Tuesday, September 30, 2014

September 30th, 2014 A Difference Maker Day

September 30th, 2014 A Difference Maker Day

I opened my eyes this morning a little after 5am. My radio alarm clock was playing my radio station softly, not alarmingly. This explains why I slept an extra 40 minutes this morning. It did start me in a rush and as it turns out, the extra 40 minutes might have been a difference maker.

Today was right on time despite the late start and the frantic rush to the studio at 6am. I slept 5 hours and although I needed more, that's still on average, an hour more--and sometimes 1.5 hours more than I typically get at night. I say "at night" because I often supplement my sleep with daytime naps. The problem with daytime naps is obvious: It pushes everything back, I end up getting to bed super late and then the pattern repeats again and again. Last night's 5 hours might have been a difference maker.

I didn't think I could do it. Between 1 and 2pm, right before calling it a workday, my eyes starting getting super heavy. I felt like I could have slept for hours right there in the studio with the mic in my face and the headphones on. There was a moment where I told myself, you have to nap when you get home!! But then I got up and started moving around. I didn't go for coffee--I just started moving around. I had some errands to run after work, I needed to pay some bills--stop at the bank, those type of things...and I did. And at some point I made the decision that there wouldn't be an afternoon nap.

I decided to get home, take care of some business online--change, fix a Shakeology shake, drink it while my phone charged--then head to the YMCA. Oh, by the way-- I stopped at Sonic on the way home for ice and a banana. It's probably the healthiest order I've ever shouted into that little speaker-microphone intercom thingy. I likely confused the kids inside: "Did he say ice cream with banana?" "No, man--I think he said a bag of ice and a banana--you better double check, repeat his order." Yes-- a bag of ice and a single banana, please! I did notice a few of the items on the menu--wow. I grabbed my ice and banana from the carhop, told him to keep the 70 cents change and peeled out of there quickly. 

Honestly--it wasn't tempting being there, at all. I love what I'm doing, I love what I'm eating, I love how I feel and I love me. I'm content; downright happy. I do not feel the need to comfort myself from indescribable and hard to explain feelings with the new waffle cone sundae. The urge isn't there. The compulsion isn't there. The clarity is there--and it clearly shows me how wonderful life can be when I'm making what one of our weekly conference call support group members calls "righteous food choices!" I feel great about me and my choices. And I refuse to trade this feeling for anything.

I left the house for the YMCA and the elliptical machine. On my way, I dialed up the little Mexican place down the street from the Y to order dinner. With my conference call tonight--I decided I wasn't cooking. I ordered the Hawaiian Fajitas without most of the things included in the order. I didn't want the flour tortillas, beans, rice, or their guacamole. I forgot to say "no cheese," but it turns out they didn't include very much. I asked for three plain corn taco shells instead and a side of lettuce. Since I declined most everything that comes with the fajitas, they charged me nearly four dollars less than the usual price! I told them to wait a bit and I would pick it up after my workout. I walked into the restaurant and was greeted with, "How was the workout amigo?" I smiled big, "It was good, very good!"

I picked up the fajitas and headed straight for the neighborhood grocery store on the South side of town. I ran in and grabbed some fruit and water, then straight home with just enough time to put dinner on a plate and eat before my 7pm conference call. I was in a groove at this point--right on time!

I proved something to myself today. I proved that sometimes when I think there isn't any way I can go on without a nap--I probably need to get up and move around a little and then convince myself of what it is I need to do. Sometimes a nap may actually be the healthiest choice. Not today, though. I felt energized enough to get things done. I powered through my day and made it just fine. I wasn't whipped during my workout either--it was a really good workout! I pushed it well and feel great about making the decision I made to stay up and get things done. Now I can get more rest. I'm getting to bed even earlier and I'll see what 6 to 6.5 hours feels like! This is real progress in the sleep department.

And these goals we have, you know it's not about perfection, it's about progress--and when I can see the progress and feel it too, like today's experiences, I must smile--because this is what it's all about.

My Tweets today:




















Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

11 comments:

  1. naps are so inviting; congrats on a day of successfully NOT napping! Hope it pays off overnight!

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    1. Oh my, Gwen--yes they are inviting!! A nice comfy bed when our eyes are heavy---yes, it speaks to me!! It did pay off overnight!! Thank you, Gwen!

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  2. So.... As a reader for awhile, I knew you'd struggled with not sleeping enough. [I'm a teacher and mom to 3-chronic undersleeper as well ;) ] But FOUR hours a night?! Is this what I'm reading??? Good grief. Even with naps, I'd die. 6 hours/night is rough enough for me!! I'm glad you enjoyed your extra rest. Your day sounds wonderful :)

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    1. Yeah--it hasn't been good at all. I try to do too much--and I've fallen into a pattern of nap-stay up too late--nap--and again and again... It isn't a pattern I can continue if I truly want to make more sleep a priority. It was a fantastic day! Thank you, Val!

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  3. I think I've said this before as I've thought it for years but IMHO you nap too much and that is why you have chronic night time sleep issues. I understand your schedule can be whacky, especially during tornado season and there may be the occasion when you actually need a nap, but on a daily basis really only babies need to nap lol.

    Think of it this way: if you worked in a traditional job (like I do) if you suddenly got sleepy at 3 p.m., you'd have no choice but to get up and move around - napping is now allowed in the office and I suspect were my boss to come into my office and find me asleep at my desk or worse, laying on the soft carpeted floor, that would be the end of my job.

    What if you were to go the YMCA during the time you want to nap for 2 hours every day? I'd bet it would solve that issue and you'd mostly like sleep very, very well at night.

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    1. You're absolutely correct, Helen!! I've been writing about how I need to and want to change the sleep schedule--but then I've continued doing one of the key elements keeping me from being successful in this regard. It's a case of focusing on the wrong issue. Handling the midday napping issue, as you've suggested, will likely fix the nighttime sleep time problem with little effort. So the effort required isn't later, but earlier in the day.
      What you're suggesting with the Y instead of the nap--is exactly what I did and it worked perfectly. It is the key to me finally getting the rest I need each night.
      Oh--and good point on the weather coverage season around here... very true--those are really the only times naps would be absolutely necessary.
      LOL on the "naps are for babies" part. Thank you Helen!

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  4. Sean, I say this with LOVE and great respect. What is truly keeping you from sleeping a normal night? What is the underlying issue behind needing/wanting/choosing to be so busy that you can't fit sleep in? You know as well as I do that sleep is as essential for your health as good, controlled nutrition and exercise. I think there's a deep answer behind my question and that by coming to terms with it, could be a life changer for you. What feels good about being so busy and important that you don't sleep? I hope I did not over step because that was not my intention. It's just such a recurring theme in your writing and I don't know if you are giving it the importance and attention it needs. It comes down to choice - just like eating does.

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    1. Divad--thank you!
      It is truly a time management issue. I assure you, my schedule doesn't serve a deep seeded purpose of some sort, (at least I don't think)--some kind of need to be busy and feel important. My drive is intended to keep me on track and focused. I devote a large amount of time to writing because it's very important to my recovery and my deeper understanding of what makes me, me. The solution isn't me saying "I'm going to bed earlier tonight." The solution is me managing my time better throughout the day, getting things done I need/want to get done and naturally going to bed at a decent hour because I'm sufficiently tired.
      I've made this schedule and I can modify it for longer periods of sleep.
      I appreciate your input! Thank you, Divad. The importance is in the fundamentals I employ to be successful in reclaiming a healthy weight.

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    2. Or... Maybe it is some deeply ingrained need I'm serving and I just don't realize it! ;) Who knows? In the meantime, I'm going to take better care in my schedule and see what happens.

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  5. Glad that this is on your mind and that your extraordinary care is extending to your sleep patterns. I won't lecture, but will share :) It took me months to get back into a regular sleep pattern. Lack of sleep triggered sleeptalking/walking and other stuff, so I saw a sleep specialist as well.
    Easing into a more scheduled pattern sounds like a good start. Don't hold back from asking for help on this if you need it.

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    1. Nikki-- I somehow missed replying to this yesterday!! It was getting to the point that I had to fully acknowledge what I was doing. I couldn't deny it any longer. I will get help if it becomes something I can't get under control! It's too important to mess around with!

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