wonderful suggestions on this topic!
The workout tonight was late and severely rushed. I really let the circumstances of the day effect my schedule in a really bad way. I know I’ve done it way too much, but considering what time I have to get up during the week, I have no business working out at 11:30pm. That’s crazy.
Tomorrow is weigh day! Plus tomorrow afternoon I’ll be talking to that reporter from the Tulsa World, wish me luck for a good one on both of these events. It’ll be a great day, I just know it will! I’m anxious to see what two weeks of an elevated workout schedule and increased calories will do for me on the scale. I can’t wait to report my results. I’m still holding on to that number going down. I have more fat to lose---I mean, take a close look my friend, yeah…we have work to do. It will be strange to arrive at the point where I’m actually wanting the scale to move the other way, a result of muscle gain. I still want the scale to go down from fat loss, but we’re not far from that magical point where gains are celebrated with measurements and healthy strength and definition. We’re excitingly close to that point.
I received another wonderful e-mail weight loss update from a reader--- I love occasionally sharing these because they inspire all of us---and they just make me happy. I’m so happy for Brenda, she’s seriously breaking free with an attitude and clarity unlike any other attempt in her life. Her transformation will be jaw-dropping proof that yes; this can be done—even if you’ve struggled for years. Never give up hope my friend---a wonderful future of freedom awaits! Brenda writes: Hey Sean, I just wanted to let you know that I weighed in this morning and I am down another 7.5 pounds! That's 28 pounds total. It feels SO good! Thanks for all your inspiration. I wouldn't be here without you. I have 148 pounds to go so I will need you to keep inspiring me... no pressure. --Brenda
Thank you for reading. I’m so grateful for the outpouring of support shown me along this road. In the beginning I didn’t realize how important this diary would become to my development and understanding of myself and my habits. And it never ceases to amaze me when someone says they’ve read every single day and it's important to them too. Even my boring—long winded-rambling parts? Well, bless you my friend! I can’t thank you enough. I sincerely hope that my experiences help you with yours. Goodnight and…
Good Choices,
Sean
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Day 491 Grab Ahold--A Message For Struggling Friends and The Broken Cycle of Obesity
Day 491
Grab Ahold—A Message For Struggling Friends and The Broken Cycle of Obesity
Mondays are either really slow or really busy, there's usually no in between around here. Today was busy. I started the day with squats, push ups, and sit ups---enjoyed breakfast, a couple of whole eggs and a banana...and started drinking coffee. I was ready to roll! I can handle this pre-work exercise. It's not the only workout of the day, just a warm-up to my day. And seriously, it's only about twenty minutes, not a big deal. I should have started doing this a while back! I guess I've always had to “go” workout...to the trail, or the YMCA, and now the fitness room downstairs. Rarely would I stay in the house to workout, except for Sweatin' To The Oldies, but Melissa has shown me brutal exercises---and by “brutal,” I mean good—that do not even require me to put on shoes.
Where was I? Oh yeah...Busy Monday. I powered through and did some good work. I was proud of our team today. We made some good radio indeed. I honestly didn't feel like it, but we rose to the occasion anyway. It's the same when we struggle to get that exercise done. I can't tell you how many times I just haven't been in the mood to workout, but did anyway—and felt great because of the effort. I haven't been perfect, many times I've postponed or just flat out skipped working out, but there's never really a good reason. Working out in some form or fashion can only be a positive thing. It's a mood changer, lifter...those endorphins are powerful little things!
I've been thinking today about those friends that I know are struggling these days. They're struggling with their journey, and some are slowly losing their grip—others have completely lost their grip. And I really want to reach out to each one and explain to them that I understand. The struggle of being over 500 pounds for so long, with all of the ill effects of such enormous weight, wasn't enough to motivate me to change for nearly two decades. And just when I thought I was really changing, I'd slowly let it slip away---back into my 500 pound existence. I did that over and over until 491 days ago. So what changed?
I knew that this pattern would eventually leave me without any options, only an early death. After analyzing my self-destructive weight loss patterns, I realized that I never made it important enough. I never gave it the importance level it deserved. It was way too easy to rationalize bad choices with a really low importance level. Oh, it was life or death, but I never treated it that way until this time. Why didn't I? Because I don't like dramatics. I'm easy...hey, it's no big deal, right? YES, it is a very big deal. I've been called fanatical and obsessive about my calorie budget many times, but you know what else they can call me? Successful. If looking at my calorie budget like a life or death limit is considered fanatical and obsessive, then fine by me. I failed every other time because I wasn't. I was easy---I was full of excuses and rationalizations for why I couldn't or shouldn't stick to my plan. If you want success, you really have to be willing to get seriously dramatic with yourself and even a little fanatical and obsessive. This is too important. And guys, come on---this is no time to have a macho attitude. Let's get real and make this happen. It'll set you free.
I've written better blogs about this topic before. If you're struggling or not, I invite you to read the archives. It's by no means perfect---but I promise you this...the “iron clad decision” and “steel curtain zone” is a constant theme. Make that iron clad decision to lose the weight once and for all---and then defend that decision with a steel curtain zone against any emotion, circumstance, person, place, or thing that you feel is threatening. Your biggest threat is you. That's right, you're sleeping with the enemy. But when you become committed to this journey in every way, and that steel curtain zone is activated, you become a wonderful ally to yourself. Success along the way motivates for even greater results—and soon, you're on day 491.
Amber travels back to school in the morning and I know that she's going back with a renewed resolve about her. It doesn't take long in talking to her about her weight for her emotions to show in a raw fashion. Look what I've helped create. Through my horrible example all of these years, I've created another me. She has many identical experiences that I endured as a fat child, the painful ones—and she's stopping it right now. This is it. She's going to break free at 20 years old, not 37 and 38 like her dad is doing. Twenty years old. Her future kids will never know her as a morbidly obese person. This is the only thought that makes me feel better. This cycle of obesity ends right here and right now.
Thank you for reading. Your support is sincerely appreciated. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Grab Ahold—A Message For Struggling Friends and The Broken Cycle of Obesity
Mondays are either really slow or really busy, there's usually no in between around here. Today was busy. I started the day with squats, push ups, and sit ups---enjoyed breakfast, a couple of whole eggs and a banana...and started drinking coffee. I was ready to roll! I can handle this pre-work exercise. It's not the only workout of the day, just a warm-up to my day. And seriously, it's only about twenty minutes, not a big deal. I should have started doing this a while back! I guess I've always had to “go” workout...to the trail, or the YMCA, and now the fitness room downstairs. Rarely would I stay in the house to workout, except for Sweatin' To The Oldies, but Melissa has shown me brutal exercises---and by “brutal,” I mean good—that do not even require me to put on shoes.
Where was I? Oh yeah...Busy Monday. I powered through and did some good work. I was proud of our team today. We made some good radio indeed. I honestly didn't feel like it, but we rose to the occasion anyway. It's the same when we struggle to get that exercise done. I can't tell you how many times I just haven't been in the mood to workout, but did anyway—and felt great because of the effort. I haven't been perfect, many times I've postponed or just flat out skipped working out, but there's never really a good reason. Working out in some form or fashion can only be a positive thing. It's a mood changer, lifter...those endorphins are powerful little things!
I've been thinking today about those friends that I know are struggling these days. They're struggling with their journey, and some are slowly losing their grip—others have completely lost their grip. And I really want to reach out to each one and explain to them that I understand. The struggle of being over 500 pounds for so long, with all of the ill effects of such enormous weight, wasn't enough to motivate me to change for nearly two decades. And just when I thought I was really changing, I'd slowly let it slip away---back into my 500 pound existence. I did that over and over until 491 days ago. So what changed?
I knew that this pattern would eventually leave me without any options, only an early death. After analyzing my self-destructive weight loss patterns, I realized that I never made it important enough. I never gave it the importance level it deserved. It was way too easy to rationalize bad choices with a really low importance level. Oh, it was life or death, but I never treated it that way until this time. Why didn't I? Because I don't like dramatics. I'm easy...hey, it's no big deal, right? YES, it is a very big deal. I've been called fanatical and obsessive about my calorie budget many times, but you know what else they can call me? Successful. If looking at my calorie budget like a life or death limit is considered fanatical and obsessive, then fine by me. I failed every other time because I wasn't. I was easy---I was full of excuses and rationalizations for why I couldn't or shouldn't stick to my plan. If you want success, you really have to be willing to get seriously dramatic with yourself and even a little fanatical and obsessive. This is too important. And guys, come on---this is no time to have a macho attitude. Let's get real and make this happen. It'll set you free.
I've written better blogs about this topic before. If you're struggling or not, I invite you to read the archives. It's by no means perfect---but I promise you this...the “iron clad decision” and “steel curtain zone” is a constant theme. Make that iron clad decision to lose the weight once and for all---and then defend that decision with a steel curtain zone against any emotion, circumstance, person, place, or thing that you feel is threatening. Your biggest threat is you. That's right, you're sleeping with the enemy. But when you become committed to this journey in every way, and that steel curtain zone is activated, you become a wonderful ally to yourself. Success along the way motivates for even greater results—and soon, you're on day 491.
Amber travels back to school in the morning and I know that she's going back with a renewed resolve about her. It doesn't take long in talking to her about her weight for her emotions to show in a raw fashion. Look what I've helped create. Through my horrible example all of these years, I've created another me. She has many identical experiences that I endured as a fat child, the painful ones—and she's stopping it right now. This is it. She's going to break free at 20 years old, not 37 and 38 like her dad is doing. Twenty years old. Her future kids will never know her as a morbidly obese person. This is the only thought that makes me feel better. This cycle of obesity ends right here and right now.
Thank you for reading. Your support is sincerely appreciated. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Monday, January 18, 2010
Day 490 No Desire To Let Go and The Undefined Finish Line
Day 490
No Desire To Let Go and The Undefined Finish Line
I’m excited to be where I am physically. I look in the mirror and sometimes it’s like looking at a stranger. I wonder if my brain will ever catch up with my body and accept that I’m smaller now? That’s a really good question.
Today was filled with writing, planning, cleaning, and preparing. I stayed busy, because when I don’t, that’s when it can get tough. I have many different personal issues crowding in on me these days and it’s sometimes difficult to shield my mission from the emotions that always derailed me before. But I’m doing it. I’ve said from the very beginning, “no emotion, no circumstance, person, place, or thing will steal this away from me.” They can’t. I refuse to let go. It was so easy to let go in the past because I really had a desire to do it anyway, then the first excuse that came along…I’d jump on it. That’s the big difference these days. I don’t have the desire to let go, in fact, it’s exactly the opposite. Now that I’ve experienced significant weight loss, I wouldn’t trade it for all the ice cream in the world.
I enjoyed a movie with Amber this afternoon, with the understanding that we would go workout together afterward, and then we fell asleep. By the time we woke up, it was time for Amber to travel over to her mom’s house for their evening plans. I was left to workout solo again tonight. This time I stayed in the apartment. I’ve decided that there is no reason that I can’t do some of these movements inside and before work of a morning. I love the way I feel after doing them---and it always makes me have a better day, so enough said. Let’s do it!
I’m making this a short post today. The one thing I’m taking from today? I’m staying positive, I’m staying on track, and I will get where I’m headed. These challenges we face, they’re not different than any number of people face everyday. We have many issues in common with many people. The difference is in how each person handles the circumstances and emotions.
I’m in the home stretch my friend. As I approach the “finish line,” that imaginary line isn’t well defined. Is it 230? Or is that too small considering my body fat percentage of 16.5%? So do I stop measuring my success by pounds lost? I have fat to lose, no question. But if weight training adds muscle and that adds good pounds---then at a point I may have to find another way of measuring my success. I’ve pretty much decided that I will not worry about all of those details. I’ll do as Melissa says---weight train and 1800 calories with cardio mixed in too. I will not let the scale make or break how I feel about my success. That’s ridiculous, but it’s all I’ve known so far.
Thank you for reading. Goodnight and…
Good Choices,
Sean
No Desire To Let Go and The Undefined Finish Line
I’m excited to be where I am physically. I look in the mirror and sometimes it’s like looking at a stranger. I wonder if my brain will ever catch up with my body and accept that I’m smaller now? That’s a really good question.
Today was filled with writing, planning, cleaning, and preparing. I stayed busy, because when I don’t, that’s when it can get tough. I have many different personal issues crowding in on me these days and it’s sometimes difficult to shield my mission from the emotions that always derailed me before. But I’m doing it. I’ve said from the very beginning, “no emotion, no circumstance, person, place, or thing will steal this away from me.” They can’t. I refuse to let go. It was so easy to let go in the past because I really had a desire to do it anyway, then the first excuse that came along…I’d jump on it. That’s the big difference these days. I don’t have the desire to let go, in fact, it’s exactly the opposite. Now that I’ve experienced significant weight loss, I wouldn’t trade it for all the ice cream in the world.
I enjoyed a movie with Amber this afternoon, with the understanding that we would go workout together afterward, and then we fell asleep. By the time we woke up, it was time for Amber to travel over to her mom’s house for their evening plans. I was left to workout solo again tonight. This time I stayed in the apartment. I’ve decided that there is no reason that I can’t do some of these movements inside and before work of a morning. I love the way I feel after doing them---and it always makes me have a better day, so enough said. Let’s do it!
I’m making this a short post today. The one thing I’m taking from today? I’m staying positive, I’m staying on track, and I will get where I’m headed. These challenges we face, they’re not different than any number of people face everyday. We have many issues in common with many people. The difference is in how each person handles the circumstances and emotions.
I’m in the home stretch my friend. As I approach the “finish line,” that imaginary line isn’t well defined. Is it 230? Or is that too small considering my body fat percentage of 16.5%? So do I stop measuring my success by pounds lost? I have fat to lose, no question. But if weight training adds muscle and that adds good pounds---then at a point I may have to find another way of measuring my success. I’ve pretty much decided that I will not worry about all of those details. I’ll do as Melissa says---weight train and 1800 calories with cardio mixed in too. I will not let the scale make or break how I feel about my success. That’s ridiculous, but it’s all I’ve known so far.
Thank you for reading. Goodnight and…
Good Choices,
Sean
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Day 489 Happy Tears From Bobbi and Come What May-I Will Not Be Broken
Day 489
Happy Tears From Bobbi and Come What May-I Will Not Be Broken
I have many friends that are on this weight loss road. Just as I send out my weigh day updates, they too send me their weigh-in results. I started my Saturday morning by finding an e-mail from someone I didn't know was reading this blog until just a few weeks ago. Turns out she's been reading for some time, and when she started she went back in the archives and read every single entry. I don't have any way of knowing who's reading and what they've read, let alone what they're getting out of these writings. I just share what I'm experiencing—put it out there in a raw and honest form, and I learn about myself in the process.
This blog has been and continues to be therapy for me. It may not be perfect, but it has empowered me, enlightened me, given me strength and hope to carry on each and every day. And when I start my day by reading an e-mail like the one below, it makes it all the more special to me. Bobbi doesn't blog publicly. She keeps a private diary everyday along her weight loss journey and she reads. She reads my blog and many others. If you're a fellow weight loss blogger, she may have read yours too. She's given me permission to share this:
Sean, I weighed today and I'm down another five pounds! I just stepped on the scale and started crying because it's never worked for me. I'm so happy. For the first time in my life I'm losing weight (47 pounds so far---over 100 to go). Thank you for showing me that it doesn't have to be hard. I read you everyday and more often than not, your blog hits me right between the eyes. I've even had my husband read your blog and he's starting to understand that he could do this too. I know you've told me that it's all me doing this, and I understand what you're saying, but I hope you know what an inspiration you've been . I started reading from day one and couldn't stop. Thank you for sharing your story. ---Bobbi and David in New York.
Bobbi, I know you reluctantly gave me permission to print that, but your success inspires others too. Your transformation continues to be and will always be something that deserves your pride. And oh by the way---it's all you! Your e-mail this morning gave me strength and inspiration. Thank you!
When I'm not feeling 100%, I just have to read e-mails and comments like that—-and it makes me realize how important it is to power through emotions and circumstances with unbreakable resolve. I've really had to put up my steel curtain zone a bunch lately. The stress and emotion that I'm experiencing of late is trying it's best to break me. Not smoking makes me feel incredible, but I've just now noticed how much I relied on those nasty things to calm my nerves and help me cope. I can't give in, I can't give up---I'm a non-smoker, I'm a non-smoker. I have to continuously say that. Quitting smoking, in my opinion, is ten times harder than what I've done with weight loss. I can eat food in a healthy and responsible way, I can't smoke in a healthy and responsible way. They're different animals for sure—-but the mental power to stay focused is identical to this weight loss road—I mustn't forget.
I started the day preparing omelets for everybody. I love making them and everyone loves eating them, well, most everyone. The calorie value is so wonderful in an egg white omelet, it's a hard habit to not over do. I must make an effort to eat more steel cut oats of a morning! Out of ten days, I probably eat the oats once or twice. I'm a creature of habit I guess. Aren't we all?
I spent fifty calories on gum today and over a hundred on coffee creamer. Hmmm. I even enjoyed a half a cup of natural orange juice. The juice was really sweet and good, I wish it wasn't so calorie dense. But it's good for me right? I know it is, so I'm cool with that. And since Melissa upped my calorie to 1800, I have a little more room for this kind of thing. I have struggled a few days to hit the 1800. I was so comfortable with my 1500 calorie pace, I sometimes find myself hunting for more calories late. That may not be what Melissa intended me to do. I need to watch that. I need to add those extra calories throughout the day, preferably an hour after a good workout, maybe some right before. I must make sure this extra “fuel” is being used most efficiently.
My sleep schedule has always been in need of improvement. It's always been an issue along this road...and it remains. We don't have to re-hash how important proper rest is to this journey---it's understood. The body needs rest to renew itself. The body needs rest to run at optimum levels and work as efficiently as possible. I get that. I do. But still I struggle with that element. You know what it is don't you? It's self-discipline. If I applied the same level of importance to my sleep schedule as I do my calorie budget---we wouldn't be talking about this issue. Importance level...where is my importance level on sleep? Obviously not high enough. I continue to work on that.
My workout today was good. Not great. I planned on doing it with Amber, but our schedules just didn't mesh. Amber is awesome and I can't wait to show her what I've learned in the strength training exercise department. I love how a good non-cardio workout still gets the heart to pumping. Working the muscles still gets me pumped and my heart working, it's very noticeable. I've had to lay off some things temporarily because I hurt my elbow of my left arm. I don't know if I hyper-extended it or what, but it has really hurt the last few days. I'm happy to report it's feeling so much better now. Melissa showed me proper technique/form to make sure I don't do that again! I'm such a novice in the strength training arena and that stuff can be dangerous. My advice? Listen to people that know better and follow their instructions!! That's what I'm doing.
I sincerely appreciate you reading and offering your support. This post marks my 500th. I know it's only Day 489, but several times along the way I posted seperate blogs for videos and pictures. 500, that's a bunch, I'm proud. This journey rolls on everyday and the best is yet to come. Wow...that's exciting, because it's been really incredible so far. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Happy Tears From Bobbi and Come What May-I Will Not Be Broken
I have many friends that are on this weight loss road. Just as I send out my weigh day updates, they too send me their weigh-in results. I started my Saturday morning by finding an e-mail from someone I didn't know was reading this blog until just a few weeks ago. Turns out she's been reading for some time, and when she started she went back in the archives and read every single entry. I don't have any way of knowing who's reading and what they've read, let alone what they're getting out of these writings. I just share what I'm experiencing—put it out there in a raw and honest form, and I learn about myself in the process.
This blog has been and continues to be therapy for me. It may not be perfect, but it has empowered me, enlightened me, given me strength and hope to carry on each and every day. And when I start my day by reading an e-mail like the one below, it makes it all the more special to me. Bobbi doesn't blog publicly. She keeps a private diary everyday along her weight loss journey and she reads. She reads my blog and many others. If you're a fellow weight loss blogger, she may have read yours too. She's given me permission to share this:
Sean, I weighed today and I'm down another five pounds! I just stepped on the scale and started crying because it's never worked for me. I'm so happy. For the first time in my life I'm losing weight (47 pounds so far---over 100 to go). Thank you for showing me that it doesn't have to be hard. I read you everyday and more often than not, your blog hits me right between the eyes. I've even had my husband read your blog and he's starting to understand that he could do this too. I know you've told me that it's all me doing this, and I understand what you're saying, but I hope you know what an inspiration you've been . I started reading from day one and couldn't stop. Thank you for sharing your story. ---Bobbi and David in New York.
Bobbi, I know you reluctantly gave me permission to print that, but your success inspires others too. Your transformation continues to be and will always be something that deserves your pride. And oh by the way---it's all you! Your e-mail this morning gave me strength and inspiration. Thank you!
When I'm not feeling 100%, I just have to read e-mails and comments like that—-and it makes me realize how important it is to power through emotions and circumstances with unbreakable resolve. I've really had to put up my steel curtain zone a bunch lately. The stress and emotion that I'm experiencing of late is trying it's best to break me. Not smoking makes me feel incredible, but I've just now noticed how much I relied on those nasty things to calm my nerves and help me cope. I can't give in, I can't give up---I'm a non-smoker, I'm a non-smoker. I have to continuously say that. Quitting smoking, in my opinion, is ten times harder than what I've done with weight loss. I can eat food in a healthy and responsible way, I can't smoke in a healthy and responsible way. They're different animals for sure—-but the mental power to stay focused is identical to this weight loss road—I mustn't forget.
I started the day preparing omelets for everybody. I love making them and everyone loves eating them, well, most everyone. The calorie value is so wonderful in an egg white omelet, it's a hard habit to not over do. I must make an effort to eat more steel cut oats of a morning! Out of ten days, I probably eat the oats once or twice. I'm a creature of habit I guess. Aren't we all?
I spent fifty calories on gum today and over a hundred on coffee creamer. Hmmm. I even enjoyed a half a cup of natural orange juice. The juice was really sweet and good, I wish it wasn't so calorie dense. But it's good for me right? I know it is, so I'm cool with that. And since Melissa upped my calorie to 1800, I have a little more room for this kind of thing. I have struggled a few days to hit the 1800. I was so comfortable with my 1500 calorie pace, I sometimes find myself hunting for more calories late. That may not be what Melissa intended me to do. I need to watch that. I need to add those extra calories throughout the day, preferably an hour after a good workout, maybe some right before. I must make sure this extra “fuel” is being used most efficiently.
My sleep schedule has always been in need of improvement. It's always been an issue along this road...and it remains. We don't have to re-hash how important proper rest is to this journey---it's understood. The body needs rest to renew itself. The body needs rest to run at optimum levels and work as efficiently as possible. I get that. I do. But still I struggle with that element. You know what it is don't you? It's self-discipline. If I applied the same level of importance to my sleep schedule as I do my calorie budget---we wouldn't be talking about this issue. Importance level...where is my importance level on sleep? Obviously not high enough. I continue to work on that.
My workout today was good. Not great. I planned on doing it with Amber, but our schedules just didn't mesh. Amber is awesome and I can't wait to show her what I've learned in the strength training exercise department. I love how a good non-cardio workout still gets the heart to pumping. Working the muscles still gets me pumped and my heart working, it's very noticeable. I've had to lay off some things temporarily because I hurt my elbow of my left arm. I don't know if I hyper-extended it or what, but it has really hurt the last few days. I'm happy to report it's feeling so much better now. Melissa showed me proper technique/form to make sure I don't do that again! I'm such a novice in the strength training arena and that stuff can be dangerous. My advice? Listen to people that know better and follow their instructions!! That's what I'm doing.
I sincerely appreciate you reading and offering your support. This post marks my 500th. I know it's only Day 489, but several times along the way I posted seperate blogs for videos and pictures. 500, that's a bunch, I'm proud. This journey rolls on everyday and the best is yet to come. Wow...that's exciting, because it's been really incredible so far. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Day 488 Not Everything---But Too Much To Go Back and Simple Getting Started Advice
Day 488
Not Everything—But Too Much To Go Back and Simple Getting Started Advice
Compared to yesterday morning, this mornings rise at 4:10am would be considered sleeping late. I jumped up with plenty to accomplish before I found the seat behind the microphone at 6am. I wanted a workout enjoyed and a blog page written, oh---and a shower, breakfast, and getting dressed. Oh my...maybe I should have jumped up earlier! I was able to get it done with about five minutes to spare. I cut it a little too close today. But I really like working out before work. It energizes me like crazy! It sets the tone for a wonderful day. It wasn't the longest workout but it was concentrated and good. I'm really digging the sit ups. I never thought I'd say that, but really...those things kill my abs---I love it! I just love that I can actually feel abs under there!! That's really thrilling for me.
A friend asked a question that I've been asked many times by many people, usually by someone who has also lost a considerable amount of weight. The question? Do you ever fear going back? Gaining it all back? My simple answer is: NO. Melissa Walden told me a long time ago, after a “Lose To Win” seminar, “you know too much to ever go back!” And it really made sense to me. I've made peace with food. I've accepted that food is my friend—not my enemy. Food is a friend that I don't want to abuse any longer. Because when you start abusing a friend, eventually they're not a friend anymore. I'm not perfect, I don't “eat clean” by any stretch of the imagination. My issues with overeating have been resolved and right now that's more important to me than anything. Could my choices improve? Of course! Are you kidding? But from where I came, everything has improved, and now that I have a taste of this freedom---I'm never going back. I don't know everything, but I do know enough to know that I can confidently move forward without fear of losing this freedom. I'll make my life all about sharing this journey to freedom---and that positive message will constantly remind me of where I've been and where I'm headed. No, I'm never going back.
Every now and then someone ask me to give them advice on how to get started. My advice reflects my philosophy that change must be natural and gradual to take a firm hold in our brains. The phrase "nothing is off limits," completely gets under some people's skin---and I understand why, but realize that this approach is exactly what has transformed me from a 505 pound food addict mess of a man to where I am today. The positive from this change is far greater than the negative of some of my food choices. You have to start somewhere and for me it had to be a natural progression of good choices, or better choices--focusing on amounts-portion control--rather than prohibiting "bad" foods. My advice is always heavy on the mental aspects, after all, they are the most important elements of success along this road. Instead of re-writing what I tell them—I'll just share this excerpt from Day 232 titled “Required Mental Exercises:”
Forget every rule you thought was iron clad about losing weight.
Admit to yourself that you don't know it all, because someone who knows it all can't learn effectively. Have you ever heard someone say “you can't change him, he's set in his ways.” Be open to a “new,” simple approach to weight loss that really isn't new at all.
Wipe from your mind the idea that some foods are forbidden.
Do some really deep internal self-counseling to discover your “motivating thoughts.” Why do you want to lose weight and feel great? Develop that list and defend it from your old habits at all cost.
Realize that food is not the enemy, you have been your own worst enemy.
Let go of any blame for your obesity that you have ever placed on someone or something.
Admit that you are the one in charge of you. And since that is true, you're completely responsible for your habits, good and bad.
Stop being the victim. Empower yourself to rise above your circumstances instead of allowing yourself to stay chained to them in a depressing existence.
Here's a BIG one: Be 100% completely HONEST with yourself. Stop telling yourself lies. Lies come in the form of excuses and rationalizations. Be honest about them and you'll start to recognize them every time they pop out of your mouth or brain. Stop rationalizing bad choices.
Defeat excuses at every turn. Stop thinking of all the reasons why you'll never be able to do this, instead think of all the wonderful reasons to do this and never give up.
Don't “let yourself off the hook.” Don't say “I have time to do this later, I'll start next week, or next month, or after the holidays, or after we get past all of the birthdays coming up...right now, let's eat!” Maybe you don't have time. I let myself off the hook for over twenty years. If your transformation is important to you, don't let yourself off the hook.
Understand that every action has a consequence, good or bad. Shoot for the good ones.
When you're alone, that's when you have to police yourself extra. Almost every weight loss attempt in my past has ended with me binging alone. Don't let yourself down like that. Take pride in your resolve.
Make sure to remind yourself that there isn't a food you can't enjoy at one time or another. You may not have the calories for that cheesecake today, but find a way to work it in sometime soon.
Understand that it will get easier. But only if you put forth a consistent positive effort.
I'm sure there are plenty more spread throughout this journey. Go back and read from Day 1.
Remember, I'm not an expert. I'm just a guy who's been through this stuff my entire life. I was over 500 pounds for the majority of my adult life, until 232 days ago. These things I share are simply breakthrough thoughts and principles I've discovered along the way. If you're skeptical, then hide and watch what I do. Trust me, this is only the beginning of this journey for me. If you stopped reading this blog today and then come back in a few months, you will find me below 300 for the first time since age 16. The most important advice I can give anyone is: Don't make it complicated. Keep it simple! Calories in vs. Calories out. Later you can get more advanced if you want. And eat for goodness sakes. You have to provide your metabolism with fuel my friend. You have to eat and exercise.
After a really busy day at work---I was ready for a quick nap before heading out with friends for a night on the town. I'm the designated driver in these situations---a role I feel really good about. I don't drink, except rarely in social situations, but even then---I'm very conscious of the calories in my drinks. We didn't get back until really late and then I visited with Amber into the morning.
Before I went to sleep, I laid there and enjoyed my thoughts about many wonderful things. There's so much to be excited about in the coming weeks and months. Opportunities not even remotely possible had this journey never started. I'm ready to fly my friend--and so are many of my friends. Seriously, I can't help but be optimistic about what the future holds---and it's really fun to dream about. It'll be even better doing it.
Thank you for reading. Amber has spent some time with friends, but tomorrow we're working out together...and Sunday I think we may be planning a trip to Stillwater to celebrate Amber's birthday with the family. Today was Irene's 38th birthday. Happy birthday Irene! I've never missed one of her birthdays since she turned sweet 16. I didn't see her at all today, kind of strange---but OK. She had to work tonight anyway. Some changes are easier than others—that's for sure. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Not Everything—But Too Much To Go Back and Simple Getting Started Advice
Compared to yesterday morning, this mornings rise at 4:10am would be considered sleeping late. I jumped up with plenty to accomplish before I found the seat behind the microphone at 6am. I wanted a workout enjoyed and a blog page written, oh---and a shower, breakfast, and getting dressed. Oh my...maybe I should have jumped up earlier! I was able to get it done with about five minutes to spare. I cut it a little too close today. But I really like working out before work. It energizes me like crazy! It sets the tone for a wonderful day. It wasn't the longest workout but it was concentrated and good. I'm really digging the sit ups. I never thought I'd say that, but really...those things kill my abs---I love it! I just love that I can actually feel abs under there!! That's really thrilling for me.
A friend asked a question that I've been asked many times by many people, usually by someone who has also lost a considerable amount of weight. The question? Do you ever fear going back? Gaining it all back? My simple answer is: NO. Melissa Walden told me a long time ago, after a “Lose To Win” seminar, “you know too much to ever go back!” And it really made sense to me. I've made peace with food. I've accepted that food is my friend—not my enemy. Food is a friend that I don't want to abuse any longer. Because when you start abusing a friend, eventually they're not a friend anymore. I'm not perfect, I don't “eat clean” by any stretch of the imagination. My issues with overeating have been resolved and right now that's more important to me than anything. Could my choices improve? Of course! Are you kidding? But from where I came, everything has improved, and now that I have a taste of this freedom---I'm never going back. I don't know everything, but I do know enough to know that I can confidently move forward without fear of losing this freedom. I'll make my life all about sharing this journey to freedom---and that positive message will constantly remind me of where I've been and where I'm headed. No, I'm never going back.
Every now and then someone ask me to give them advice on how to get started. My advice reflects my philosophy that change must be natural and gradual to take a firm hold in our brains. The phrase "nothing is off limits," completely gets under some people's skin---and I understand why, but realize that this approach is exactly what has transformed me from a 505 pound food addict mess of a man to where I am today. The positive from this change is far greater than the negative of some of my food choices. You have to start somewhere and for me it had to be a natural progression of good choices, or better choices--focusing on amounts-portion control--rather than prohibiting "bad" foods. My advice is always heavy on the mental aspects, after all, they are the most important elements of success along this road. Instead of re-writing what I tell them—I'll just share this excerpt from Day 232 titled “Required Mental Exercises:”
Forget every rule you thought was iron clad about losing weight.
Admit to yourself that you don't know it all, because someone who knows it all can't learn effectively. Have you ever heard someone say “you can't change him, he's set in his ways.” Be open to a “new,” simple approach to weight loss that really isn't new at all.
Wipe from your mind the idea that some foods are forbidden.
Do some really deep internal self-counseling to discover your “motivating thoughts.” Why do you want to lose weight and feel great? Develop that list and defend it from your old habits at all cost.
Realize that food is not the enemy, you have been your own worst enemy.
Let go of any blame for your obesity that you have ever placed on someone or something.
Admit that you are the one in charge of you. And since that is true, you're completely responsible for your habits, good and bad.
Stop being the victim. Empower yourself to rise above your circumstances instead of allowing yourself to stay chained to them in a depressing existence.
Here's a BIG one: Be 100% completely HONEST with yourself. Stop telling yourself lies. Lies come in the form of excuses and rationalizations. Be honest about them and you'll start to recognize them every time they pop out of your mouth or brain. Stop rationalizing bad choices.
Defeat excuses at every turn. Stop thinking of all the reasons why you'll never be able to do this, instead think of all the wonderful reasons to do this and never give up.
Don't “let yourself off the hook.” Don't say “I have time to do this later, I'll start next week, or next month, or after the holidays, or after we get past all of the birthdays coming up...right now, let's eat!” Maybe you don't have time. I let myself off the hook for over twenty years. If your transformation is important to you, don't let yourself off the hook.
Understand that every action has a consequence, good or bad. Shoot for the good ones.
When you're alone, that's when you have to police yourself extra. Almost every weight loss attempt in my past has ended with me binging alone. Don't let yourself down like that. Take pride in your resolve.
Make sure to remind yourself that there isn't a food you can't enjoy at one time or another. You may not have the calories for that cheesecake today, but find a way to work it in sometime soon.
Understand that it will get easier. But only if you put forth a consistent positive effort.
I'm sure there are plenty more spread throughout this journey. Go back and read from Day 1.
Remember, I'm not an expert. I'm just a guy who's been through this stuff my entire life. I was over 500 pounds for the majority of my adult life, until 232 days ago. These things I share are simply breakthrough thoughts and principles I've discovered along the way. If you're skeptical, then hide and watch what I do. Trust me, this is only the beginning of this journey for me. If you stopped reading this blog today and then come back in a few months, you will find me below 300 for the first time since age 16. The most important advice I can give anyone is: Don't make it complicated. Keep it simple! Calories in vs. Calories out. Later you can get more advanced if you want. And eat for goodness sakes. You have to provide your metabolism with fuel my friend. You have to eat and exercise.
After a really busy day at work---I was ready for a quick nap before heading out with friends for a night on the town. I'm the designated driver in these situations---a role I feel really good about. I don't drink, except rarely in social situations, but even then---I'm very conscious of the calories in my drinks. We didn't get back until really late and then I visited with Amber into the morning.
Before I went to sleep, I laid there and enjoyed my thoughts about many wonderful things. There's so much to be excited about in the coming weeks and months. Opportunities not even remotely possible had this journey never started. I'm ready to fly my friend--and so are many of my friends. Seriously, I can't help but be optimistic about what the future holds---and it's really fun to dream about. It'll be even better doing it.
Thank you for reading. Amber has spent some time with friends, but tomorrow we're working out together...and Sunday I think we may be planning a trip to Stillwater to celebrate Amber's birthday with the family. Today was Irene's 38th birthday. Happy birthday Irene! I've never missed one of her birthdays since she turned sweet 16. I didn't see her at all today, kind of strange---but OK. She had to work tonight anyway. Some changes are easier than others—that's for sure. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Friday, January 15, 2010
Day 487 Early Riser and The Only Day Is Today
Day 487
Early Riser and The Only Day Is Today
The alarm sounded at 3am. This isn't natural I thought. My natural inclination is to be going to bed at this time! Although I highly discourage it's use, I did employ the snooze alarm twice for an additional eighteen minutes. This is so dangerous really. Something about the extra nine minutes of a snooze can put us in a deeper sleep than before. Every time I oversleep, it's because of this deeper sleep-snooze phenomena. I took my chances this morning and somehow made it up for a very early Thursday start.
I immediately put on the coffee and jumped in the shower, got dressed and started thinking about breakfast. I prepared a four egg white omelet with mushrooms, green pepper, and half the cheese I normally use. I normally use an ounce of mozzarella---I'm slowly trying to ween myself from this cheese dependency issue. It's not really a problem, but I've noticed that I still enjoy an omelet with less just as much as I do with more, so why not save the calories? Like ridding my green beans of their melty companion, it's these little changes that I'm doing to chip away at older food habits. If I don't try to change some of these habits slowly and naturally---then I'm not evolving like I really want. It's not self-imposed deprivation, it's trying to fine tune some habits. These habits are not “make or break,” just little improvements in me that make me proud. I'm sure the fact that I've stopped putting cheese on my green beans is spreading through my close friends and family like a tale not to be believed. But he always puts cheese on his green beans! Are you serious? I'll have to see it for myself! And I'll have to invite you over for dinner sometime soon.
After my early rise, shower, coffee, breakfast, and writing yesterday's edition of this blog, it was time to meet with Melissa Walden for my 4:45am training session. I fully expected to be doing the same workout from last Thursday morning. Uh, no. After a quick warm-up on the treadmill, Melissa positioned a boxing bag in the middle of the room. She then informed me and my legs that we were going to do some kick boxing style exercises. All of a sudden I had flashbacks to that killer class at the YMCA where she had me kicking until I couldn't kick anymore. You know, if I pretend to have left something important in the car—maybe I can high tail it out of here...STOP IT---I was ready—or at least that's what I kept telling myself. We did several kicks: straight forward kicks, side kicks, round-house kicks, and then a combination right-left kicking exercise that made me feel like Chuck Norris for a few seconds. Just a few. Melissa made sure I was keeping proper form, at one point refusing to let me stop until my foot struck the bag in proper position. That'll make you get it right! You mean if I get it right we can stop my assault on this poor little bag? Yes, yes---and I did get it right.
We corrected my form on some of the other exercises I've been doing from last session and she even added some and tweaked others for optimum efficiency. Oh, she's good---real good. The stretching is such a vital component, and the one part I often ignore. I don't think she's going to allow me to ignore it any longer. My legs felt wobbly and my arms twitched from the weight training movements. I learned that small changes to form can make the biggest difference in our ability to do a particular movement. If I'm having trouble with something, chances are good I just need to adjust my position, or form—as I like to call it now. Imagine that, me—a former 505 pound man, concerned about form.
If I could, I would meet with her every single day for a workout. Oh my—it was and always is a great workout. And you know what I noticed? I do a better morning show after a workout like this. Seriously, I'm a little more open and myself when I'm feeling really good. It's a big enough difference that one of my listeners called this morning and commented “you're sure lively this morning.” Thank you---I really should be that lively every morning.
I decided to work through lunch and just eat my mid-morning snack to hold me over until I arrived back at the apartment. On the way back to the apartment, I grabbed some smoked chicken at a popular BBQ place. I don't order the meal---just the chicken. They try to explain the value of the meal and I try to explain that I don't want potato salad and beans, or bread and sauce. I'm simply interested in the chicken. It's so good and so perfectly smoked, it's all I need! And it's cheaper than if I had bought it at the store and tried to cook it myself. Oh wow, it was some really good chicken! After eating and answering some emails---I decided that I must have a nap. I'm so proud of myself! I actually enjoyed a controlled nap of an hour and fifteen minutes. So much better than my schedule scrambling three hour snooze fest!
The evening was planned. I had a script reading to attend with my fellow actor friends, Amber was coming in from school for the weekend, and I had another workout to enjoy before bed. My day was pretty solid. I like it a bunch. It really got me to thinking about choices and the importance of taking it one day at a time.
Linda, a regular reader, sent me an email with the “one day at a time” message, and it's so true. This journey isn't about 487 days of concentrated effort. I didn't start off on day 1 thinking---Ok, I need to make it this number of days and I'll be over 230 pounds lighter, no---it's just one day. One day of good choices. Not perfect choices, just good choices. Today is the only thing that matters at this moment. If I can get through this day and be proud of my choices, and then put a bunch of these days back to back with each other---then, well---my life will change. That's so important to remember on this journey. I guess that's why this time I never filled out a calendar with goal weights for the entire year. I always did it before when I tried to lose weight. But this time I wasn't and I'm not worried about any other day except my choices today. I'm not saying that writing down goals is bad, it's not. I'm just saying that I always concentrated on the entire journey---forgetting to concentrate on just one day. Instead of looking at the potential results scribbled on a calendar, I've worked on one day at a time---taking those results and the rewards along the way. Yeah...this time is so different from all the rest. That's an understatement.
Thanks for reading. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Early Riser and The Only Day Is Today
The alarm sounded at 3am. This isn't natural I thought. My natural inclination is to be going to bed at this time! Although I highly discourage it's use, I did employ the snooze alarm twice for an additional eighteen minutes. This is so dangerous really. Something about the extra nine minutes of a snooze can put us in a deeper sleep than before. Every time I oversleep, it's because of this deeper sleep-snooze phenomena. I took my chances this morning and somehow made it up for a very early Thursday start.
I immediately put on the coffee and jumped in the shower, got dressed and started thinking about breakfast. I prepared a four egg white omelet with mushrooms, green pepper, and half the cheese I normally use. I normally use an ounce of mozzarella---I'm slowly trying to ween myself from this cheese dependency issue. It's not really a problem, but I've noticed that I still enjoy an omelet with less just as much as I do with more, so why not save the calories? Like ridding my green beans of their melty companion, it's these little changes that I'm doing to chip away at older food habits. If I don't try to change some of these habits slowly and naturally---then I'm not evolving like I really want. It's not self-imposed deprivation, it's trying to fine tune some habits. These habits are not “make or break,” just little improvements in me that make me proud. I'm sure the fact that I've stopped putting cheese on my green beans is spreading through my close friends and family like a tale not to be believed. But he always puts cheese on his green beans! Are you serious? I'll have to see it for myself! And I'll have to invite you over for dinner sometime soon.
After my early rise, shower, coffee, breakfast, and writing yesterday's edition of this blog, it was time to meet with Melissa Walden for my 4:45am training session. I fully expected to be doing the same workout from last Thursday morning. Uh, no. After a quick warm-up on the treadmill, Melissa positioned a boxing bag in the middle of the room. She then informed me and my legs that we were going to do some kick boxing style exercises. All of a sudden I had flashbacks to that killer class at the YMCA where she had me kicking until I couldn't kick anymore. You know, if I pretend to have left something important in the car—maybe I can high tail it out of here...STOP IT---I was ready—or at least that's what I kept telling myself. We did several kicks: straight forward kicks, side kicks, round-house kicks, and then a combination right-left kicking exercise that made me feel like Chuck Norris for a few seconds. Just a few. Melissa made sure I was keeping proper form, at one point refusing to let me stop until my foot struck the bag in proper position. That'll make you get it right! You mean if I get it right we can stop my assault on this poor little bag? Yes, yes---and I did get it right.
We corrected my form on some of the other exercises I've been doing from last session and she even added some and tweaked others for optimum efficiency. Oh, she's good---real good. The stretching is such a vital component, and the one part I often ignore. I don't think she's going to allow me to ignore it any longer. My legs felt wobbly and my arms twitched from the weight training movements. I learned that small changes to form can make the biggest difference in our ability to do a particular movement. If I'm having trouble with something, chances are good I just need to adjust my position, or form—as I like to call it now. Imagine that, me—a former 505 pound man, concerned about form.
If I could, I would meet with her every single day for a workout. Oh my—it was and always is a great workout. And you know what I noticed? I do a better morning show after a workout like this. Seriously, I'm a little more open and myself when I'm feeling really good. It's a big enough difference that one of my listeners called this morning and commented “you're sure lively this morning.” Thank you---I really should be that lively every morning.
I decided to work through lunch and just eat my mid-morning snack to hold me over until I arrived back at the apartment. On the way back to the apartment, I grabbed some smoked chicken at a popular BBQ place. I don't order the meal---just the chicken. They try to explain the value of the meal and I try to explain that I don't want potato salad and beans, or bread and sauce. I'm simply interested in the chicken. It's so good and so perfectly smoked, it's all I need! And it's cheaper than if I had bought it at the store and tried to cook it myself. Oh wow, it was some really good chicken! After eating and answering some emails---I decided that I must have a nap. I'm so proud of myself! I actually enjoyed a controlled nap of an hour and fifteen minutes. So much better than my schedule scrambling three hour snooze fest!
The evening was planned. I had a script reading to attend with my fellow actor friends, Amber was coming in from school for the weekend, and I had another workout to enjoy before bed. My day was pretty solid. I like it a bunch. It really got me to thinking about choices and the importance of taking it one day at a time.
Linda, a regular reader, sent me an email with the “one day at a time” message, and it's so true. This journey isn't about 487 days of concentrated effort. I didn't start off on day 1 thinking---Ok, I need to make it this number of days and I'll be over 230 pounds lighter, no---it's just one day. One day of good choices. Not perfect choices, just good choices. Today is the only thing that matters at this moment. If I can get through this day and be proud of my choices, and then put a bunch of these days back to back with each other---then, well---my life will change. That's so important to remember on this journey. I guess that's why this time I never filled out a calendar with goal weights for the entire year. I always did it before when I tried to lose weight. But this time I wasn't and I'm not worried about any other day except my choices today. I'm not saying that writing down goals is bad, it's not. I'm just saying that I always concentrated on the entire journey---forgetting to concentrate on just one day. Instead of looking at the potential results scribbled on a calendar, I've worked on one day at a time---taking those results and the rewards along the way. Yeah...this time is so different from all the rest. That's an understatement.
Thanks for reading. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Day 486 Evolving Taste and I Must Share This Message of Freedom
Day 486
Evolving Taste and I Must Share This Message of Freedom
I have no idea what exactly combined this morning to make me ill, the eggs, the fruit (can't imagine), the coffee, who knows. Whatever it was completely zapped me today with a severe upset stomach and other undesirable symptoms. Second time in as many weeks in fact. It wasn't long after my show and some production that I was out for the day.
I didn't hit my 1800 calories today, just couldn't for obvious reasons, but I did reach 1400 before the day finished. I grilled some chicken last night and had an entire can of green beans. And get this: The last two times I've had green beans, it has been without cheese! I'm finally growing up! Isn't that nice? I most always melt at least 70 calories worth of American cheese in my green beans, but not the other day when mom was here, and not last night. And you know what? It was good, not bad at all. It's amazing how I've had this lifelong dislike of vegetables, but slowly over the course of the last 486 days, my taste have evolved to include more of these previously avoided foods. Don't serve me a salad just yet, but I'm just saying—eventually, who knows? I'm open to change and taste like never before.
Remember the Tulsa World articles from almost a decade ago? You know, the ones I've written about, the articles where I resolved to lose this weight and quit smoking? I of course failed miserably to produce any results back then---and the final story reflected that dismal failure, no matter how positive I tried to spin it at the time. I had sent Jason Collington, the writer of those stories, an email telling him of my blog and progress. I just wanted him to know that I finally did it. Writing about that experience recently made me want to touch base with him and say “see---I told you I could!” Jason was impressed with the progress. And you see, Jason is no longer a staff writer at the Tulsa World, he's an editor. After reviewing this blog he has assigned their best feature writer to explore a possible 'update' story of sorts. I'll be talking with that writer on Wednesday the 20th. I certainly didn't expect that, but I will certainly not shy away from sharing my experience in hopes that it can help inspire someone facing their own journey to a better and longer life.
That's all I want to do really. I want to continue getting to where I'm headed and sharing my experiences along the way with as many as I can. A friend asked me the other day a familiar question: “Do you ever get tired of talking about weight loss?” The answer is no. Just ask my friends who have witnessed me passionately speak about the fundamentals and the complicated aspects of this journey. And I'm not talking about seminars for an organized group, I'm speaking about casual circumstances where the topic comes up, and it always comes up. I've conducted “mini-seminars” in the middle of a convenience store lobby and in the produce section of the grocery store. And don't get stuck with me in a vehicle on a road trip---just let the topic come up there---I'll talk your ear off. This is my passion. This is my future and there's nothing I can do or would want to do to change that. I can't be quiet about this freedom and what has been required of me to realize this freedom. As I continue to evolve and learn more, I'm excited about the possibilities of my transformation on many levels, especially in regard to sharing this message.
My workout tonight was short and sweet. I did my prescribed strength training exercises and two miles on the treadmill. I'll be meeting with Melissa Walden in the morning for another training session at 4:45am. I'm feeling better tonight, but still not completely well.
I sincerely appreciate your readership and support. Amber is coming in late tomorrow. She'll be here for the entire weekend. I can't wait to workout with my baby! Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Evolving Taste and I Must Share This Message of Freedom
I have no idea what exactly combined this morning to make me ill, the eggs, the fruit (can't imagine), the coffee, who knows. Whatever it was completely zapped me today with a severe upset stomach and other undesirable symptoms. Second time in as many weeks in fact. It wasn't long after my show and some production that I was out for the day.
I didn't hit my 1800 calories today, just couldn't for obvious reasons, but I did reach 1400 before the day finished. I grilled some chicken last night and had an entire can of green beans. And get this: The last two times I've had green beans, it has been without cheese! I'm finally growing up! Isn't that nice? I most always melt at least 70 calories worth of American cheese in my green beans, but not the other day when mom was here, and not last night. And you know what? It was good, not bad at all. It's amazing how I've had this lifelong dislike of vegetables, but slowly over the course of the last 486 days, my taste have evolved to include more of these previously avoided foods. Don't serve me a salad just yet, but I'm just saying—eventually, who knows? I'm open to change and taste like never before.
Remember the Tulsa World articles from almost a decade ago? You know, the ones I've written about, the articles where I resolved to lose this weight and quit smoking? I of course failed miserably to produce any results back then---and the final story reflected that dismal failure, no matter how positive I tried to spin it at the time. I had sent Jason Collington, the writer of those stories, an email telling him of my blog and progress. I just wanted him to know that I finally did it. Writing about that experience recently made me want to touch base with him and say “see---I told you I could!” Jason was impressed with the progress. And you see, Jason is no longer a staff writer at the Tulsa World, he's an editor. After reviewing this blog he has assigned their best feature writer to explore a possible 'update' story of sorts. I'll be talking with that writer on Wednesday the 20th. I certainly didn't expect that, but I will certainly not shy away from sharing my experience in hopes that it can help inspire someone facing their own journey to a better and longer life.
That's all I want to do really. I want to continue getting to where I'm headed and sharing my experiences along the way with as many as I can. A friend asked me the other day a familiar question: “Do you ever get tired of talking about weight loss?” The answer is no. Just ask my friends who have witnessed me passionately speak about the fundamentals and the complicated aspects of this journey. And I'm not talking about seminars for an organized group, I'm speaking about casual circumstances where the topic comes up, and it always comes up. I've conducted “mini-seminars” in the middle of a convenience store lobby and in the produce section of the grocery store. And don't get stuck with me in a vehicle on a road trip---just let the topic come up there---I'll talk your ear off. This is my passion. This is my future and there's nothing I can do or would want to do to change that. I can't be quiet about this freedom and what has been required of me to realize this freedom. As I continue to evolve and learn more, I'm excited about the possibilities of my transformation on many levels, especially in regard to sharing this message.
My workout tonight was short and sweet. I did my prescribed strength training exercises and two miles on the treadmill. I'll be meeting with Melissa Walden in the morning for another training session at 4:45am. I'm feeling better tonight, but still not completely well.
I sincerely appreciate your readership and support. Amber is coming in late tomorrow. She'll be here for the entire weekend. I can't wait to workout with my baby! Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Day 485 Refreshing The Mix Tape In My Head and A Timely Reminder About Time
Day 485
Refreshing The Mix Tape In My Head and A Timely Reminder About Time
I went back into the archives today and read Day 327. It's the post I've read the most out of all I've written. I've probably read that nugget of self therapy twenty times. What struck me tonight was the date. I posted that on August 7th, five months ago...and since then, I've lost an average of six pounds per month. I lost 201 pounds in ten and a half months and only 31 in the last five. That's a slow down my friend. After driving myself crazy trying to analyze what changed and why such a dramatic slowdown, I had to re-visit another post even further back in the archives to remind me that it's OK. Day 189 provided this:
Time doesn't really care what we do. Time keeps moving right along like clockwork, uh, it is clockwork. No matter what we do in the next twelve months, good or bad, it's still going to be March 22, 2010 in one year. Time is a constant, that's a pretty simple statement. But it's one I really had to wrap myself around. I had to dig deep to battle my impatient personality. I finally realized that I really needed to forget about time. Time doesn't need me to worry about it, it'll keep moving right along without any help or hindrance. Instead of focusing on how much time it's going to take, I had to focus on what I needed to do each day to succeed. And then when I do take the time to notice the time, I'm happy with the progress I've made and continue to make. It's day 189 by golly, 189! I've lost over 131 pounds! That's almost three quarters of a pound a day! You can tell that I don't really pay much attention to time because on March 15th's blog I didn't mention the fact that it was exactly the sixth month mark of this journey. It totally escaped me. Will it take a year total to reach my goal? Maybe it takes another year from now? Who cares! I'll be there when I get there, then I'll look at the clock and marvel at how far I've come in such a relatively short time. I didn't grow to over 500 pounds in a year or a year and a half, but I can get to my ideal weight in that time? I guess time really is on my side huh? We've all been in a situation where we were watching the seconds tick by on a clock conveniently positioned near our face. Maybe you were in class, or in a doctors office, or at work. When you constantly focus on the clock it can feel like forever! That's why I don't. Time will do it's thing, and I'll do mine, we'll meet up later in a triumphant celebration of accomplishment.
I've plowed right down to 16.5% body fat, no wonder it's slowed to a crawl! And really---time doesn't matter. Time can sting harshly when we look at a calendar and envision what could have been had we committed ourselves to change. Oh yes-- “calendar regret.” I remember it so well from all the failed attempts of my weight loss past. I would mark up entire calendars with goal weights---all the way through the year---and then be tortured all year long as it reminded me of where I could have been but wasn't. I don't have that regret anymore. I look at the calendar and smile. The last sixteen months have been nothing short of forever life changing. Time was always on my side---I just had to stop focusing on the time. And this time, I never took the time to write out the goal weights for the entire calendar---I was too busy losing weight and feeling great to even notice. I must always remember that attitude. It's served me well.
And what was I going back to Day 327 for anyway? Just refreshing the mix tape of my mind, that's all.
I was running late this morning and that meant a crazy breakfast. I threw a frozen chicken breast on the Foreman Grill and jumped in the shower. By the time I was dressed and ready, it was ready to eat---I didn't have time to eat yet. I packed it in a sack with an apple and away I traveled through the freezing fog into radio land. I enjoyed the unconventional breakfast during the first part of my show. It was pretty good too. We're back to some egg whites with mushrooms and peppers and perhaps some oatmeal in the morning---I'm a conventional kind of guy I guess.
I came home for lunch and enjoyed some low sodium-low calorie Progresso Light soup. Ah yes---I did accept that promotional offer from General Mills. Free soup? And Progresso no less? Sign me up! I will be sharing details with you about Progresso Light Soups and a wonderful contest they have for you in the coming days. However, I probably will not accept another of these type of offers anytime soon. With Progresso it was an easy yes because I love soup and it works very well in my calorie budget. But I certainly don't want to tarnish the integrity of this blog by commercializing my message. Maybe I should have also read Day 165 while I was digging into the archives today. Anyway—Progresso Light, especially the lower sodium varieties are tremendous soups. I highly recommend them. I really do. Please consider buying them. Ok?
The soup for lunch was wonderful and after a few more hours I enjoyed a banana and another apple. Melissa is wanting me to make sure I'm consuming at least five servings of fruits and vegetables a day. That's a good plan, I know it is---and really, that's not that hard to do. I can't believe how many years I didn't!
I was on my way out the door for a workout at the YMCA when my text message alert went off. It was a friend asking me if I was watching the Biggest Loser. I wasn't, so I replied that I was headed to the gym for a good workout instead. I've already invested over an hour on that show---and it's so easy to get emotionally involved—so I just don't. Instead of sitting there watching and crying right along with these wonderful people (because I can relate so well), I'd rather be doing what they're doing. Working this body into shape!
I opted for the YMCA tonight instead of the fitness room downstairs. I wanted to hit that weight room good and hard---and I did. I'm going to be so sore in the morning. Most of the movements Melissa is having me do rely solely on my own body weight for resistance, which is wonderful, but I wanted access to the free weights as well. It was nice. I might have looked silly occasionally---down there doing exercises without using any weights or machines, but I don't care. I was there...and I'm going to someday own every weight in that place. Not literally “own” it, but own it---you know what I mean. After the weight room I headed up to the fitness center for some cardio. The weights and exercises already had my metabolism and heart pumping and the cardio offered a real efficient burn afterward. I did a mile on the treadmill and then jumped into the racquetball court for some one on one with the wall. I was flying high my friend. It was sweet.
Thank you for reading! I just talked with Amber and she told me she's doing wonderful and plans on updating her blog tomorrow. Tomorrow is the day she gets weighed and her body fat calculated by her wellness professor. She'll have plenty to report. She expressed to me that she just doesn't have time to blog everyday and I totally agree. Her studies and school schedule take priority. I told her to just update when she can and keep up the great work. I honestly can't remember her ever being this excited about this journey. She's pumped and it comes through in her voice. I'm so proud of her. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Refreshing The Mix Tape In My Head and A Timely Reminder About Time
I went back into the archives today and read Day 327. It's the post I've read the most out of all I've written. I've probably read that nugget of self therapy twenty times. What struck me tonight was the date. I posted that on August 7th, five months ago...and since then, I've lost an average of six pounds per month. I lost 201 pounds in ten and a half months and only 31 in the last five. That's a slow down my friend. After driving myself crazy trying to analyze what changed and why such a dramatic slowdown, I had to re-visit another post even further back in the archives to remind me that it's OK. Day 189 provided this:
Time doesn't really care what we do. Time keeps moving right along like clockwork, uh, it is clockwork. No matter what we do in the next twelve months, good or bad, it's still going to be March 22, 2010 in one year. Time is a constant, that's a pretty simple statement. But it's one I really had to wrap myself around. I had to dig deep to battle my impatient personality. I finally realized that I really needed to forget about time. Time doesn't need me to worry about it, it'll keep moving right along without any help or hindrance. Instead of focusing on how much time it's going to take, I had to focus on what I needed to do each day to succeed. And then when I do take the time to notice the time, I'm happy with the progress I've made and continue to make. It's day 189 by golly, 189! I've lost over 131 pounds! That's almost three quarters of a pound a day! You can tell that I don't really pay much attention to time because on March 15th's blog I didn't mention the fact that it was exactly the sixth month mark of this journey. It totally escaped me. Will it take a year total to reach my goal? Maybe it takes another year from now? Who cares! I'll be there when I get there, then I'll look at the clock and marvel at how far I've come in such a relatively short time. I didn't grow to over 500 pounds in a year or a year and a half, but I can get to my ideal weight in that time? I guess time really is on my side huh? We've all been in a situation where we were watching the seconds tick by on a clock conveniently positioned near our face. Maybe you were in class, or in a doctors office, or at work. When you constantly focus on the clock it can feel like forever! That's why I don't. Time will do it's thing, and I'll do mine, we'll meet up later in a triumphant celebration of accomplishment.
I've plowed right down to 16.5% body fat, no wonder it's slowed to a crawl! And really---time doesn't matter. Time can sting harshly when we look at a calendar and envision what could have been had we committed ourselves to change. Oh yes-- “calendar regret.” I remember it so well from all the failed attempts of my weight loss past. I would mark up entire calendars with goal weights---all the way through the year---and then be tortured all year long as it reminded me of where I could have been but wasn't. I don't have that regret anymore. I look at the calendar and smile. The last sixteen months have been nothing short of forever life changing. Time was always on my side---I just had to stop focusing on the time. And this time, I never took the time to write out the goal weights for the entire calendar---I was too busy losing weight and feeling great to even notice. I must always remember that attitude. It's served me well.
And what was I going back to Day 327 for anyway? Just refreshing the mix tape of my mind, that's all.
I was running late this morning and that meant a crazy breakfast. I threw a frozen chicken breast on the Foreman Grill and jumped in the shower. By the time I was dressed and ready, it was ready to eat---I didn't have time to eat yet. I packed it in a sack with an apple and away I traveled through the freezing fog into radio land. I enjoyed the unconventional breakfast during the first part of my show. It was pretty good too. We're back to some egg whites with mushrooms and peppers and perhaps some oatmeal in the morning---I'm a conventional kind of guy I guess.
I came home for lunch and enjoyed some low sodium-low calorie Progresso Light soup. Ah yes---I did accept that promotional offer from General Mills. Free soup? And Progresso no less? Sign me up! I will be sharing details with you about Progresso Light Soups and a wonderful contest they have for you in the coming days. However, I probably will not accept another of these type of offers anytime soon. With Progresso it was an easy yes because I love soup and it works very well in my calorie budget. But I certainly don't want to tarnish the integrity of this blog by commercializing my message. Maybe I should have also read Day 165 while I was digging into the archives today. Anyway—Progresso Light, especially the lower sodium varieties are tremendous soups. I highly recommend them. I really do. Please consider buying them. Ok?
The soup for lunch was wonderful and after a few more hours I enjoyed a banana and another apple. Melissa is wanting me to make sure I'm consuming at least five servings of fruits and vegetables a day. That's a good plan, I know it is---and really, that's not that hard to do. I can't believe how many years I didn't!
I was on my way out the door for a workout at the YMCA when my text message alert went off. It was a friend asking me if I was watching the Biggest Loser. I wasn't, so I replied that I was headed to the gym for a good workout instead. I've already invested over an hour on that show---and it's so easy to get emotionally involved—so I just don't. Instead of sitting there watching and crying right along with these wonderful people (because I can relate so well), I'd rather be doing what they're doing. Working this body into shape!
I opted for the YMCA tonight instead of the fitness room downstairs. I wanted to hit that weight room good and hard---and I did. I'm going to be so sore in the morning. Most of the movements Melissa is having me do rely solely on my own body weight for resistance, which is wonderful, but I wanted access to the free weights as well. It was nice. I might have looked silly occasionally---down there doing exercises without using any weights or machines, but I don't care. I was there...and I'm going to someday own every weight in that place. Not literally “own” it, but own it---you know what I mean. After the weight room I headed up to the fitness center for some cardio. The weights and exercises already had my metabolism and heart pumping and the cardio offered a real efficient burn afterward. I did a mile on the treadmill and then jumped into the racquetball court for some one on one with the wall. I was flying high my friend. It was sweet.
Thank you for reading! I just talked with Amber and she told me she's doing wonderful and plans on updating her blog tomorrow. Tomorrow is the day she gets weighed and her body fat calculated by her wellness professor. She'll have plenty to report. She expressed to me that she just doesn't have time to blog everyday and I totally agree. Her studies and school schedule take priority. I told her to just update when she can and keep up the great work. I honestly can't remember her ever being this excited about this journey. She's pumped and it comes through in her voice. I'm so proud of her. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Day 484 A Different Motivation and Self-Acceptance
Day 484
A Different Motivation and Self-Acceptance
Monday called and I answered with an upbeat attitude. Attitude is so important along this road, it's everything really. We've got our work cut out for us now and I know that the only way to win at this point in the journey is to buckle down and give myself a performance that makes me proud. I've already won, but you know what I mean. What I want and where I'm headed is yet to be realized. It's not an unrealistic expectation—but one that must be achieved without the pressure and worry of imminent death. What I mean is, to see my goals and dreams through---I must want it enough to push myself further because I want it, not because I'm trying to survive. It's a different motivation now. I hope that makes sense.
Breakfast this morning was a little different. I realized that I only had one egg left in the fridge. I prepared the whole egg over easy, grabbed a bowl of steel cut oats sweetened with Splenda, and sliced up a granny smith apple. Breakfast was served for 320 calories, and it was good! Getting up early enough to make breakfast a super priority is one of the biggest changes I've made to my daily routine. Even when I occasionally sleep too long, I still make sure I'm eating something for breakfast. It is a can't miss meal.
I've talked recently about my desire to have skin removal surgery at some point this year. I get very enthusiastic when I talk about it, but I wanted to make something very clear. Even if I never get that surgery, I'll be happy with my results. Seriously, I'm getting healthier than I've ever been in my entire life. And if the loose skin isn't some kind of medical problem, and it may not be, then I have nothing to be displeased about. If I figure out a way to have it, I'm sure I will at some point. But not without understanding the risk and complications of such a surgery. A full body lift is a major surgery that requires six weeks of recovery time according to information I've discovered recently. That's serious stuff.
You see, this issue of loose skin has bothered me for a long time, well before I ever started losing the weight. I actually would let the idea of the loose skin discourage me from losing weight. How crazy is that? I finally realized that losing the weight and getting healthy was way more important than worrying about the loose skin problem. This is me—and it will never be perfect even after such a surgery, and I'm OK with that. I'm thrilled just being me and being healthy. The freedom I'm experiencing now and will continue to experience in the future is the important stuff. This pursuit isn't a pursuit of perfection, it's a pursuit of good health. Perhaps I've sounded vain in my enthusiastic reeling about the surgery and sculpting the body of my dreams. But it's not that. It's this:
I've hated the way I've looked my entire life. I'll never forget the hurt feelings when I was told by a stranger that I needed to wear a bra. I was only 10 years old---and it was from that point on that I couldn't stand myself in the mirror. It didn't make me do anything about it, but I still didn't like it. As I grew larger and larger, my self-loathing grew as well. At a certain point, I told myself that I would never have a flat stomach and even if I lost the weight, I'd still be horribly out of shape. It was enough to discourage me completely. Giving up is a really sad thing. But I eventually realized that even if perfection was unreachable---my own version of perfection was in reach. I needed to lose the weight to live. It was killing me. Now that I see where I am after losing the first 231 pounds---I can honestly say that for the first time in my life, I can look in the mirror and smile---I'm liking what I see for the first time ever. The idea of wanting to make it as good as I can by working out and maybe having a major surgery---isn't a vanity issue, it's simply a me issue. But make no mistake---with or without that surgery---I'm loving myself regardless. I've finally stopped being my own worst enemy. I've finally become a friend to myself. And that friend I've become accepts me completely, just as I am. My self-acceptance doesn't depend on whether or not I have skin removal surgery. I'll be “Sean-Perfect” regardless.
Hitting the fitness room tonight was good for me---but I seriously need to start scheduling workout times with Courtney, and if she's working---like tonight, then I need to call on friends instead of doing it alone. I can still get a good workout---but it's always better when you're with someone else. I'm feeling a soreness I haven't felt along this entire journey. I'm starting to work muscles that I've completely ignored before. My abs hurt. I'm not sure if my abs have ever hurt. I wasn't sure until just a little while back that I even had abdominal muscles. Yep, I have 'em. They're under there and they're not happy right now. Oh well, they have the same loose skin to get happy under! ;)
My friend Scott Hayes sent me a picture of his first egg white omelet. I've included it below. Scott writes: Tried my first egg white omelet tonight. Four egg whites, turkey, and cheese. I figured it under 250 calories and I'm so full I wish I would have just made it with three whites. Thanks for the suggestion, I see how you got hooked on them. It's just a great calorie value. The most bang for my calorie buck! Scott---hope you don't mind seeing your dinner posted on this blog!
Thank you for reading and giving me your wonderful support. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Scott has been reading about my love of egg white omelets for some time. This was his first---it looks good and filling to me---and under 250 calories with turkey and cheese. Perfect!
A Different Motivation and Self-Acceptance
Monday called and I answered with an upbeat attitude. Attitude is so important along this road, it's everything really. We've got our work cut out for us now and I know that the only way to win at this point in the journey is to buckle down and give myself a performance that makes me proud. I've already won, but you know what I mean. What I want and where I'm headed is yet to be realized. It's not an unrealistic expectation—but one that must be achieved without the pressure and worry of imminent death. What I mean is, to see my goals and dreams through---I must want it enough to push myself further because I want it, not because I'm trying to survive. It's a different motivation now. I hope that makes sense.
Breakfast this morning was a little different. I realized that I only had one egg left in the fridge. I prepared the whole egg over easy, grabbed a bowl of steel cut oats sweetened with Splenda, and sliced up a granny smith apple. Breakfast was served for 320 calories, and it was good! Getting up early enough to make breakfast a super priority is one of the biggest changes I've made to my daily routine. Even when I occasionally sleep too long, I still make sure I'm eating something for breakfast. It is a can't miss meal.
I've talked recently about my desire to have skin removal surgery at some point this year. I get very enthusiastic when I talk about it, but I wanted to make something very clear. Even if I never get that surgery, I'll be happy with my results. Seriously, I'm getting healthier than I've ever been in my entire life. And if the loose skin isn't some kind of medical problem, and it may not be, then I have nothing to be displeased about. If I figure out a way to have it, I'm sure I will at some point. But not without understanding the risk and complications of such a surgery. A full body lift is a major surgery that requires six weeks of recovery time according to information I've discovered recently. That's serious stuff.
You see, this issue of loose skin has bothered me for a long time, well before I ever started losing the weight. I actually would let the idea of the loose skin discourage me from losing weight. How crazy is that? I finally realized that losing the weight and getting healthy was way more important than worrying about the loose skin problem. This is me—and it will never be perfect even after such a surgery, and I'm OK with that. I'm thrilled just being me and being healthy. The freedom I'm experiencing now and will continue to experience in the future is the important stuff. This pursuit isn't a pursuit of perfection, it's a pursuit of good health. Perhaps I've sounded vain in my enthusiastic reeling about the surgery and sculpting the body of my dreams. But it's not that. It's this:
I've hated the way I've looked my entire life. I'll never forget the hurt feelings when I was told by a stranger that I needed to wear a bra. I was only 10 years old---and it was from that point on that I couldn't stand myself in the mirror. It didn't make me do anything about it, but I still didn't like it. As I grew larger and larger, my self-loathing grew as well. At a certain point, I told myself that I would never have a flat stomach and even if I lost the weight, I'd still be horribly out of shape. It was enough to discourage me completely. Giving up is a really sad thing. But I eventually realized that even if perfection was unreachable---my own version of perfection was in reach. I needed to lose the weight to live. It was killing me. Now that I see where I am after losing the first 231 pounds---I can honestly say that for the first time in my life, I can look in the mirror and smile---I'm liking what I see for the first time ever. The idea of wanting to make it as good as I can by working out and maybe having a major surgery---isn't a vanity issue, it's simply a me issue. But make no mistake---with or without that surgery---I'm loving myself regardless. I've finally stopped being my own worst enemy. I've finally become a friend to myself. And that friend I've become accepts me completely, just as I am. My self-acceptance doesn't depend on whether or not I have skin removal surgery. I'll be “Sean-Perfect” regardless.
Hitting the fitness room tonight was good for me---but I seriously need to start scheduling workout times with Courtney, and if she's working---like tonight, then I need to call on friends instead of doing it alone. I can still get a good workout---but it's always better when you're with someone else. I'm feeling a soreness I haven't felt along this entire journey. I'm starting to work muscles that I've completely ignored before. My abs hurt. I'm not sure if my abs have ever hurt. I wasn't sure until just a little while back that I even had abdominal muscles. Yep, I have 'em. They're under there and they're not happy right now. Oh well, they have the same loose skin to get happy under! ;)
My friend Scott Hayes sent me a picture of his first egg white omelet. I've included it below. Scott writes: Tried my first egg white omelet tonight. Four egg whites, turkey, and cheese. I figured it under 250 calories and I'm so full I wish I would have just made it with three whites. Thanks for the suggestion, I see how you got hooked on them. It's just a great calorie value. The most bang for my calorie buck! Scott---hope you don't mind seeing your dinner posted on this blog!
Thank you for reading and giving me your wonderful support. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
Scott has been reading about my love of egg white omelets for some time. This was his first---it looks good and filling to me---and under 250 calories with turkey and cheese. Perfect!
Monday, January 11, 2010
Day 483 This Is Still A Family Journey and An Accurate Body Fat Measurement
Day 483
This Is Still A Family Journey and An Accurate Body Fat Measurement
This entire journey, as imperfect as it's been, has still been magical. Irene started losing weight ahead of the rest of us, and then one by one we joined into a family weight losing machine. We've lost over 500 pounds as a family and it hasn't been without struggle. Irene's 140, my 231, Courtney's 80, and Amber's over 60 has been remarkable...but lately, our progress as a family unit has changed dramatically. In fact, over the last several months our momentum together has slowed to a painful crawl. I can't speak for Irene, but I know that Courtney and Amber have struggled tremendously. I'm here for them every step of the way, but they understand and appreciate that I'm not overbearing. I can't do it for them as much as I'd like. They understand that they have the power to continue what they've started and they have the comfort of knowing that I'm here for them and so is their mom, 24/7.
Courtney talked to me today about working out with me and getting back to the basics that has brought her so far already. That thrills me. And then Amber calls tonight and gave me another wonderful gift. She's tired of struggling and is choosing to change it all around! Amber even updated her blog with an exciting and heartfelt post. I knew that the time would come and she would be ready once again to commit to her transformation. I've never doubted their success and I've never tried to force these choices upon them. I've known when they're struggling, I can see it in the choices made and the attitudes displayed. But I remained quiet for good reason. I've been where they are. And I know that well intended persuasion only works if the recipient is ready to listen and take control over their choices and direction. It's just awesome to me that both my daughters are choosing to resume the progress they worked so hard to achieve---and at the same time. I invite you to read my daughter Amber's blog and if you have time, leave her some encouraging words of support. I'm so thrilled that she's so thrilled. You can find her blog by clicking this link: www.amberisdroppingit.blogspot.com
I started this Sunday by preparing Mom and me a super low calorie egg white omelet. Mom couldn't believe the low calorie count. I flavored it up big time by cooking the mushrooms and onions ahead of the egg whites. Then I used half the mozzarella I normally do for a big four egg white mushroom-onion-cheese omelet for a measly 130 calories. Wow is right! Mom was thrilled. Yesterday's breakfast, and I'm not sure I mentioned this in yesterday's post, but it was steel cut oats and fruit. Breakfast is so critical along this road, it really is important stuff. The metabolism needs it's wake up call everyday, like we're barking orders for it to start moving---and here's some fuel to get you going!
I met with Melissa Walden today so we could recalculate my body fat percentage. It's still really good, surprisingly good in fact. 16.5%. That's thrilling to me. I can remember it being well over 50% at one time in my life. 16.5%...do you realize what that means? And Melissa assured me the number was accurate. Just so you know---I had to take my shirt off in front of her---and even had to pull down my workout pants. We wanted an accurate measurement---so I had to swallow my insecurities and do it. If you only knew the mental hangup I have about taking my shirt off in front of anyone other than Irene. It's been a lifelong thing---oh, I've written about it a few times in these pages. Anyway---can you tell I'm excited? You know what this means? It means that 45.21 pounds of fat is all that remains on my body. The rest is muscle, loose skin, and bones. And not a lot of muscle. I'll lose more weight for sure---but hitting 230 is something that may only be achieved after I have skin removal surgery.
I'm prepping my mind to accept this body fat situation. What a wonderful “problem” to have, right? I know that weight training will gradually add weight in the form of muscle---and that's good. We'll see how this all progresses. I do know one thing---my before and after pictures are going to absolutely rock.
Speaking of loose skin---another blogger gave me the news, and I confirmed by calling the burn center, they do not accept skin donations any longer. It's been years since they allowed that practice. It became cost prohibitive. It's much cheaper to harvest skin from people/donors no longer living. I will pursue the insurance route by presenting the argument that excessive loose skin could cause serious infection. I'm going to need some doctors help with that argument. Regardless, I will have it done, one way or another---it will happen.
Today marks one week without cigarettes!! I'm thrilled at how the cravings are becoming less frequent and less intense. I still get them, even though my body should be over the nicotine addiction—but they pass quickly. It's just too important to stay strong and not give into my desire to light up. Everyday that passes, I'm looking forward to it becoming less and less of a struggle and more and more natural. Last night at karaoke I was surrounded by people smoking and it didn't bother me. I also noticed a guy chewing a straw. I don't know for sure, but I bet he's going through the same thing!
My workout tonight was driven and precisely what I needed. I mentioned to Melissa about how my tail bone hurts during one particular exercise and she suggested a pillow or workout pad. Wow...I can't believe I didn't figure that one out before now. A pillow made all the difference. I went through the recommended movements from Melissa for strength training and added two miles on the treadmill for cardio. The strength training alone elevates my heart rate. I can't wait to start seeing results in the form of muscles. I want guns!! And I'm going to get them by golly!
I better drop in bed. I still need to make sure I'm getting enough sleep. Thank you for reading. I hope you check out Amber's blog too. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
My daughters and me before
Amber. Not sure the date of this photo. So beautiful!
Courtney. Beautiful. Again, not sure when this was taken. Beauty from their momma for sure!
The four of us. Several months ago, or at least a few. We need to update this one!
This Is Still A Family Journey and An Accurate Body Fat Measurement
This entire journey, as imperfect as it's been, has still been magical. Irene started losing weight ahead of the rest of us, and then one by one we joined into a family weight losing machine. We've lost over 500 pounds as a family and it hasn't been without struggle. Irene's 140, my 231, Courtney's 80, and Amber's over 60 has been remarkable...but lately, our progress as a family unit has changed dramatically. In fact, over the last several months our momentum together has slowed to a painful crawl. I can't speak for Irene, but I know that Courtney and Amber have struggled tremendously. I'm here for them every step of the way, but they understand and appreciate that I'm not overbearing. I can't do it for them as much as I'd like. They understand that they have the power to continue what they've started and they have the comfort of knowing that I'm here for them and so is their mom, 24/7.
Courtney talked to me today about working out with me and getting back to the basics that has brought her so far already. That thrills me. And then Amber calls tonight and gave me another wonderful gift. She's tired of struggling and is choosing to change it all around! Amber even updated her blog with an exciting and heartfelt post. I knew that the time would come and she would be ready once again to commit to her transformation. I've never doubted their success and I've never tried to force these choices upon them. I've known when they're struggling, I can see it in the choices made and the attitudes displayed. But I remained quiet for good reason. I've been where they are. And I know that well intended persuasion only works if the recipient is ready to listen and take control over their choices and direction. It's just awesome to me that both my daughters are choosing to resume the progress they worked so hard to achieve---and at the same time. I invite you to read my daughter Amber's blog and if you have time, leave her some encouraging words of support. I'm so thrilled that she's so thrilled. You can find her blog by clicking this link: www.amberisdroppingit.blogspot.com
I started this Sunday by preparing Mom and me a super low calorie egg white omelet. Mom couldn't believe the low calorie count. I flavored it up big time by cooking the mushrooms and onions ahead of the egg whites. Then I used half the mozzarella I normally do for a big four egg white mushroom-onion-cheese omelet for a measly 130 calories. Wow is right! Mom was thrilled. Yesterday's breakfast, and I'm not sure I mentioned this in yesterday's post, but it was steel cut oats and fruit. Breakfast is so critical along this road, it really is important stuff. The metabolism needs it's wake up call everyday, like we're barking orders for it to start moving---and here's some fuel to get you going!
I met with Melissa Walden today so we could recalculate my body fat percentage. It's still really good, surprisingly good in fact. 16.5%. That's thrilling to me. I can remember it being well over 50% at one time in my life. 16.5%...do you realize what that means? And Melissa assured me the number was accurate. Just so you know---I had to take my shirt off in front of her---and even had to pull down my workout pants. We wanted an accurate measurement---so I had to swallow my insecurities and do it. If you only knew the mental hangup I have about taking my shirt off in front of anyone other than Irene. It's been a lifelong thing---oh, I've written about it a few times in these pages. Anyway---can you tell I'm excited? You know what this means? It means that 45.21 pounds of fat is all that remains on my body. The rest is muscle, loose skin, and bones. And not a lot of muscle. I'll lose more weight for sure---but hitting 230 is something that may only be achieved after I have skin removal surgery.
I'm prepping my mind to accept this body fat situation. What a wonderful “problem” to have, right? I know that weight training will gradually add weight in the form of muscle---and that's good. We'll see how this all progresses. I do know one thing---my before and after pictures are going to absolutely rock.
Speaking of loose skin---another blogger gave me the news, and I confirmed by calling the burn center, they do not accept skin donations any longer. It's been years since they allowed that practice. It became cost prohibitive. It's much cheaper to harvest skin from people/donors no longer living. I will pursue the insurance route by presenting the argument that excessive loose skin could cause serious infection. I'm going to need some doctors help with that argument. Regardless, I will have it done, one way or another---it will happen.
Today marks one week without cigarettes!! I'm thrilled at how the cravings are becoming less frequent and less intense. I still get them, even though my body should be over the nicotine addiction—but they pass quickly. It's just too important to stay strong and not give into my desire to light up. Everyday that passes, I'm looking forward to it becoming less and less of a struggle and more and more natural. Last night at karaoke I was surrounded by people smoking and it didn't bother me. I also noticed a guy chewing a straw. I don't know for sure, but I bet he's going through the same thing!
My workout tonight was driven and precisely what I needed. I mentioned to Melissa about how my tail bone hurts during one particular exercise and she suggested a pillow or workout pad. Wow...I can't believe I didn't figure that one out before now. A pillow made all the difference. I went through the recommended movements from Melissa for strength training and added two miles on the treadmill for cardio. The strength training alone elevates my heart rate. I can't wait to start seeing results in the form of muscles. I want guns!! And I'm going to get them by golly!
I better drop in bed. I still need to make sure I'm getting enough sleep. Thank you for reading. I hope you check out Amber's blog too. Goodnight and...
Good Choices,
Sean
My daughters and me before
Amber. Not sure the date of this photo. So beautiful!
Courtney. Beautiful. Again, not sure when this was taken. Beauty from their momma for sure!
The four of us. Several months ago, or at least a few. We need to update this one!
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