Friday, March 18, 2016

March 18th, 2016 I'm NOT The Hero

March 18th, 2016 I'm NOT The Hero

Today was poised to challenge everything about my plan. And it did. If you read last night's edition, you know how it started. Today started last night with what I felt was a well justified nap--and to a degree it was, but would have been better had I held on a little bit longer, finished a few things and made it for the entire night--not a nap. Instead, what happened as a consequence set up a day that required sharp awareness on very little sleep.

I couldn't go back to sleep last night. That nap was solid. It was restful in every way. It totally energized me to the point of not being able to go back to sleep until after 4am. I tossed and turned--gave up, listened to an NPR podcast--turned it off, tried to shut down---still nothing. And the later it became, the more worried I was about today. I had the alarm set for 4:45am. I was up for the day shortly before 5am.

Had this been a normal day, I likely would have opted for a sick day. But we have a studio colleague out, recovering from knee replacement surgery--and I'm covering, the same as she would do for me in a similar situation. Short staffed means very little room for sick days except in the most extreme cases. And we had a big location broadcast involving two radio stations broadcasting simultaneously for four hours straight--eight breaks an hour, I had to be on top of this. Honestly--I was seriously concerned about my ability to make it all work out, today.

Before the wrong impression is communicated here--let me be clear--Today's story isn't about how strong I am or how I somehow pulled it together despite all the odds against me. No. I'm NOT the hero in this story.

The hero was the plan. It started first thing during my morning spiritual dialogue. It continued with a well defined food plan. It was supported by like minded support buddies--at the ready, communicating with me at various times throughout the day. I was tired, but sharp--which is a strange combination--and I stayed aware of the potential danger lurking if I didn't embrace the rails of my plan on this challenging day.

The food plan was important. With lunch provided at the location broadcast--an assortment of cookies, chips and high quality hotdogs--all premium items, and free to staff and customers--but not on my food plan--not free to me...I needed my plan. I planned, prepared and packed my lunch--and it was just what I needed to help me through. I leaned heavily on coffee to help me out--and although the eight breaks an hour--which translates to roughly 24 minutes of constant talking per hour--12 minutes for each station--I still made a few quick support texts during. When the broadcast wrapped--I had spent about an hour and thirty-six minutes of total talking between the two stations--in a four hour period. That's a challenge even for any well rested person. I'm grateful my voice somehow held up. That was an answer to a prayer, for sure!

I likely overcompensated on my performance. I couldn't allow anything less than a good broadcast considering the investment the client had made. And it worked well. The broadcast was a success--even acknowledged by the client in that way. And as it drew to a close, I was getting much closer to being able to get home and finally grab some more rest.

I exchanged the station vehicle for my own, made a quick grocery store run for a couple of items I needed for dinner--and another coffee, then headed back to the studio to finish up whatever needed finished in the production studio.

I made it home a little after 4pm. I quickly caught up with the teleconference support group exclusive facebook page and prepared for two quick one-on-one phone appointments. I tried to postpone the second one, but it was extremely urgent--so I went ahead and proceeded, knowing that I was minutes away from the nap I had my eye on all day long. This upcoming nap wasn't one I could regret in any way, shape or form--because the rest of my weekend is clear--no work duties--no stand-up performances---just catching up on rest and concentrating on feeling better.

"Have you been drinking?"  Obviously, by the time I reached that second call--I was starting to show significant decline in speech and clarity. No, in answer to the question on the other end of the phone--I hadn't been drinking anything but water and coffee all day. I'm not a drinker, thank God.

But I'm a food addict deluxe. And for that reason, it took this high level of care today to help me make it through. I know me--I know, without the rails of support--from the spiritual, to the food planning--to the support connections--I wouldn't have had a very good day at all. It could have been a complete disaster.

The plan was my hero.

The wrap up to this day was refreshing. I woke after an hour and a half nap--ready for a great Friday evening. I enjoyed the best cup of coffee--and settled into preparing an amazing dinner. I almost talked myself out of a late workout. But I had made an accountability commitment to get it in at some point after a good nap...and I had that good nap---and now, a great meal--and honestly, although I could have easily dismissed the workout tonight and got back in there tomorrow, I decided to get to the gym and enjoy it.

Now--had I been ready to drop back into bed--different story, but I knew I'd be up anyway--with or without the workout--and mentally, the workout simply solidified the unlikely structure of a day that easily could have been an unstructured mess of chaotic destruction. Is that a little over-dramatic? Maybe a touch. But not too far from reality.

I know myself very well. And I know--each day for me, isn't guaranteed. My success each day requires an importance level on the highest. And when my actions from the previous night are not in support of this importance level for the next day---it requires me to quickly get a grip--hold on, say a few prayers--and carefully proceed, guided by the rails of this plan. The plan that provides so much freedom in its embrace. It's interesting how my perspective was once focused on how much I thought the plan had to be restrictive or somehow burdensome and now it's a source of clarity and freedom. Very interesting to me. Very blessed. Very grateful.

My Tweets Today:


































Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

3 comments:

  1. Hey Sean, I ready all your posts and should comment more. I understand what you are saying about the plan being the hero. I really do. However, I want to give you the credit you deserve. Your drive, passion and control play a big part in resisting the day's temptations that are within an arm's length. The plan is a start or a guide for a good day, but the person who is strong enough to follow the plan is a big-time hero in my book. That's you! Way to go Sean, way.to.go.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I read (not ready) all your posts....

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    2. I appreciate you, LTR. Thank you so much for these words of support! Never worry about commenting more, LTR-- You're reading every day, and I appreciate that very much!!

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