Wednesday, August 5, 2015

August 5th, 2015 Weigh Day Edition

August 5th, 2015 Weigh Day Edition

I certainly wasn't expecting a ten pound drop. This morning's weigh-in at the doctor's office, to me, proves that the two pound gain from the previous three week period was a case of natural fluctuation due to water retention and various other reasons our bodies might weigh a little more on any particular day. I lost the water weight and whatever else was weighing me down three weeks ago--and likely added four or five pounds of actual weight loss to bring it down ten pounds. At least that's my guess. I was very surprised to find this number today:
 photo A2022020weigh20day20scale20photo_zpswvofodge.jpg
I haven't weighed 220 pounds since I was eleven years old. 

My goal now isn't to lose weight. My goal is to maintain the elements of my recovery while finding my personal balance, maintaining a healthy weight.

Does it mean I add more food? Likely. More strength training? Absolutely imperative!! Weighing more often than every three weeks? Yes. This was a suggestion from Life Coach Gerri and I think it's a really good one. I will weigh again next Wednesday and every Wednesday after, for a couple months.

I feel fantastic.

It was a super long day today. I overcame a very rough start and ended up making it a good one. I didn't get back home until almost 6:30pm and by that time, I wasn't thinking about dinner--all I could think about was getting a nap. I didn't care about it being so late. I needed an hour. Without it, I likely would have skipped dinner, skipped my test run tonight and skipped the blog---passed out for the night. I took what I needed. I got up after an hour, made coffee--and prepared a fantastic dinner. It was incredibly delicious!! (see dinner tweets below).

My test run went very well tonight. At one point, I jogged almost three minutes without stopping!! The shoes made a HUGE difference. No pain afterwards! My phone was giving me fits as I tried to update it in order to support the C25K app--so I still need to figure that out. In the meantime, this test run tonight gave me valuable information about where in the program I should start. I have less than seven weeks to be ready for the Carter's Run 5k at Lake Ponca. I will run the duration of that 3.1 miles!! 

Dropping into the pillow tonight and feeling very well. I know I have some adjustments to make in my approach. I certainly don't need to keep losing--and obviously what I'm doing is still in line with weight loss for my body/metabolism. I will consider my options carefully and make those adjustments! If you would have told me in April 2014, that I would have this "problem," while I was at the top of my regain/relapse period-I wouldn't have believed you. I'm incredibly grateful.This whole turnaround from relapse/regain has been a monumental blessing. And it started with the blessing of experiencing the relapse/regain period to begin with...I needed to go through that time in order to learn things I really needed to learn.

My Tweets Today:

Thank you for reading and your continued support,


  1. I honestly feel really worried about the amount of weight you've lost over the past six weeks. You're still losing more than a pound a week on average. I was the one who calculated your maintenance calories a while back based on the fact that you were losing over 2lb/week on 1700 calories/day and said that you would need to eat more than 2000 calories/day to maintain. You've been eating about 1800 calories a day over the past six weeks and netted a 1.6lb/week loss — that translates to about an 800 calorie/day deficit. I don't check in with your MFP but I noticed from the screenshots you occasionally post here that it seems like sometimes you end a day with far fewer than 1800 calories after exercise so I'm not going to tell you that you should be eating 2600 calories/day, but I will say that I'm really worried that you're going to continue losing weight at what's honestly kind of an alarming rate if you don't break out of the diet mindset a little bit. You're not eating enough.

    It's okay and probably necessary for you to eat a minimum of 2000 calories a day. It's imperative to eat back all of your exercise calories, especially if you're going to start running. It's important to make sure you get enough protein, and to prioritise strength training. I'm speaking from a place of setting out to lose 20lbs last year and overshooting, losing far too much weight, and developing some really unhealthy attitudes towards food and exercise, not eating enough, obsessing over calories, becoming underweight, and I find it a little frightening to see what looks to me like someone at the beginning of that same journey. You could tell from the fit of your clothes (which is a much better indicator) that you had lost weight before your last weigh-in, the scale got inside your head even though it was impossible for you to gain weight going from 1700 to 1800 calories/day. It's difficult to let go of some of the mindsets we develop during weight loss but it's really important for our mental and physical health to do so. Anyway, you know yourself best but I just wanted to give you some food for though. Good luck!

    1. Anonymous, thank you very much. I can clearly see that you're genuinely concerned and the advice you're gifting me is from a wonderful place.
      I agree that I need to eat more--or more calorie dense/nutrient dense choices. You see everything I eat and to me, it seems like enough--I don't feel the least bit deprived.
      Now--coming out of weight loss mode and into maintenance mode, it's a challenge to convince my brain that more is okay. It's a psychological thing...
      It's like a quantity past a certain point triggers an alarm in my "recovery" sensors. Going in and rewiring the system to accept a little more, is difficult to do. It's necessary and I believe with small changes and continually evolving my approach, I'll find the groove that works well.
      Thank you for all of the effort and analysis you've put into this comment. I sincerely appreciate it.
      Good food for thought!!

  2. Wow! Just doing great Sean! Are you 6' 3"? If so, that is a BMI of about 27? You have been SO busy, I'm not surprised that this summer has shred some pounds. I just had an omelet with avocado, and it is really filling. Thanks for all of the meal reporting as it has given me some low calorie, healthy ideas!!!

    1. I am 6'3". I love,I mean LOVE the avocado omelet!! Glad you do too! Thank you for your appreciation. I have zero plans to stop! More food tweets coming every day! Megan, you're awesome!

  3. Well you know I'm a runner so I'm going to second the fact that correct shoes do matter, very much! Glad to know you're getting that straightened out.

    Maintenance is a state of being unto itself isn't it. Very difficult to get out of the losing weight mindset/way of being/way of eating into finding what works to just maintain weight within a reasonable range. I agree with Geri that for you, weighing weekly now might be best. That way you can adjust immediately. I have no doubt you'll find your way.

    1. Helen--so true: "Very difficult to get out of the losing weight mindset/way of being/way of eating into finding what works to just maintain weight within a reasonable range."
      It's a process. I feel like if I continue holding the importance level of what I do in the highest, I'll be okay as I make subtle changes in the transition.
      Yes--the running shoes. They're amazing shoes!!! I feel like I can totally get to 3.1miles without stopping by the end of September.

  4. Anonymous seems to know it all about weight loss. Wonder why all he does is comment on blogs. Shouldn't he be running a Weight Loss Program somewhere with all these great insights he has? People like him just bug the crap out of me. How can they think they know more than a person who has lost weight (a couple times now!) successfully? You know what works for you, and are experimenting with maintenance, which is the BEST way to go about it. Okay, I'm done with my rant. But it truly pisses me off when somebody tells ME how to lose weight, or how to maintain. WHY do they think they know more than I know about my own body?

    So proud of you Sean for turning it around. I am working on doing the same thing right now, and hopefully can make it back to my goal by the end of the year. "This whole turnaround from relapse/regain has been a monumental blessing," might be over-stating it a bit however. I think there was a heckuva lot of hard work and dedication by you that was responsible for the turnaround as well. I am so happy for you and plan to be joining you back at my own goal weight very very soon! Thanks so much for continuing to inspire me.

    1. My comment came from a place of genuine concern and worry from having been there, not from a place of "knowing it all" or "knowing [your] body better than [you]" (??? what).

      Oh, and I'm not a dude.

    2. Also, I wanted to add a couple of things:

      I feel like you're interpreting my comment as if I'm someone who'd go up to someone who's still in active weight loss and tell them that they're "getting too thin" and that they should stop. But Sean has stated from the beginning and in this post that his aim is to maintain around 230lbs, and he's still losing weight at what most people would consider quite a clip. So I offered some friendly advice about what I felt a more appropriate calorie intake might be, given that he's still losing weight quite quickly and probably doesn't want to get to a point where he would need to start thinking about putting weight back on (this is a really stressful transition to make, again, having been there). It's not like I told Sean to start eating 5000 calories/day and stop exercising. I suggested a small increase of about 200 calories/day and eating back exercise calories. I don't think that's a particularly off-the-wall suggestion or worthy of sarcasm or personal attacks.

      So, cool. You know what works for you. That's great. That doesn't mean that anyone who comes along and tries to offer some suggestions about how to better achieve your goals and what they think will happen if you don't make some changes "knows it all" or is trying to tell you what to do and it's pretty rude and dismissive to act like that's the case. If you don't want to listen to or take advice — don't. But there's no need to rudely attack the person who saw that what you were doing didn't seem to be in alignment with your goals and offered some advice based on their own experience.

    3. I for one didn't think you were being a know it all as that one lady did. I could tell you were genuinely concerned. I guess people interpret things so totally different, wow!

    4. Dupster, I appreciate your passion and I understand from where it comes. For me, it's all about from whom it comes and if there's a genuine concern behind the suggestions. I did feel that from anonymous.
      Along this road, we're trying to find the balance that works for us--each of us is different... and at the same time, many of the dynamics are the same.
      I have a fearful respect for regain/relapse, having experienced a massive one--and this makes it exceptionally hard for me to "allow" myself to eat more than I do. But I also don't want to lose too much. At 220, I don't feel like it's too much--and I know with continued weight training--making that important, I'll add muscle and be okay...especially as I add calories from good sources, to help the direction my body is going.
      The wonderful news is-- My main focus is maintaining the elements of my recovery--as long as I maintain those--I can make adjustments within the bounds, and be perfectly fine.
      I'm not giving way to the binge and I'm not eating excessively--and that's a wonderful thing.
      Shifting my perspective enough to add the necessary nutrition to maintain weight while taking care in the fitness arena--without triggering my internal alarm that says, danger-danger-danger--you're eating too much-- is very important.
      To me, it's all a part of getting off the merry go round of Lose-gain-lose-gain--and walking over to the bench in the park and just absorbing the beautiful scenery--and the harmony and balance of it all. Finding that personal balance is the thing. That's what I'm working on!

  5. Wow, quite a surprise! Wondering if you're considering getting your metabolic rate tested (or even if there's any place to do that), and/or body fat percentage? Those might be better figures to have, going forward, to watch your lean muscle mass increase, and body fat decrease. Might give you a different perspective? Three cheers to maintenance!

    1. Anonymous--great suggestions. I'll ask my doctor about the metabolic rate test and the body fat percentage test. It could help me reframe my perspective, for sure!

  6. Sean,

    I suggest that any comment you hear that contains 'concern' let it roll right off. At 370 how many folks looked you in the eye and said 'you should consider change, you're 370, this is a problem, some solutions are x, y, z.' No, people don't come straight out and say those things "They are trying to be polite?" When I lost weight SO many more people felt empowered to speak out loud about what I should do, where I should go, etc.

    I wish concerned people would really really step up when I'm 370, and when I am at 220....just like Noah...."I'm 220, I got this!"

    You got this. "Don't lose more weight" "Maybe this is wrong" "maybe that is wrong".....etc... You got this, you are in charge, you clearly are doing EVERYTHING as right as you possible can.

    BTW: Congrats, doing everything you possible can right is really hard work and you are doing it.


    1. Chris, thank you. I'm feeling my way about. And I'm truly feeling confident I'll find the balance moving forward.
      The effort and detail someone puts into a long analysis like some I've received, is very impressive and I must acknowledge that support and consideration. At the same time, I'm not working myself up into a tizzy about all of this. I seriously feel like, as long as I continue to make my recovery principles important--and I maintain the integrity in those elements--then I'll be able to make adjustments that will lead to helping me maintain.
      The increased physical fitness is the wild card. I plan on continuing to develop my running legs--I'd like to eventually get into boxing workouts (if I can find a gym for that) and getting back into Yoga is on my list--and getting with a good trainer for strength training...and all of these things will suggest I add some good calories to my daily budget.
      The key then becomes--shifting my perspective enough to not be alarmed by the increased calories and just be at peace with it all... Coming from weight loss mode combined with my fearful respect of the relapse/regain dynamic, it's a little challenging.
      Thank you, Chris, very much for the compliments.
      I'm confident I will find the personal balance I need moving forward.

  7. Oh yeah, one other thing. This week take 100 pictures, you don't have to post them or even look at them, but just have them. You in running gear, you at work, you holding a family member, you sitting, you standing, you running.
    100 pictures this week. They are basically free, and you won't possibly resent having them around. 100. Do it! (You can post some of them :)


    1. The 100 pictures thing. Very VERY interesting concept. I think I understand very well why you're suggesting this. I'm working on it. I need to have a photog follow me around for a day and snap when I'm not expecting.

  8. Wooza Sean! That is freaking amazing! I'd give my eye teeth for that loss! I know you don't want to lose anymore but its still amazing.
    Nice run!
    Go get Sir! :)

    1. Rosie, I don't think I've ever heard that expression! Thank you!!

  9. Great job! My only concern is your loose skin that might weigh 20-30 pounds. That would mean your weight is actually under 200 which is thin for a 6' 3 man. However, as long as you are healthy, that would be fine. One can always gain weight by drinking Ensure or Boost which are both full of vitamins (probably sugar though).

    1. The loose skin is absolutely another wild card in the mix. I have no idea how much the excess skin weighs.
      I do believe with increased calories and good workouts, it'll all work itself out. I'm willing to make adjustments as needed to maintain a good balance.
      I once wrote about a "gradual evolution of good choices" describing food choices along the way and how what I would eat years ago, isn't what I choose today--but what I ate back then was important, because it's where I was at the time...and now, I've naturally evolved into better eating habits and choices. I think it'll be the same with maintenance mode. I'll evolve as I move forward and as long as I keep holding the elements of my recovery sacred--as a foundation for everything else, then I'll be in a good place for continued success.
      I looked at some height/weights of NBA prospects (at the suggestion of a friend)... and here's what I found:
      Point Guards: Average was 6'2", 190 lbs. Smallest starter was 5'11", and tallest was 6'8". The lowest weight was 160 lbs., and the heaviest was 223 lbs.
      Shooting Guards: Average size was 6'6", 211 lbs. Smallest starter was 6'3", and tallest was 6'9". The lowest weight was 188 lbs., and the heaviest was 240 lbs.

      Small Forwards: Average size was 6'8", 224 lbs. Smallest starter was 6'5", and tallest was 6'10". The lowest weight was 195 lbs., and the heaviest was 260 lbs.

      Of course--these players are solid--lean, lots of muscle--very fit. I aspire to be fit, too. Perhaps not NBA fit, but as lean as i can be in that direction.
      Given all of the factors-- loose skin removal someday, increased strength training, increased overall fitness...I could very well end up a lean 215-220 someday. Who knows?
      As long as I continue to take extraordinary care, I'll be okay, no matter what...and what defines "extraordinary care" will evolve like everything else along this road.

  10. Well I'm not surprised you lost more weight you're still still doing what you've been doing all along. You look awesome and I'm completely amazed at your mind set. I wish I could get there,struggling!! And I do think I've got a sugar problem!

    1. Robin, as far as the fundamental elements of my recovery, I don't see changing least I hope and pray I don't! The things that will change are pieces that will fit within my fundamental elements of recovery.
      Thank you for the compliment, I feel great, truly!!
      Don't give up, Robin. If you feel like sugar is your substance, like me--the best way to find out is to try 10 days without any refined sugar. I've written extensively about what a monumental difference it's made for me. If you do abstain, I sincerely wish you the same kind of life changing experience.

  11. Might just try this, but I'm betting its harder than it sounds because sugar is in everything, lol!!!


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