Tuesday, May 12, 2015

May 12th, 2015 The Perfect Time Myth

May 12th, 2015 The Perfect Time Myth

If I had kept this diary prior to September 15th, 2008, it would have revealed someone desperate for some kind of life saving solution.

One of the biggest and scariest thoughts I had back then centered around the idea that life will always contain stressful and emotional situations. They may change in shape and size and with consequences big and small, but they will always be a part of a balanced and normal life.

It was a scary revelation because I had decided, concretely, that I couldn't in any way, shape or form--lose weight successfully unless everything was smooth sailing, every day, every week and so on.

I accepted, as fact: When the rain starts pouring, I start eating.

This perspective afforded me an endless supply of excellent excuses for why "now isn't a good time." 

A "perfect time" is a myth. If I had waited for the perfect time, there's a good chance I wouldn't be alive today.

When someone asks me, what clicked on September 15th, 2008? It was truly the realization that if I was going to survive, I had to remain consistent come what may. I had to walk in the rain and not be afraid. I had to make an iron-clad decision that this time was going to be different from any other previous attempt.

No longer could I allow my resolve to be hard wired into the ups and downs of life. My resolve required a separate power source.

For me, Day 1 was the start of my parallel streams philosophy. I just didn't know what to call it back then.

I found out what happens when I plug my importance level/resolve back into the ups and downs of life. My life stream and fundamental elements stream crossed, and it didn't take too long for these to tangle in such a way, I felt more lost than ever before--and regained 164 pounds of my initial 275 pound weight loss.

This turnaround over the last year-plus, had to start with untangling the two streams and then adding additional measures to keep them separate, including more traditional practices in recovery and stronger accountability/support tools.

Dr. Marty Lerner, PhD, one of the world's leading experts on food addiction recovery, foreshadowed this entire experience in his review of Transformation Road, printed on the very first page of the book. He wrote: "Although incorporating some suggestions that run contrary to some recovered food addicts, Sean's experiences are worth learning about and considering." 

I had a great day today. Much better than yesterday.

I'll make my way into the doctor's office for my fifty-five week weigh-in tomorrow morning! I always share the details on Facebook and Twitter first--and then this blog twelve to fifteen hours later. I'm not too concerned one way or another about the weigh-in. I feel grateful, I feel blessed and I feel wonderful about who I am and what I'm doing. Isn't that what it's all about?

My Tweets Today:

Thank you for reading and your continued support,


  1. I'm still struggling with this concept that you don't get the day off just because it was a bad day. I know it's true, but I still turn to food. There is a part of me that thinks maybe this applies to minor problems, but my mother died! That is a valid excuse, right? And now my father is sick in hospital, maybe dying. So I can eat whatever I want, right? Surely the rule is, if the situation is bad enough then using food to self-medicate is just fine.

    I know it's not just fine. I guess I've been hoping that if I get a long enough stretch of perfect then I'll be in the habit and it will be easier to stick to in bad times. But that long stretch of perfect never happens.

    1. First of all, Natalie, I'm so sorry about your father. I hope his situation improves.
      For people like us, who have long turned to food for comfort, these times bring the greatest challenges. It's also something that in many parts of the world, has become part of the culture--it's what we do. We even define it in its own category..."comfort food."
      When a family member passes, we have a big feast after the funeral...
      When I think back on all of the times I indulged in the name of comforting my emotions, I must admit--it did take me away for a little while, but the pain remained--waiting for me to finish eating.
      One day, the perspective will shift--a groove will be found and suddenly the thought of a "day off" will no longer make sense--because what you're doing is so in tune with what you enjoy and how wonderful you're feeling...It's all in our perspectives, Natalie.
      We truly do not need the stretch of perfect time in order to succeed.

  2. Great post today, can't wait to hear about the Dr visit.

  3. We built this city...... Awesome song I even have my kids singing it lol

    Those strawberries look Devine

    1. Thank you, TR! I agree-- I like it.
      Oh--and the strawberries...I love em!

  4. I've had a thought that is along the same lines as your "perfect time" myth. It's the idea that "tomorrow" never comes. I'll always start "tomorrow." I'll do better "tomorrow." But that is a lie. Because when tomorrow gets here, it's now "today." And again comes the idea that I'll start "tomorrow..." Rinse, repeat.

    There is no yesterday, except to learn from. There is no tomorrow, except to help with planning. There is really only today. Now.

    Wish I could find strawberries like those...they look awesome.

    1. Beautifully written, Silas. Spot on.
      Thank you.

  5. I feel like woah!!! How straightforward this guy thinks. You are just too awesome man.. :)

  6. You have such an interesting blog. Thanks for sharing. Reading blogs is my hobby and I randomly found your blog. I enjoyed reading your posts. All the best for your future blogging journey. Please keep in touch with me in Twitter, @ipersuade.

    1. Thank you, Sridhar! I'll find you on Twitter. Nice self-help blog!


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