Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.
Although my turnaround from relapse/regain started in late April 2014, I consider May 1st the anniversary. I remember feeling incredibly unsteady, nervous really because it had become very clear what was on the line. More importantly, it had become clear the level of acceptance, level of commitment, and level of sacredness these new actions would require in order for me to escape.
It was an escape. I didn't do it alone--from the perspective of how I had to stop knowing it all, stop talking, start watching and listening, and start doing--it was more like a rescue mission and the hands I was reaching for belonged to the ones who had gone before me. I'm incredibly grateful for the friendship and guidance from Gerri Helms as well as the additional words and advice from people like Dr. Marty Lerner.
When I initially hit my "goal" weight, I really thought that was it and the plan I created was the plan, by golly. I had so much to learn. I'm grateful for the humbling experience of the relapse/regain period that followed that initial "arrival." I had no idea at the time that I was arriving at a place completely different than I imagined. I hadn't a clue that the biggest lessons and practices were ahead of me.
I was on a crash course with the truth and it was an unrelenting truth.
My daily practice requires me to stay humble. It requires me to keep an open mind. It requires me to listen. It requires me to be willing to do the actions that help keep me well.
It doesn't require me to know everything. That's wonderful because I don't.
All I know is, if I keep making this daily practice important and if I keep allowing it to evolve and I keep my eyes, ears, heart, and mind open, then I'll have the best chance for continued wellness.
|Photo on the left at the very top of my 164-pound relapse/regain|
Photo on right is in maintenance at a healthy body weight.
Thank you for reading and your continued support,