December 9th, 2016 A Life Like That
I had a great conversation today with a support friend all about developing a plan "that works for you, indefinitely." I thought--you know, I need to write about this a little more. Then, by amazing coincidence, I did a search of the archives and found a blog post written exactly one year ago today. Isn't that interesting? Instead of writing it all over again-I'm sharing this:
December 9th, 2015:
If I heard it once, I heard it a thousand times, "you've got to do something you can do for the rest of your life." That phrase depressed me once upon a time. It was depressing because my perspective on weight loss was always centered around feeling deprived, eating things I couldn't stand and white knuckling along on sheer will power. Who wants a life like that??? Forever?
I'd rather be morbidly obese and die young than lose weight at the price of being miserable for the rest of my life, I thought.
Discovering it didn't have to be a miserable experience, in fact, it could be quite enjoyable with the right perspective and practices, absolutely opened my eyes to the truest meaning of "...something you can do for the rest of your life."
It's about finding a groove that works well for you. If I felt deprived, forced myself to choke down undesirable things and essentially felt like a tightrope walker every single day, I wouldn't be here, today.
Finding that groove can be a very tough search. Valuable things I needed to grasp and embrace didn't become evident in my search until I regained 164 pounds of my initial 275-pound weight loss. Never give up is the big takeaway there. Through our greatest struggles, we find incredible opportunities to learn from and refine our approach. And it's all a part of finding the groove that works well.
I'm blessed and very grateful. When I express gratitude for where I am along this road, it includes being grateful for my relapse/regain period. It's strange really, because there was an avalanche of shame and guilt, a constantly crashing wave of negative energy during that time, and still, there's no doubt about its necessity for where I am today.
It certainly makes a wonderful case for letting go of guilt and shame and taking time to open our minds, shift our perspectives enough to find the light--and explore in search of the groove we hope and pray is everlasting.
My exploration continues. And it does without feeling deprived, without forcing myself to eat things I can't stand and with very little willpower.
Yes, very little willpower.
Willpower is resisting the urge to do something we really want to do. It doesn't take willpower to resist something we don't want. I don't want to go off the rails. What I do want in abundance is what my daily practices and disciplines bring--peace (spiritually, emotionally, mentally), calm, clarity, hope and joy--not to mention, good food and a freedom I once believed impossible for me.
It wasn't impossible for me. And it isn't impossible for you. I promise.
Is this a food plan with content, rhythm and a style of eating I can do forever? In my opinion, that's the most important question we must ask ourselves as we travel on this road.
It's all about developing the "You" Plan.
I felt horrible this morning. Nausea came over me--without fever. I cannot afford to get sick this time of year. I'm afraid my body had different plans today. I made it to my morning show and stayed at work until almost 11am--then left, made it home and grabbed some more rest. I feel much better tonight.
It's a great thing I felt better tonight, because this was the night Noah and I planned on "Ho Ho Lights!!" I wasn't canceling on my little man! That's what he calls them, "Ho Ho Lights." Christmas trees are "Ho Ho Trees." Now you know the language.
We have what's called "The Festival of Angels." You turn your lights off and creep along a lighted path super slowly. I allowed Noah to sit up front with me. I tried opening the moonroof and letting him stand with his head up and out-- like in a parade, but that was a little too much, he wasn't having it! It's too cold anyway.
Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget. I remained abstinent from refined sugar. I exceeded my daily water goal. And I stayed well connected with great support. And, I enjoyed some Noah time!
I'm still not feeling 100% as of this writing--but still no fever.
I'm scheduled for two different location broadcasts tomorrow--one from a grocery store and another from a frozen custard and steakburgers restaurant. It'll be fine.
Thank you for reading and your continued support,