Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

October 28th, 2014 Like Our Life Depends On It

October 28th, 2014 Like Our Life Depends On It

I was in bed by 8pm last night. My eyes opened at 3:30am, ready to hop up and even though I could have easily done just that, I stayed in bed until 4:15am. The eight hours sleep made a positive difference. I woke up feeling much better, physically. Later in the day, for some reason, I wasn't feeling too good emotionally.

An important part of this journey is self-awareness. It didn't take me long to recognize how I was feeling this afternoon. I wish I could identify it a little better, but I can't. I just felt off. It could be because I haven't felt 100% lately and as a result, my exercise has taken a backseat. And perhaps it was getting to me, finally. Maybe it was a general unsettling we can feel when things don't go how we think they should or how we wanted or had hoped they would go. 

I started feeling compelled to eat this afternoon, not long after my lunch--and at first, I analyzed my food--nope, nothing there should be a trigger. Then, as I was white knuckling it throughout the last part of my workday, it dawned on me--this wasn't a physical thing, it was emotional.

I didn't handle it correctly. I should have reached out to a support buddy immediately--and I didn't until much later in the afternoon. I'm not sure why I didn't at the first notion. I recommend it to others all the time and then, when I need to do it, I don't? What's up with that? I'm no different than anyone else. I get emotional, I get discouraged, I get frustrated, I get sad, I can have temporary bouts of circumstantial depression--heck, I've experienced full blown depression in my past--more than once.

Today, even though I wasn't tired, even though I had the opportunity to get to the YMCA early and get my workout on--I chose to go home and crawl under the covers. My escape from this temporary emotional downturn was to get unconscious as quickly as possible. This was my alternative to giving in to the natural tendency to reach for food, as if food is some kind of magical corrective device. It isn't--and I know that for certain. Had I reached for food instead of my unnecessary nap--I would have felt five times worse. I woke feeling a little better about things. And that's when I called a support buddy to talk out what was left of this funk infecting my afternoon.

The talk did wonders for me. After the talk, I started preparing a good dinner and getting ready for the Tuesday night support group conference call. Our overall focus tonight was "What do we do and NOT do in order to help us maintain consistency?" It was a good group discussion!

I felt absolutely empowered after the call tonight. One member, who is on Day 7 of her abstinence from sugar, stated "last week I didn't believe I could do it, now I know I can." <<<That right there...Oh my...The greatest feeling, my friend. It was one of many highlights from the group this evening.

I enjoyed a great dinner and then laced up my shoes for a good, albeit late, workout at the YMCA. I needed this workout more for the mental/emotional benefits than the physical. It did for me exactly what I needed it to do. I felt incredible afterward.

I'm hitting the pillow late tonight--but really, as much sleep as I've had in the past 28 hours--I likely would have laid awake if I had dropped any earlier. I feel like I had to fight today. I did fight. I don't like fighting. I wish it were easy-peasy every single day, but it's not. And that's okay. The important thing to be is self-aware. When it starts feeling like a struggle is coming on, it's imperative to acknowledge it and try to identify the source and if that takes too long to do, or isn't clear--then go straight to your defense mechanisms--call somebody for support--text someone, get out a pen and paper and write it out--anything...even hiding under the covers works, but honestly--dealing with it straight ahead is always best. I'm glad I did make the call for support after my midday slumber. It made a huge difference for me and the rest of my day/evening.

We must protect our journey with everything we can. It's too important. We're important and we're worth the effort. The easy days are awesome--they're the best, of course! But if this time is to be like no other--then on days when it isn't easy, we must be willing to fight for it like our life depends on it...because it truly does.
  
My Tweets today:














Thank you for reading and your amazing support,
I'm incredibly lucky and blessed,
Strength,
Sean
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Sunday, August 24, 2014

August 24th, 2014 Big Difference

August 24th, 2014 Big Difference

I opened last night's blog with a tongue in cheek paragraph about my jar of pickles on the fridge and our Oklahoma earthquakes. Then, Northern California was heavily damaged by a large quake hours later. First of all--my thoughts and prayers go out to all of those affected by what experts are calling the worst in over 20 years. Secondly-- I wanted to clarify how countless experts agree our Oklahoma quakes are typically "inspired" by the energy industry practice of fracking. Oklahoma quakes are rarely anything creating damage (unless your property is right on top of the epicenter). Our relatively small "inspired by industry" quakes seem to be a novelty, usually met with enthusiasm and excited Facebook posts instead of real, genuine concern. The earthquakes we experience here in Oklahoma are nothing at all like the kind of earthquake our friends in Northern California experienced, which are rarely anything to joke about. If you were affected by the California quake, my sincere thoughts and concern are with you tonight.

In an effort to get some much needed rest, I'm cutting tonight's post short. I had a great food day that included spending time with Heather, then traveling to Stillwater for dinner and conversation with mom. I came home and completed a PiYo workout in my living room floor. PiYo is a combination of Pilates and Yoga--and since I've never experienced either of these disciplines, I was slightly concerned. It was fantastic! I had to do a modified version, but still, it was a very easy decision to make this a part of my workout options. My exercise plan tomorrow includes spinning class, maybe swimming and definitely another round of PiYo "Hardcore On The Floor."

My food Tweets today:
 










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Thank you for your readership and support,
Strength,
Sean
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Saturday, August 9, 2014

August 9th, 2014 Relax Day

August 9th, 2014 Relax Day

This entire week has been amazing on so many levels. I took it easy today. I picked it to be my off day on the exercise schedule. I had a location broadcast from the big New Balance event at a shoe store. I dropped by the studio afterward to finish up some production duties then I headed home to prepare an amazing lunch! It's been awhile since I've enjoyed a pita pizza and since yesterday was a "no cheese" day, I decided to make today a good cheese day!

I had a nice evening, complete with a home grilled meal, good movie and great conversation. I tried grilled peaches and grilled avocado!! Please try this if you like avocado--it's amazing. The grilling alters the flavor of the avocado in a wonderful way. Simply cut an avocado in half, leaving the peel on, then turn it upside down on a hot grill until it's hot and soft, then scoop it out whole and enjoy!

Even though I worked some today, it was certainly a "relax day." A relax day doesn't mean I relaxed my resolve to take extraordinary care, it just means I slowed down today and was perfectly okay with the shift in speed. This relax day reminds me to keep this post short and get in bed!

My food Tweets today:








I plan on spending some time tomorrow with one or both of my daughters and my grandson Noah as we travel to Stillwater to visit and dine with mom.

Thank you for reading and your support,
Strength,
Sean
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Wednesday, August 6, 2014

August 6th, 2014 Without Hesitation

August 6th, 2014 Without Hesitation

I'm feeling incredibly well today. It was a busy day but I managed it while getting almost everything I needed done, done. Except a grocery store trip--I postponed that until tomorrow because I'm determined to be in bed at a decent time.

The past few days have been nothing short of miraculous. When something is powerful enough to immediately change the way you think, you know it. It's undeniable. I'm changed from the experiences of late in a profound way. I'm so happy, blessed, grateful and I feel an amazing level of contentment, a peace about the things I've allowed to restrict me. Will it be perfect? I still doubt I would ever dress up like cupid for a TV show--but it's powerful enough for me, right now--today.

My exercise plan today involved a forty-five minute spinning class followed by a water workout. Just as I expected, I didn't have an ounce of hesitation. I finished spinning and headed straight for the locker room to change for the pool. I changed, grabbed the towel and without stopping, walked straight out into the pool area. My daughter wasn't there for support tonight and that was okay. My timing wasn't the best either. The lap pool had a water aerobics class in session and the rest of the lanes were occupied. I walked right past the dozen people doing their class and stood poolside waiting my turn without the slightest hint of anxiety. I was exposed and it was okay. An entire class of water aerobics people could easily see me and it didn't phase me at all. Finally, I realized the entire Northeast corner of the pool was available, so I made my way over--threw the shirt to the side and stood there for a minute. I was letting this experience soak in for a bit. I almost couldn't believe I was standing poolside, shirt off-wearing swimming trunks--and all the while the place was buzzing with people and activity. Once again an authentic reality was proven, just as it was Monday night. Nobody cares!! Nobody is watching me. Not one person is criticizing or poking fun in my direction. I was free to jump in and exercise in the water. And I did. It felt so cool and refreshing, especially after the hot sweaty spin class!

My plan after working out was to go to the store, then home to cook--write and go to bed. I was doing the math and realized I needed to cut some things if I wanted to get to bed at a decent hour. I decided to go for Hawaiian Fajitas at my favorite little Mexican place down the street from the Y.

I employed my usual Mexican restaurant strategy: No beans, no rice, no cheese and I counted out my chips (9) and requested the bowl removed from the table. I ordered crispy corn shells instead of the typical flour tortillas and it was perfect!

I also cut the grocery trip tonight, opting to do that tomorrow. I have enough food to get me by until tomorrow afternoon, no problem!

It was a very good day. I'm headed to bed! Water exercise is exhausting!

Meal Tweets today:












MyFitnessPal says I burned 1,054 calories today. I knew it would be difficult for me to hit my 1200 net calories after exercise, so I'm going to be okay with hitting 924 net calories. My total calories came in at 1,978. It is VERY difficult to be okay with intentionally exceeding 1700. But I trust the professionals who've given me the advice. It makes very good sense but still, it doesn't make it easier for my brain to accept that it's okay!

Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Monday, July 7, 2014

July 7th, 2014 Glad I Made That Decision

July 7th, 2014 Glad I Made That Decision

I had a wonderful morning with mom on my show today. She was delightful. I enjoyed preparing her a nice breakfast, identical to mine--and just sharing the meal and coffee together with casual conversation, cherished moments, you know? One of the coolest stories came at the very end of the show. I mentioned Garth Brooks has scheduled a press conference for Thursday at 11am central on his website GarthBrooks.com. So we started talking about Garth's early days around my hometown. Garth attended college in Stillwater and at one point during his college days, he played his guitar anywhere anyone would listen. One particular occasion was the annual Noon Lions Club fireworks display on July 4th at what was known as Lewis Stadium (Now Boone Pickens Stadium). Garth was the entertainment for the crowd of a few thousand. It was just him and his guitar. He played while everyone waited for it to be dark enough for the fireworks to begin. His performance was basically background music, a mild warm up to the spectacular fireworks everyone was anticipating. While he played, mom turned to me and my Aunt Kelli and said, "That kid is going to make it someday." Wow, was she right or what?? If you go to a Garth Brooks concert today, you'll still see plenty of fireworks because it's a part of his show, but it's not the main attraction anymore.

We stopped to see Noah for a few minutes before we hit the road back to Stillwater. That little guy lights up our world. It was a nice drive back, an opportunity for more conversation and reflection of a wonderful, albeit short visit.

I hurried back home in order to get into the Y for a good elliptical workout, then home to prepare dinner. Sometimes I'm a little too efficient with my calorie counting. My late dinner was a lot of food for a low 414 calories. I knew how late it was and I was certain it would be my #lastfoodofday, yet upon entering the specifics into MyFitnessPal, I realized I had fallen 339 calories short for the day. I wasn't hungry throughout the day. We (Mom and me) enjoyed a big 268 calorie afternoon snack and still, I fell short. Okay--nice "problem" to have, I suppose. This is correctable with some closer attention to calorie management earlier in the day. I realize it is something I can't allow to become habit because the body needs fuel. As I start various additions to my exercise routine (spinning classes-resistance strength training), I plan on adding some calories to the budget. Not being afraid to make bigger calorie management decisions earlier in the day will become very important.

I'll tell you, I honestly didn't feel like working out tonight. I was tired, irritable and feeling kind of off. If I hadn't taken an "off" day yesterday it would have been an easy decision to make today the "off" day. Instead, I sat in my car looking at the YMCA building and coming up with various justifications as to how not working out for the second day in a row would be okay. Finally, I called myself out and made my way in and onto the elliptical. As soon as the music started playing, I was in a better place. I finished the workout and felt even better having overcome the initial mental resistance. I'm glad I made that decision.

I also made a decision to go to bed before finishing this post. I was just too tired to finish before bed. This is definitely not a habit I will allow very often. But occasionally it is the correct option and sleep wins.

Thank you for reading,
Strength,
Sean
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