Friday, January 22, 2016

January 22nd, 2016 Impossible Times

January 22nd, 2016 Impossible Times

Part of my early morning routine is assessing the day ahead. I'm looking for possible challenges and ideas on how to navigate around them or through them while making sure the fundamental elements of my recovery remain intact. Today presented many challenges.

Finally, I can blame lack of rest on something other than my own poor choices. This steroid pack I'm working through seems to mess with my internal clock.

The main challenge today was realizing my schedule likely wouldn't allow for an afternoon nap of any kind. And my assessment was spot on. 

My ability to make today a good one was all about the attitude I chose to embrace. I refused to get grumpy. I did get a short mid-afternoon break that really wasn't long enough for a nap but was long enough for me to hang out with Noah. Little man really wanted to go outside. He didn't care how cold it was. He wanted to run. So I let him. And I chased him. I pretended like I was trying to catch him but couldn't and it made him laugh so hard. I love to hear his laugh. Finally, I had to pick him up and carry him inside--and he was NOT happy about this in the slightest. It was a good mid-afternoon break before heading off for other work related duties.

My car finally made it out after two weeks in the shop. It was good to get it back and drive my own car again, especially today, a day that included driving two different vehicles not my own.

I took care today. Even though challenged with a packed schedule--I took care. This life I'm choosing to live has proven many things to me and one of those is, no matter the speed of the day, I can still pause long enough to make good choices along the way. I can still prepare good food. I can still pack and plan food that fits into the day's schedule. I can still interact with friends in support. I can still make the right moves that are in harmony with my goals. I once believed this to be impossible.

But as I look back on those impossible times, I realize what was missing. It wasn't a way. It was my will. I hadn't the will. As soon as life became challenging I'd abandon any semblance of a plan designed for continued positive progress. I'm too busy to worry about that stuff, was a common refrain.

Now it's like this: These elements of my recovery are non-negotiable, so if the day has the potential to get crazy, I best have a plan in place that gives me the best chance of maintaining their integrity.

What's amazing is how in adopting this approach, it actually strengthens the day instead of getting in the way. It does, in my opinion, because it provides a nice measure of calm and certainty in a world with occasional chaos and uncertainty. 

I made it home a little after 8pm this evening. I changed into my "I'm in for the evening" outfit and immediately started preparing a late dinner. It was incredibly delicious. Oh my... I loved dinner tonight. It was a late one, but worth the wait. 

Then, a little while after--about 10pm, I laid down and slept until midnight. Why? Great question! I've been itching to tell you but couldn't until it was official!

Because I'm fine tuning a stand-up set for a big show tomorrow night. I needed a sharp, well rested mind--and that super late two hour nap gave me just what I needed. I'll be up until 3:30am--but, I get to sleep in as long as I need, to be as rested as possible for tomorrow night's big show.

I've been asked to open the big Smokey Robinson concert with a relatively short, sweet and funny stand-up set. The concert is at a big casino venue about twenty-five minutes from my apartment. I'm super excited!! Big stage, big lights, big crowd--and doing stand-up, something that brings me immense joy!! And however it goes, I'll still get to experience that joy. And if it goes really well, I may receive more opportunities to open for big name concerts, right down the road from where I live. It's another wonderful outlet for an important core element of me! I'll let you know how it goes.

Okay--I've work to do! Goodnight! Or, uh--good morning!

My Tweets Today:

Thank you for reading and your continued support,


  1. What exciting news, Sean! I am sure it will be great!


  2. Good luck on your big show. Sending happy, thoughtful vibes your way!!!

  3. That is so awesome! I know you are going to do great!


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