July 1st, 2018 Critical Elements
Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with exceptional support.
This weekend has been challenging to say the least. But I'm here, I'm well, and I'm ready for a good 4th of July week. We learn things about ourselves when things get tough. This weekend has reinforced some things for me in the areas of staying connected with support. I'm the first to preach its importance but then find myself not doing it when I need to do it. If you've ever heard me say it's sometimes not easy to reach out, uh, yeah---that's from experience.
I enjoyed eleven hours of sleep last night. I can't remember the last time I slept that much at one time. It was needed. It tilted my food schedule today, but that's just fine. I'm under budget by a few hundred calories today and that's not a bad thing.
I picked up mom this evening for dinner out and a shopping trip to Walmart. She walked and pushed a cart the whole time rather than use a wheelchair. She made it just fine, although she's really tired tonight!
I wanted to share something from the archives tonight. The best part is Dave's reply below-- I hope it resonates with you.
From my Facebook page in May 2014:
I've been trying to identify and best articulate the most critical element transforming extreme struggle into harmonious consistency. Having experienced both, it's a fascinating study.
Sure, it's a combination of elements, but what is the one, that without, all the others become ineffective?
Is it acceptance, where suddenly we embrace instead of reject? That's fine, but how do we get to a place of acceptance?
I keep coming back to perspective. Dr. Wayne Dyer says it so perfectly: “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” The perspective we choose is paramount to our success, of course. Sometimes, finding the perspective that engages the gear you're looking for isn't as easy as someone saying, “change your perspective.”
In my opinion, we first must identify, one by one—the mind noise and clutter that keeps our perspective in a locked position. It's mental work that's worth the effort. Because if we can get past these things and truly shift our perspective, suddenly what once seemed impossible becomes not only possible, it becomes our new everyday reality, a non-physical transformation where we can finally experience the seemingly elusive, harmonious consistency."
Dave May, A good friend of mine, who's very familiar with me and with the elements of lasting recovery, added this:
"Want. Want is first. If we don't want to change, nothing happens. Belief is second. If we don't believe we can change, nothing happens. Self-awareness comes third. If we don't become aware of the inner self, the baggage of the past, the self-conscious "facts" we already have in place that are working to defeat us and keep us locked into our old behavior, they will, eventually and assuredly derail any attempt to change and again, nothing happens.
Change, you see is a process and there is ALWAYS a most important element. We move from one most important to the next, and sometimes we must move back to the previous most important element, which brings me to one more "most important" element: Faith.
If we don't have faith, we are sure to fail. Faith that I CAN change. Faith that the mistake I just made doesn't doom me. Faith that if I get on track, or get back on track, change will come. If we lose faith, none of the other elements will matter, because we won't believe they can work.
We, of course, could debate the order of these elements or which is the MOST important, but after years of struggle, growth, setbacks, and triumphs, I believe that is a pretty good BASE list of the "most critical elements" of transformation.
Oh, and let me add one more, lest I forget it and lose all of my progress: HUMILITY. If I ever think "I've got this figured out" I will surely fail. I must remain teachable, and the first element of being teachable is a realization that I do NOT already know all that I need to know.
So the list I have shared with you here is Want, Belief, Self Awareness, Faith, Humility.
Odd that I should have almost forgotten humility, and then placed it last on the list. As I sit here typing, the thought occurs to me that perhaps HUMILITY should be FIRST. Perhaps that I almost didn't even think of it is the real root of my problem? Without humility, NONE of the other elements could exist.
I guess I don't know which is first. All I know is there are a LOT of elements to change and they are ALL the most critical.
Thank you, Sean, for starting my day off with a good think. Now I will add a prayer to it, and I should be off to a good start."
Thank you, Dave!
Thank you for reading and your continued support,