Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Day 254 Not The Best Choice and "Do I Want Fries With That?"

Day 254

Not The Best Choice and “Do I Want Fries With That?”

Some days, oh some days. Some days start out great and go well, then for whatever reason a decision is made that totally upsets my rhythm. Instead of working out last night I slept. Yep, that's right, Mr. Good Choices, Mr. Do the right thing slept from 6:45pm to 2:45 am. The plan was simple: take a refresher nap for an hour and then head to the YMCA for a good workout. I know that maybe I needed the sleep, OK, I'm being too hard on myself...I needed the sleep. But at the expense of my workout? It was the day before weigh day! I can't miss a workout the day before weigh day! I'm really upset with myself right now. Not for getting a solid eight hours of sleep, how can I be upset about that? I'm upset because if I wanted to go to bed early, fine. I just needed to get my responsibilities finished before hand. Instead I just threw them out the window and slept. Was I rebelling? Who knows. I'm happy to report that Amber still worked out without me, I'm very happy about that. Courtney is staying the night at a friends house, and she had planned to recruit her friends for a good walk, I bet she did too! And Irene was at work all evening. I can't get last night back and I can't get too down about it. It's over, lesson learned. What was the lesson? Manage my time better so that I'm not compelled to go to sleep for the night at 6:45 before my workout and nightly blog. If I managed my time correctly, there is no reason why I shouldn't be able to drop in bed by 9:45pm every night. I could get a wonderful seven hours a night that way. I should make that a goal. OK, it's official. My goal is to get in a workout, finish writing, and be in bed by 9:45pm on weeknights.

I'm always ready for weigh day and even though I know that missing my workout the night before probably will not make that much of a difference physically, it sure does mentally. Today (Tuesday) I enjoyed McDonald's for lunch. There are so many people that know about the journey I'm on and I always wonder if they'll see me in the drive-thru and get the wrong idea. “Would you look at that Mabel, Sean is going off the deep end, he's in the McDonald's drive-thru!” Just in case anyone could hear, I made sure to shout my order a little louder to prevent any confusion...Me: “I'LL HAVE A GRILLED CHICKEN WRAP WITHOUT SAUCE AND A FRUIT AND YOGURT PARFAIT.” McDonald's employee: “Could you please repeat that sir?” Me: “A 270 CALORIE GRILLED CHICKEN WRAP WITHOUT THE EXTRA 70 CALORIES WORTH OF RANCH, MAKING IT ONLY 200 CALORIES AND A 160 CALORIE FRUIT AND YOGURT PARFAIT.” McDonald's employee: “Would you like any fries or a hot apple pie with that today?” Me: “Are you serious?” Now don't get me wrong, I've enjoyed McDonald's fries on a few occasions along this journey, but not today. I have yet to have an apple pie, or have I? They are baked instead of fried. I don't think I have, anyway...McDonald's does deserve some kudos for putting the nutrition information on most of the wrappers and packages of items. I think they should do what they are required to do in New York and put the calorie counts on the menu next to each item. I think all restaurants should be required to do this! We had an early dinner Tuesday evening. I grilled some lean beef outside and prepared some mashed potatoes and some boiled okra with stewed tomatoes. The entire dinner plate checked in at 400 calories.

Cravings are something that I deal with on a regular basis. Cravings by themselves are not a bad thing. After all, I've lost weight using a philosophy that anything is permitted within reason, but when the cravings are coupled with crazy “pig out” ideas, that's when they're bad. I'm telling you right now, I could pick any fast food place with a fish sandwich, and easily eat two, maybe three of them. I love fish sandwiches! I almost ordered a fish for lunch, easy on the sauce, but didn't. If I had, I would have dropped the parfait from the calorie budget for sure. When we're talking about cravings and crazy “pig out” thoughts, we're really talking about two very different things. If I'm craving something, I'll eat it in a portion size that doesn't wreck my calorie budget. If I'm having crazy out of control thoughts about gorging, well, that takes a more aggressive approach. I have to stop myself, but how? By getting really serious with myself really fast. I've come too far and accomplished too much to throw it all away. My reasons for losing this weight are not small reasons, they're life or death reasons. I guess you could say that I bring out the hardcore dramatic motivating thoughts. I have a bunch of motivating thoughts, but when I need to shut down some crazy urges, I have to go to the big guns, the dying young scenarios always snap me back into reality. I've fallen victim too many times by submitting to these urges. And trust me, the feeling afterward is a hundred times worse than the feeling I had when I awoke and realized that I had slept right through my workout and writing time.

I'm headed out now at 4:45am to get in a quick 5K before my morning radio show. I have to hurry! I've never walked this early before, but I owe it to myself! I think it'll be fun and I know it will make me feel so much better about myself. Wish me luck on the scales today! Good morning and...

Good Choices,
Sean

11 comments:

  1. Your will power is phenomenal. Tell me it gets easier. I am longing for the day I can say I have been on target for a week, then a month, then a year. Good job with lunch. Can't wait to hear about the next weigh-in. BTW--following your advice, I have not stepped on the scales since Saturday and I won't until June 5. I will have to do it a day early, because we will be out of town on Saturday. Looking forward to seeing a greater response after two weeks. It ain't easy. I've been weighing almost everyday for 18 mos. Now, if I could just quit eating after dark (my snack happy time).

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  2. Wow, you are tough on yourself. But I guess that is what makes you successful....not giving yourself much slack. I'm sure you needed the rest.

    I had to LOL@ hardcore motivating thoughts.

    We can't wait to see how your weigh-in goes!

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  3. Wow- I can only wish my mistakes were sleeping instead of working out! My mistakes are a little more...calorie ladden ;)
    How did you like working out in the morning? Are you more of a morning person? I'm not...but I wonder if working out in the morning would help keep me on track the rest of the day.
    Good luck on your weigh in!!

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  4. Goog luck today!! I know you will be happy with whatever the scales tell you. And you are right, you probably needed the rest. I wish we hadn't played so long the other night. I think that may have contributed to your being up late the other night and making you so incredibly tired. But perhpas you will be more on track with your sleep now. Getting up early and doing a 5 k this morning, hopefully you will be done and tired by 9:45 and be ready to lie down. Maybe this is just what you needed to start a good sleep schedule. You just have to fight the urge to take a nap at 6:45 again today. :-)

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  5. You're getting quite a workout just beating yourself up! Life happens...besides...you'll have great weigh-in results anyway! You apparently needed the sleep. Look on the bright side...you've burned off a lot of calories kicking your own ass, you've set a goal to better manage your schedule, AND you've made your cousin very happy because now she can get to bed at a descent hour since she won't have to wait up till all hours of the night for this blog that she's so addicted to it she thinks she needs her SeanBlog fix before she can sleep!! .. I like the calorie counts on the menu idea! That would be great! I got a big chuckle out of your McD story...visualizing it and knowing its something you would do made me laugh right out loud! Your humor is super-sized for sure! .. I like having these smilies. It sorta helps divide the paragraphs since there are no line breaks in the comment field. Did I share my friends grilled turkey recipe the other day? If not, I will...it's awesome! I have found my craving for chocolate has lessened a lot! I always keep tootsie rolls or mini snickers around just in case I get a craving because one or two of those will usually take care of it...otherwise, the craving will get so bad I'll go buy an entire bar and eat every bite! I haven't had tootsies or snickers in a long while because my friend gave me a small package of kisses for valentines...and I still some of them after 3 1/2 months! So, I"m doing good there! Good luck on the weigh in...can't wait for the results! I'm really proud of you! YOU DA MAN!!! Luv ya, Cuz

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  6. One missed gym session isn't the end of the world. You must have needed the sleep and working out when you are properly rested is probably a lot more effective.

    Well done on this morning's 5K - that'll get things back on track!

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  7. Sean you are doing great. Don't beat yourself up over missing one work out; it happens to people all the time and as long as it doesn't become a habit you will do great. I like the calories on the menu idea myself. I think it would be really helpful. One day a few friends from work and I went to Applebee's for lunch and had one of the chicken wraps and come to find out it was over 1400 calories just in that one wrap, that was with out the small side order of fries that came with it that came in at 400 calories. If I would have know that wrap had that many calories there is no way I would have eaten it. But we live and learn and make better decisions the next time. Anyways good luck today when you weigh-can't wait to have the text message show up on my screen and see how much you have lost the last 2 weeks!

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  8. "I can't get last night back and I can't get too down about it. It's over, lesson learned. What was the lesson? Manage my time better. . ."

    I'll remember that if you do as well! I just read your comment on my page and I replied say that it made me wanna shout GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! So I'll come on over and shout...

    GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
    Just be glad that you've committed yourself to not only working out but hitting the gym to do so! Us "wannabe home workout people" have the dilemma of being able to say "oh well, I'll just work out later" and then, we don't at all.

    I know I should be working out more and I just do NOT know what's stopping me. Perhaps I'm trying to start off one step at a time so I'm not overwhelming myself and then shutting down again like I've done in the past so far.

    Oh, I LOVE your McDonalds situation!! the drive thru as you've read on my blog has been my downfall for so long!!! I have to avoid it altogether...not for me, my son, my mom, no one!

    *pat on your back* you'd be surprised how our bodies will make the decision to rest for us! you sitting awake and next thing you know you're waking up trying to remember what day it is because you slipped into a 4 hour mini-coma!

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  9. oh nooo no no no no, that Grrrr wasn't an angry Grrr,..it was a motivated, Tony the Tiger, YOU GET UP AND GET 'EM GRRRR!!!

    okay, gonna go back and read the rest of your comment...just wanted to hurry on over and let you know that's not what I meant! :D

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  10. I finally have to respond. I went back to day 1 after I saw you on aol the other day. I'm hooked! I'm on day 254 (and plan to read the rest this weekend) and just have to comment on exercising in the A.M. That's the only way I can get my workouts in before work. Because if something happens during the day I don't have to worry about missing any workouts at all!
    Micky D's is the best for those soft serve ice cream cones. Another good ice cream treat is the new Skinny Cow single serve containers! 150 calories and with a cake cone about 165
    Keep up the good work- you are so right about a lot of things- and DO vary your workouts.

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  11. Thanks for this--I can't quite wrap my head around portion control--not eating how much I want still spells deprivation for me. I helps to read your blog. I still can't figure out how you're not hungry! I definitely eat plenty of healthy filling foods--too much of them--way more than 1500 cal worth, and I'm still starving.

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