Thursday, May 4, 2017

May 4th, 2017 Revisiting Normal

May 4th, 2017 Revisiting Normal

I often get inspired to write about certain dynamics I've experienced along this road. It happens quite frequently--and I love writing, as you know--if you've been around these pages for any length of time, I'm sure you've gathered as much. But after a super long day, I run out of time--and I get into that place where my desire to express my experience starts crowding what I know is best for me in this moment. I'm getting better at reminding myself it's just one day, and it's okay to not, tonight.

Then I remember a post I've written that expresses the same thoughts and experiences--and maybe not exactly what I had in mind on this particular night, but close enough-- and then I decide:

It's time for a DDWL RERUN! But first--a little business to handle...

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget (meaning-I didn't exceed, however, I was 204 calories short of goal), I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, I stayed connected with solid support, and I volunteered some time this evening for a worthy cause (and that feels good).

Okay--the rerun from two and a half years ago! My goodness, time flies!!

From October 21st, 2014 Finding Our Normal

One of the things I've given a lot of thought to lately is, what does it mean to be "normal?" I've concluded "normal" is a relative term. Your normal isn't my normal. We're all different.
Somewhere between 500 and 515lbs

This guy wanted to be normal. He wanted to have a normal relationship with food. He had fixed in his mind a vision of what it meant for him to be normal, you know, like people who are of normal weight with normal eating behaviors who wear normal clothing. To him, in order to be normal, he had to simply eat less and exercise more, yeah--that would be some kind of normal. 

What this guy failed to recognize is, he was already normal. He was his normal.

In order to achieve weight loss success, the perspective on "normal" had to change. It couldn't be someone else's normal, it had to be his own kind of normal.

He could mimic someone else's normal for a while, but eventually his normal would override the abnormal impersonation of normal--and everything would go back to being his normal.

Okay--enough of the third person--it's annoying. What I had to embrace was my normal.

I had to let go of the idea that I wasn't normal because, in that, I was constantly suggesting I wasn't good enough or something was wrong with me. I am good enough and there's nothing wrong with me--as long as I'm not trying to be someone else's normal.

My normal is: I'm addicted to sugar and if consumed, it triggers bio-chemical reactions that send me searching for more and more--and not just sugary items--I'm talking loads of carbs and high fat-- it's on!! Nothing trips my trigger like sugar--it is my normal. So I abstain, one day at a time--and it's my normal and I'm okay. 

I enjoy a drink of alcohol on rare occasion, perhaps once or twice, maybe three times a year. It doesn't negatively effect me beyond a slight feeling of intoxication. It doesn't trip anything for me. That's my normal. I have close friends with decades of sobriety, who--if they tried to mimic my normal, it would ruin their lives for who knows how long, maybe even kill them before they found recovery again. That's their normal. So they abstain, one day at a time, it's their normal and they're okay.

Embracing my normal is imperative to my success. My normal means that I take extraordinary care with food. My normal means no sugar. My normal means I remain active in seeking and offering support. My normal requires my attention and a rock solid commitment in doing what I do for my recovery. I fiercely protect it and never apologize for it.

I know many people who will enjoy their share of Halloween candy in a couple of weeks and it'll not be a big deal at all. That's their normal. If I tried to mimic their normal, you would witness a much different turnaround on these pages.

The biggest key for me to be my best, requires me to embrace and accept my normal, not someone else's. I hope and pray I spend the rest of my life celebrating my normal. Because if I do, I can't lose. 

This is what "finding what works for you" is all about. Sometimes that statement is misunderstood to mean "Find the plan or procedure" that works for you. I'm suggesting that "finding what works" for you and me, starts with honestly defining our personal normal, then fashioning a plan that gives us what we need.

I no longer want to be some idealized version of "normal," I just want to be mine.

Today's Accountability Tweets:

Thank you for reading and your continued support,

1 comment:

  1. Hi Sean I have been following your journey for a long time and I have had both ups and downs more ups than downs and even after you said that you were abstaining from sugar I still struggled with that idea I was getting desperate and I knew my relaionship with food was not serving me. Recently I discovered Brightline Eating very similar concept to your Iron Clad calorie budget but with one difference no sugar and no flour I am 60 days in 30lbs down with no cravings, no hunger this is my new normal I will always have to maintain the 4 Brightlines I have never felt so free of food obsession and eating anxiety I have a brand new life. I am very confident that I will continue and finally be in my right size body thanks so much for you writings and I love the podcasts


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