Thursday, August 9, 2018

August 9th, 2018 One Of Them

August 9th, 2018 One Of Them

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I met my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with exceptional support.

I once again have a Fitbit activity tracker. Now, I'll have undeniable proof of my lacking exercise schedule. Wait--that's not a positive perspective, is it? Uh, I mean--now, I can get into tracking my workouts and this, I believe will inspire a more consistent schedule.

Incidentally, after taking forever to get it set up, including a call to their support line--which by the way is absolutely fantastic, then dinner, a store trip, and taking mom some things she needed, I didn't make it to the YMCA this evening. I don't need a Y visit to exercise, of course, but it just became too late. The 4:30am alarm comes way too soon. So--I'll take getting my Fitbit setup as tonight's win.

I bought a watermelon tonight. Always a gamble--and it paid off! It's a good one. It was tonight's dessert (see Tweet below).

Tonight's flashback goes all the way back to 2009, more than nine years ago. Everything was so brand new back then---and my positive visualizations were starting to happen with my dramatically smaller size. This DDWL Flashback takes us to the lake--on a SeaDoo for the first time.

Summer 2009:
I flew like a bird today across the top of the water on Lake Ponca. It was one of my greatest experiences. I had never viewed the lake from that perspective. I always stayed on the shore and watched other people zip across the water as I sat miserably in the sun wondering what they must feel like to experience such freedom.

I found out: They feel great. I was one of them today.

The owner of Team Radio had invited me to his private dock to ride his Sea-Doo jet ski no less than five times over the last month or so. Today I decided I would do it.

Doing things like this that were once nearly impossible is one of the quickest ways for me to get really emotional about how far I've come in the last 313 days. This is what it's all about. It's living, my friend. Really living. You know what I mean? Feeling that jet ski lift up and skimming across the water as the wind hurried through my hair was simply amazing. I felt like I could fly.

As I rode atop the surface I thought about how things have changed for me and continue to change. It would have been so easy to never have started on September 15th of last year. I did that my entire life. You know, think about starting, even plan to start, get excited about starting and then when the day would come (always a Monday for me), nothing but fear and giant overwhelming feelings of I can't, it's going to take too long, how am I going to do this under so much daily stress? It certainly wasn't that I didn't want it---Oh I did...but I was so busy trying to complicate the process, I couldn't get a handle on figuring out how to really do it.

I always claimed, “Oh, I know how to lose weight---just eat less and exercise more.” But there's more to it than that. Until I really analyzed the psychological part of the equation, I couldn't solve the problem no matter how bad I wanted it.

This time is certainly like no other for me. It's the real deal, my friend. The way out was found because I completely surrendered the dishonesty within, the excuses, and the rationalizations that always gave me reasons to fail.

I decided to give this mission the importance level it deserves so it wouldn't be easy to rationalize bad choices---because it's just too important.

And here I am 313 days later, flying across the top of a lake, viewing a perspective reserved only for those who choose to live.


Today's Featured Tweet:


Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

No comments:

Post a Comment

I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment. Thank you for your support!






Copyright © 2008-2018 Sean A. Anderson

The Daily Diary of a Winning Loser. All rights reserved.