Wednesday, November 19, 2014

November 19th, 2014 Pieces Get Lost

November 19th, 2014 Pieces Get Lost

Exploring last night's blog and taking it from my brain to the screen was really good for me. This is why I highly recommend keeping a journal, blogging--something enabling you to get those thoughts and ideas on paper or virtual paper, then working through them like a puzzle--putting them together. When the pieces seem to fit, big epiphanies can happen. We're talking transformative stuff, my friend. If I try to keep it in my head, pieces get lost too easily.

For me, writing yesterday's post brought up several examples in my past where I didn't allow my emotions to run their course. The biggest example for me was the loss of my little brother, Shane, who died unexpectedly at the age of twenty-four. It's been thirteen years since his passing and I still have a very hard time with it all, especially when I hear one of the songs we mutually enjoyed. The more I thought about it, the bigger the list became--and all I can do, is acknowledge and move forward, and when the opportunity to feel comes up again, I'm sure I'll be less opposed to running the other way and more willing to embrace the natural and cleansing process of my emotions.

One of the things I didn't write about was how the emotional eating, for me, started first--and somewhere along the way, my brain was trained to react in certain ways--and that's when I added the element of addiction to the mix. The combination of emotional eating and food addiction seems to be quite the tag team champion in this battle many of us face. But it doesn't mean we can't take the title back. We can have a long and successful run as our own champion! 

My brain had a very hard time shutting down last night. Even with the melatonin--I laid awake until after 1am. Getting up three and a half hours later was a challenge. This sleep deficit refused to be ignored, so as soon as 2pm hit, I left the studio and came home for a good nap. Yeah...it was a little too good. I slept like a rock--good, quality, deep sleep--you know, the kind where you wake up and you're disoriented, thinking perhaps you overslept the next day when the clock says 5:45pm, but in your fogginess you were convinced it was AM--and panic ensues long enough for reality to become clear...then you're relieved, but now you realize it'll be a challenge to go to bed later... Yeah, all that.

I decided to make the most of my wide awake evening by catching up on some emails and a couple of phone calls to friends I needed to call back, then cooking a fabulous dinner, followed by a nice workout at the YMCA.

I'm feeling well. I'm nice and calm, relaxed and confident, thinking clearly and taking it one day at a time, as always. I'm sticking very close to the fundamentals of my plan, as if my personal hazard lights are flashing, signaling me to pay close attention and take extra precautions to protect my path.  
My Tweets today:
















Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

6 comments:

  1. Bravo my friend, you are truly an inspiration to us all.

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    1. Michael, thank you very much. I look forward to another visit sometime!

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  2. Sounds like you opened the door to all sorts of revelations behind the "why" you react or choose to react the way you do. That is a huge step in our growth. Guess the writing puts our thoughts solidly in front of us so we can see clearly. "I can see clearly now the rain is gone" kind of thing. When this first happened to me I thought it was the area I was standing in that brought the clarity. Realized later it was the "method" and being ready to face the truth, not the area I was in, bringing enlightenment. I am so happy that not only did you get the clarity on the one item, but that it went on to reveal many more things. From what I know (check with Geri on this) it is very tiring. You needed all that deep sleep to re-energize. Let's all keep the "digging" what is underneath why we are turning to food to help us make it through the day, going. Plus sharing it here.
    N~

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    1. "When this first happened to me I thought it was the area I was standing in that brought the clarity. Realized later it was the "method" and being ready to face the truth, not the area I was in, bringing enlightenment."-- Nice, Nancy!! It is tiring--and I'm headed to be super early tonight, too! Thank you, Nancy!

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  3. Sean, I think meditation can play a significant role in managing those events. Might be worth incorporating into the practice you're developing.

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    1. Lance, you're so right. Absolutely will do this.

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