Since our last edition: I've maintained the integrity of my food plan boundaries, I've remained refined sugar-free, I've met or exceeded my daily water goal, I've had a few exercise sessions-one at the RecPlex plus walking and body-weight strength exercises at home, and I've stayed well connected with exceptional support.
I've been doing fairly well of late. I've been resting better on the days when I honor certain boundaries I've created concerning my coffee consumption. I love my coffee...a lot...like, a lot lot, but with that love has come a good measure of denial about how it affects my sleep. It took switching to a more powerful coffee for me to be jolted out of that denial. Cafe Bustelo is amazing coffee. I discovered it quite by accident simply because it was a bargain at $2.88 for a 10oz brick. I wasn't expecting the incredible flavor and caffeine concentration. I was simply willing to try out a bargain coffee in an effort to save money. I've learned so much more about coffee and coffee culture since discovering Cafe Bustelo. Cuban coffee is espresso ground--and Cubans love their coffee, however, they drink it in small shot glasses--not big coffee mugs like I'm accustomed. My point is: It took switching to this new coffee to honestly acknowledge how caffeine truly affects my body and my brain. If it means more restful sleep--fantastic!
My personal coffee denial dynamic on a purely structural level mirrors anything in my life that I cling onto (or once held onto) with a death grip. It often takes something undeniably powerful to realign us back into a place where we can see and understand things more clearly. What needs are being met or over-met by the thing? How can I better support my needs in a positive way? What wonderful things am I missing out on because of my reluctance to let whatever it is, go? Deep thoughts, I know. Important questions that ultimately challenge the spiritual, emotional, and mental dynamics of this here path we're on.
Mom is still up and down, better--then not so much...okay, then less than okay. Despite her not being 100% yesterday, I got her out and about in a very adventurous way. We planned dinner out followed by the Johnny Rodriguez concert at the theatre. Mom was a big fan of his music in the 70's and early 80's, so I knew this might be something she would enjoy. She had some brain fog going on--more than she's had lately--and it really took away some of her enjoyment of the night--but overall, I'm glad we did it. When she's exceptionally fragile like this she becomes even more of a fall risk. We used her wheelchair 100% for this outing. A challenge that came up was the after-dinner/pre-concert restroom break. I hadn't thought this through. At the nursing home, she has two people to help her. Suddenly, it was just the two of us. We handled it. A restaurant employee made sure the restroom was clear, then stood guard of the door. Mom wasn't real thrilled with this necessary care--but hey, it was just that: Necessary. The only other issue--and it's a minor one, was how her brain fog wasn't allowing her to fully focus on the show or realize 100% what it was. She did recognize the music but afterward, she said: "they sang his songs really well." I was like, "mom, that wasn't a tribute act, that was Johnny Rodriguez--that was him singing his songs."
We had a great time despite the challenges and that's all that matters.
In other news, I was interviewed by the podcast Less On My Plate with comedian Mike Speirs on Friday afternoon. Mike is a stand-up comic who's in the middle of his own incredible transformation. The episode will be out soon--maybe Thursday, perhaps the following Thursday, but soon. We had a good talk about my experience in the world of stand-up as a 500-pound comic, this blog, and about weight loss from a non-diet mentality. It was a good talk.
Until next time, thank you for reading!
Do you own an "I'm Choosing Change" wristband? I wear mine daily as a constant reminder of why my daily practice of things is important. For me, it's simply a daily reminder to be open, willing, mindful, to pause, and to be intentional. If I'm not those things, I get stuck at the line of least resistance and back there is where the old patterns and behaviors thrive. Your order includes priority shipping so you'll get it quickly! Here's the link to order yours right now: https://imchoosingchange.com/product/wristband/
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Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Practice, peace, and calm,
Sean
My website: www.imchoosingchange.com
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