Thursday, August 12, 2010

Day 694 and 695 Wonderful Dinner, Planning Without A "Plan," and A New Blogger

Day 694 and 695

Wonderful Dinner, Planning Without A "Plan," and A New Blogger

Tuesday morning was an absolute blast. Kenz co-hosted my radio show and proved once again that there isn't anything she can't do. It was fun and really it further strengthened some ideas for the two of us. We've talked about producing some kind of podcast together and I've suggested setting a time to produce a call-in show that we could record and playback on our blogs. I need to discuss the possibility of that with the powers that be, but if it's possible--we might do that real soon.

Tuesday became very busy, real fast, and we were under pressure to leave town by a certain time. We had some wonderful plans in Tulsa with a cousin of mine. My cousin Sherri and her husband are successful business people and recently, Sherri expressed interest in helping to manage my different ideas for the future. I'll say no more at this time, but I will say this: I'm thrilled that Sherri is in my corner. We have big dreams and big plans developing to make them reality.

Sherri and her family hosted Kenz and me for a wonderful dinner and business meeting Tuesday night. The dinner was absolutely over the top incredible---and to make it even better--it was an awesome calorie value! The conversation was fantastic and the food was simply perfection. The late night drive back to Ponca City was setting me up for a short night and exhausted day on Wednesday, but the evening was so good--it was worth every minute invested.

I was digging in the archives from a year ago, when I jumped ahead a little and found the following excerpt from August 19th, 2009. I still have people (usually people that haven't read this blog) ask me for advice concerning different "plans." And sometimes they use the line, "I just want to find the plan that works for me." Well--I'm always polite while giving them the "short version" of why and how certain "plans" never worked well for me...and why a "plan" isn't really the solution. I put the word "plan" in quotes, because although we all need our own personal plan---I know from experience that a pre-packaged--pre-designed weight loss "plan" isn't always the best solution. In my opinion, it's never a real long term solution--Anyway---this excerpt makes my opinion very clear:

For some reason I've ran across several people doing several different “plans” today. I've written my opinions on this topic several times along the way. Without calling any of these “plans” out directly, which I certainly don't mind doing, but I'm trying to be efficient, here's the bottom line on “plans”:

They work. There, I said it. Now all you have to do is find one that works for you, right? Not so fast. They work temporarily. Oh I'm sure every single major “plan” has their long term success stories, but I would imagine it wasn't the plan that gave them the mental changes needed for those long term results. Of course the plan takes all the credit I'm sure. I'm specifically talking about the plans that sell you all the food too. I once read a blog where the author was seriously considering one of these plans because, in her words: “I don't want to have to deal with food issues, just show me exactly what to eat...” But there's the problem screaming out loud. That's why these plans don't work long term for a majority of the people paying large amounts of money. “Results not typical” are words often found at the bottom of the commercial in fine print for a reason. They know their plan isn't a long term solution. It's simply a means to drop weight now. And it works until you go back to reality, the pre-packaged “eat this” foods stop coming and you realize that you never dealt with those serious food addiction problems—and then the weight comes back naturally. Maybe next time they'll give you a discount.

When I hear the phrase “you've got to find what works for you,” I sometimes become irritated by what that means for some people. Just finding something that works isn't that hard, they all work to some degree. Why don't we say “you've got to learn to eat responsibly, exercise regularly, and work extra hard at changing the way your mind works.” Instead we just want to find “something that works for us.” Something that just works isn't good enough.

I lost 115 pounds in 2004 doing something that I knew would work, and it did. I was eating 1,500 calories a day and exercising regularly. Sounds familiar huh? Nope. Completely different mindset involved. I was going through the motions needed to lose weight without changing my mind one tiny bit. I fantasized about cutting loose the entire time---I was dreading everyday, and looking so forward to hitting a milestone goal so I could reward myself with tons of calories. As soon as my “plan” entered a family vacation it was over, and I mean over real good. I wasn't prepared, nor did I want to be, to handle eating responsibly and exercising more. My plan in 2004 was simply a means to drop weight, nothing deeper. And I quickly gained every pound back plus five as soon as it was over.

Real change is so much more rewarding and well, uh, real. And it's not beyond anyone reading this, I guarantee it. But when you start talking about these things, some people get nervous. They get uncomfortable, they feel threatened, they get scared of the changes they know they must make if they're ever going to break free once and for all. How do I know? Because I was one of those people for many years. In my younger days all you had to do was say “lifestyle change” and I would immediately get upset. Don't give me that, I know exactly how to lose weight, I'll do it when I'm good and ready. Don't take away my sense of security in food. Don't take away my blanket. Don't tell me this is something I have to do forever, I need to continue my emotional dependency on food---and your “lifestyle change” talk is threatening that world.

What I've found is amazing. My fears turned out to be completely blown out of proportion. When you work hard at the mental changes, all of a sudden---it's not a depressing thought anymore. In fact, I haven't dreaded a day along this road in more than a couple hundred days. I look forward to the many changes to come and all along the way I'm still enjoying food, I'm still living life, and I'm still feeling better than ever as an adult. This is what real change feels like.

Wednesday was tough physically. On very little sleep, I faced what I knew would be a thirteen hour day. My goal was to make it to the end of my remote broadcast at 7pm, then to my apartment, then to my bed---and then: Collapse. I did exactly that. No workout, but my food was perfect. And really? I was happy with just making it through the day without my sleep deprivation causing an accident of some sort. My sleep and time management skills are two areas that have always been an issue along this road. So if you're along this road like me---don't follow my horrible example in the time management department, in fact, you might show me a thing or two. Hey--I'm always learning along this road. I always will. We must, because it's the only way we improve.

I slept nearly nine hours Wednesday night. And it was a good--extremely restful kind of sleep. I love how it felt! I woke up feeling incredible; full of energy and enthusiasm...this feels beyond amazing.

I received an e-mail from Karyn telling me that she had read about my story on AOL and had now started her own blog, and that her first post featured me. I'm honored! There are others that have done this very thing and it absolutely thrills me every time! Writing along this road is imperative in really getting to the bottom of our issues and learning about ourselves. And it doesn't have to be on a blog page---as long as you're writing for you--it can be in a notebook you keep close and personal. The great thing about sharing your road of discovery, is the support you receive and the inspiration you give to others along the way. If you've recently started a blog too---let me know in an email that includes the link, and I'll check it out--and I would love to feature yours here. Send the email to: seanboy105@hotmail.com and be sure to include the link to your blog and mention the word "blog" in the subject line.
You can find Karyn's new blog at http://metamorphosis4life.blogspot.com/

Thank you for reading. Goodnight and...

Good Choices,
Sean

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Another "lost" before picture, with former colleague Ryan Diamond and a local community leader. I'm really not sure of the occassion.

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Our dinner Tuesday evening with Sherri's family was amazing! Here's my plate--and yes, I even enjoyed a taste of wine. It was grand indeed.

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This desert was an amazing calorie value. At just under 200 calories--this WW ice cream sandwich topped with cool whip, bananas, strawberries, and a drizzle of chocolate sauce was something that I could totally go for on a regular basis. So simple, yet elegant---and it looks like it would be loaded---that's why Sherri put it all together in front of us---she wanted us to see the ingredients and calculate the values. Top notch all the way, very nice!

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Me being silly--wearing Kenz's glasses. I can hear my mom now... "You're going to hurt your eyes!" I know---I took them off quickly!





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This is still one of my favorite "current" pics, despite the Yankees shirt...This is what, like the third time I've posted this one? Sorry to my fellow KC Royals fans! By the way---the Royals are hosting the Yankees in Kansas City all weekend. Kenz and I would love to make a quick trip to see them, but I seriously doubt we'll be pulling that one off right now.

10 comments:

  1. I feel so much better when I get a decent nights sleep. Unfortunately it doesn't happen often enough. So no finger pointing here. It's great to hear your "new career" is taking shape. So glad Kenz is right along with you. You guys are great together♥

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  2. LOL @ you in Kenz glasses!

    I wish you and Kenz a bright future together. Sounds like you have the family backing and support regarding your future plans. It just makes you feel better and makes moving forward so much easier. I will keep you both in my prayers.

    Take Care and God Bless!

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  3. You know, I remember reading something by a woman online who was talking about when she realized she had gained more weight than she wanted and needed a reasonable way to get rid of it:

    "If you eat like a 130 pound person, eventually you will BE a 130 pound person."

    And look around at the healthy-sized people around you -- are they living on pre-packaged plan food their whole lives? No.

    It worked for her as well -- she did the same thing you did, set a daily limit and just calculated everything, and forbade nothing as off-limits.

    And it still keeps hitting me how applicable what you're saying is to all walks of life: Don't spend now and save later, buckle down and do the work, and there's no shortcuts. That advice would alleviate a huge number of life problems for a lot of people, including ones that are totally unrelated to weight.

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  4. Hi Sean..I've been reading your blog for a week or so and I figured I'd come out of "lurk" mode and say hello. Your success is really quite inspiring.

    I'm another who finally woke up to the realization that a "plan" wasn't going to fix me. Only a lifestyle change and learning to live and eat in the real world...

    So I've lost almost 30 pounds since April. I'm using Weight Watchers and the point system to budget my food...just like budgeting money :)

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  5. Ya know, I think you love the Yankees, but you just don't know it yet. ;) And you're right..we have a busy weekend planned which is okay since my team will just embarrass your team anyway.

    Sherri's dessert was amazing..I really, really want it again..like now. :)

    I have more to say, but I'm distracted by the way you look in your Yankees shirt. Just saying. ;)

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  6. Come on Sean, you know you like the Yankees!! (LOL!) Remember, I'm from Jersey...hehehehe

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  7. Hi Sean...I just came across your blog, and I have to say how refreshing it is to read a blog from someone who really gets it!!! So many blogs, and people for that matter are focused on the external changes (food, exercise and the like) all of which are important, but they fail to acknowledge the changes in our mind that must take place to win this battle. I'm one of those people who have tried and tried and tried, only to quit over and over again. It's finally clicked with me that my mind is where most of my problems lie. I'm doing Weight Watchers...not because I think it's some magic plan, but because it's sensible and real.

    I've just recently started my own blog for many of the same reasons you started yours. It's called 'Minding My Weigh'...that says it all. I hope you'll come by for a visit sometime.

    http://mindingmyweigh.blogspot.com/

    Blessings,
    Kimberlynn

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  8. Why do mom's always say that glasses will hurt your eyes....lol. I've said the same thing to my son. Is that real?? Who knows :)

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  9. I just got done talking about this on my blog as well. No special diets.
    period.
    ugh.

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  10. Oh my goodness. I just found you and am so happy I did. Your weight loss is incredible. You look fabulous. Congratulations. I'm not so much into "plans" for myself. At some point you settle, hit your goal, and then what with your plan? Finding the reality of eating like a regular person is something that sticks for life. It isn't fast, sexy or necessarily easy. But it is what works for the majority of human beings.

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