Monday, July 13, 2009

Day 302 Knowing Too Much To Ever Go Back

Day 302

Knowing Too Much To Ever Go Back

Thank you for your supportive comments to last night's blog. After re-reading my writing and the many comments and e-mails, I realized that I need to ease up a bit on myself. Not “take it easy” ease up, but I need to realize that there honestly is no turning back now. I need to get that fear out of my head. I couldn't change my brain back to the old eating habits if I tried. Seriously, fitness and life coach Melissa Walden put it best... “you know too much to ever go back.” And as far as the exercise is concerned, it's not the end of the world if I occasionally take a day of rest from working out. I guess when it's such a part of the daily routine, and then I miss, it reminds me of a time when I didn't concern myself with exercise. But those days are long gone. I need to get over myself, geez. The number one thing I tell people that ask for advice is “be consistent!” Consistency has played a major role in my success so far, so when I show any inconsistency, it drives me nuts. But we're human and it isn't going to be perfect. In contrast to some of the hard struggles some are experiencing, my post must have sounded like a little spoiled baby pouting. I'm over that. Onward and downward we go!

I stopped by to see a friend that I know is struggling today. I wasn't there to verbally attack him or offer a tough love speech about how important this is, I was simply there. He could see the difference in me even since the last time we were face to face. I honestly didn't have to say a word. I know where he's stuck. I've been stuck in that place many times. It's a place where we allow our world of stress and circumstance to pull us down into a dark place where nothing matters anymore. The fact that losing weight and getting healthy can only improve our overall outlook in these tough situations becomes completely lost. It's easy to give in to our emotions, to decide that “with everything going the way it's going, I just can't stay focused.” But don't let those circumstances steal away your life. Decide that no matter what comes along—nothing is going to take this away from you. It can try, it can take everything else, but not this. It's too important. We're talking life and death here. The positive effects of losing weight are so numerous and powerful, it can make a bad situation seem a little better, and a desperate situation seem a little less hopeless. I've never shared personal financial circumstances or details of just how stressful my journey has been at times, and I'm not starting now—I never will, wouldn't be appropriate. But let me say this: If I allowed my stress and personal circumstances to rule my journey, it would have ended flat out on day 2. Only a handful of people know what struggles we've faced and continue to face along this ride, I say this because I don't want you to think 'easy for you to say Sean.' Everything I'm saying, I say from experience. If you're lost on your journey, I just want to hold up a light on the road so you can find your way back, because that detour you're taking is a dead end my friend.

I took a nap in the late afternoon and ended up sleeping a little longer than I wanted. Sometimes I think the body just takes over and says “uh, excuse me, I need re-charged, like right now.” The girls tried to wake me for a YMCA workout, they were unsuccessful---and I was so tired I didn't even remember their attempt. But they did go and they logged a wonderful workout. That's cool, even when “the leader” is sleeping, they know exactly what to do and how to do it. I'm so very proud of them! Oh, you can bet, especially after last night's situation, I'm getting a workout! I'm fixing to head out to the trail to get my sweat on...and it will not be hard, because after temps rose above 100 F today, it's still ninety degrees with high humidity out there. Courtney is insisting on going with me, it'll be her second workout of the evening. When you're feeling as good as she is lately about her progress, it's hard to keep her down. She's ready to go workout at a moments notice. And these girls are really overprotective of their daddy. They don't like it when I go out there to a dark trail by myself. Daddy might get mugged! It would take a really deranged mugger to approach me at 6'3 and 316 pounds. I may not be real tough, but they don't know that...unless they read my blog. But I doubt that any muggers read my blog. Courtney is going to make me erase this. “Dad, what if somebody reads that and learns you're an easy target?” Sweety, they'll be really disappointed! Maybe surprised at my new Ninja type quickness...And after they listen to my iPod, they'll be confused at what I consider “workout songs,” Jason Mraz-I'm Yours, how is that a workout song? Sailing—Christopher Cross?? This guy is nuts! They'll listen and get so introspective, they'll hunt me down and give it back with apologies.

I hope everything is well in your world. I sincerely appreciate you reading and giving me your feedback. Many times the comments have opened my eyes to the reality of my sometimes silliness. I'm doing great, we're headed to a place we once dreamed of, and the rewards and scenery along the way are benefits that only come with a consistent positive effort. Not a perfect effort, striving for absolute perfection is a sure way to find undeserving disappointment. No, just a consistent positive effort will do just fine. Goodnight and...

Good Choices,


  1. Great comments on the journey aspect of weight loss, especially what you said about not letting life get in the way. You are a testament to this rule!!

    I am noooot a good napper. If I go to sleep, I'm down for the count! See ya in six hours haha

    So glad you are in better spirits today :) Have fun getting your sweat on!

  2. I am even a little concerned about your workout music...

    I get so wound up when one of the aspects of my calorie or workout routines gets messed up. Unfortunately it usually comes out in a calorie temper tantrum! It does less damage to not exercise than to blow up your day with some snacks.

    I think that you are aware of the tendency to skip the exercise, and therefore you will be able to moderate it. It is something that concerns you, and usually when there is that level of care- you will focus on it and conquer it. You might want to find a compromise with the exercise program and give yourself the break you need on those killer 100 hour days... It might free you up to commit on the days you have time...

    You are kicking ass either way!!

  3. Oh. I meant to add... I know that I have a fear of gaining "the" weight again. It seems that it is a common fear that keeps many from ever going there again. I think you have that, and I think it is healthy.

    Have a wonderful tomorrow!!

  4. AH MAN , LOVE "Sailing!" I finally remembered to search for it in ..but i didn't know the name of the singer..never had. so i'm just typing sailing because I was hoping that was the song...using common sense of course! I found it and some remixes of it too. pretty cool.

    Yeah, we are our own worst enemy alot of the time in life...especially when it's a mind over matter thing. . .which most situations are; and while I did miss your blog post last night I can sorta kinda get the gist of it from this post.

    meh, sometimes we have to have a lil moment where we just whine!

  5. I KNEW you'd hit the trail again today!! You're committed....I absolutely ADORE what you said about knowing too much to go back now....totally, totally true. I learn more and more every day. Stop by my blog and check out tonight's post to see what I learned from Jillian Michaels's from her book "Master Your Metabolism"....good stuff. :)

  6. Do you ever read your comments from people and stand amazed at how many lives you have touched? DH calls us groupies. Whatever! Hey--I have an article for you on how NZ ranks #3 in the world for obesity behind the US and Mexico. So we need you buddy! Glad you are keeping it all in perspective and so glad that you have Courtney to protect you on your walk! Blessings--Bonnie

  7. Thanks, Sean. That second paragraph is just what I needed today.

  8. There is nothing like a girls love for her dad, enjoy it:)

    I agree with Bonnie: We Do Need You,

    I relish reading your blog each day, there is always something there that strikes a chord with me


    (Sean A. Groupie) LOL

  9. Oh, so you think you are the leader, do you? I beg to disagree, lol (just teasing!).

    Although there will be some who think "easy for you to say", I know that it can never be easy. Granted, it does get more habitual as time goes on, but there are still many battles that we fight along the way and life doesn't start smelling of roses, just because we are losing weight.

    Glad you are rested up now - enjoy your workout!

  10. sailing? are you talking time life 70s? that is the greatest cd compilation ever. hopefully you listen to it all, all the time. anyway, yeah, even though it gets tough at times, doesnt it seem like you could never go back to the way it was? i mean with what you know now. and i mean, not for an extended period. anyway, keep it up!

  11. The biggest fear is going back...and the Dr. is right, you know to much to do that! I just told Jim last night after he looked back on old pictures...there is just no excuse for the weight we gained. It's all about moderation..."Eat to live,Don't live to eat!" Wow that is deep for 5:30am...keep it up!


  12. Sean, would you like me to send you my running playlist. Nothing wrong with either of the songs you mentioned - but for getting your sweat on? Seriously dude!

  13. I never want to go back to the life I had before. I hated that life. Good post as always Sean.

  14. "Not a perfect effort, striving for absolute perfection is a sure way to find undeserving disappointment."

    This is what I wanted to tell you yesterday, but I just didn't know how. Trying to be perfect is how we got here in the first place! Life is not about being perfect, it's about being balanced!

    I am glad that you are in a better place mentally today. You don't have the right to beat yourself up, haha. So, you didn't exercise one day... you know what to do now! (Who does that sound like?!)

    Well, I hope you have a wonderful, blessed day today! Take care of yourself!


  15. I need your life to slow down so you will have time to read my blog and chew me out if I mess up again! :)
    I'm glad you are doing so well!!!!!!

  16. Sean, you are an inspiration as well as an awesome influence! I really needed to read todays post, so thanks for the pep talk.
    Keep up the great work!
    Not so sure about the running to "Sailing" though!^_^

  17. Knowing too much to ever go back.

    That really sums it up in a nutshell.

    The journey you've made will make you appreciate the end result even more.

  18. Thanks so much for your post! Again, you seem to hit exactly what I need to hear when I need to hear it:)

    You are awesome!

  19. Another inspirational day in the life of Sean. Thanks


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