Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Day 346 Don't Sleep and Write and Bend Without Breaking

Day 346

Don't Sleep and Write and Bend Without Breaking

OK. This isn't really where this post began. It really started last night after several hours of severe weather coverage at the radio station. It started with “when I was a kid...” Oh boy, nothing can get me started like “when I was a kid...” The problem? I was half asleep. I never really know what will inspire me to write, where I'm going with something until I'm already on my way. I have a hard time saying “I'm just going to do a quick post!” If inspiration hits, I can't help it. Unless I'm falling asleep and struggling to intertwine two wonderful points about determination, focus, and simplifying this wonderful road we're on. I was getting somewhere, but was just too tired to pull it all together. I was sound asleep by the first line of the third paragraph. I hit the wall. Waking up and finishing the post, forget about making it make sense, was not happening. It's 5:40am now. I'm headed to the studio for the morning show. Here's my half-asleep attempt at making some profound points:

When I was a kid I use to dream of being a meteorologist. I was completely fascinated by weather and the television weather coverage on stormy Oklahoma days and nights. I was born and raised right in the middle of tornado alley. One of my most vivid childhood memories happened at four years old. It involved my grandparents, mom, and aunt all jumping in the car in the middle of a hail storm with the tornado sirens blasting. A vehicle is the last place you really want to be during a tornado warning, but we were headed for shelter with screams and tears and my grandpa instructing “everybody shut up and calm down.” If he was scared, he certainly didn't show it. He was a man that served in World War Two on a battleship in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. He had to live and survive kamikaze pilots and fierce close range gun battles. It was going to take more than a tornado to shake him. Nothing was going to stop him from getting his family to a proper shelter. He was completely focused. This memory was burned in my brain at four and led to a healthy fascination with weather. In my pre-teen years I read every book on tornadoes and hail stones, I was completely hooked. Then at around the age of 13, somebody told me that becoming a meteorologist was really hard and involved a bunch of super complicated math. Hard? Really? I was immediately deflated and heart broken. I hated math, always struggled with it, feared it really. If math was standing in the way of my dream career as a TV meteorologist, I'd pick something else to obsess over. I immediately gave up that dream because somebody told me it was hard to accomplish. And I completely believed it.

My entire life I've heard that losing weight was hard. Often times the thought of it being so hard would leave me heartbroken and deflated, completely hopeless. I believed it. Many people believe it. Losing weight is hard, everybody says it, it must be true! Whenever something became hard to do, I would simply not do it anymore. It was much easier to pretend like I didn't care and eat whatever and how much ever I wanted. Finally the day came in my life when I had to face my weight problem or give up and let it eventually kill me and my family. I had to get focused. I had to get us to shelter. I had to change the way I thought about losing weight. 346 days ago I knew that I had to get over this perception of losing weight being hard. I had to simplify the process. I had to make it easy. I had to believe it could be easy. If I made it complicated, we were doomed.

Eating less and exercising more would drop the weight, but I had done that before and gained it all back. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Yep, totally gone. Isn't that cute? Could you see where I was so desperately trying to go with all that?

I'll give you the quick rundown for Wednesday: Courtney had to go to the doctor last evening with flu-like symptoms. Irene took her as I went back to work for weather coverage. It completely changed our dinner plans, our workout plans, and my blog reading and writing plans. But sometimes we have to adjust on the fly. We have to be flexible enough to bend without breaking.

Courtney is going to be alright. She's on antibiotics and bed rest. It's not swine flu, although she had all the signs! Thank goodness!

I'm sure we'll get back to normal of some sort today. I certainly hope so. Goodnight, or uh...Good morning and...

Good Choices,
Sean

Photobucket
My grandpa during World War Two

18 comments:

  1. Wow...who knew we had so much in common? I also wanted to be a meteorologist, and the math also scared me away from it! Of course, I wouldn't change anything about the wife and Mom I became, but it does cross my mind every now and again, especially during hurricane season.
    So glad that Courtney is going to be okay, and that it wasn't swine flu! How scary!
    Here's to you getting some rest soon!

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  2. "We have to be flexible enough to bend without breaking."

    Love it!

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  3. I love the coorelation you were TRYING to make before you zonked out, lol. You really should make more time for sleep hottie. Try harder, ok? I'm very pleased to hear that Courtney's going to be ok....sending prayers her way that she feels better very soon. :)

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  4. Glad to hear Courtney is okay.

    As for not making sense, many times I do that when fully awake...I go back and read my post and wonder what I was trying to say!

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  5. Tell Courtney i hope she's feel better asap!! At least you started writing out what you were thinking, me i usually have a great idea for a post as i'm falling asleep i then promptly forget what is was :)

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  6. Wow! I really think you look like your Grandpa, Sean! You should find that hat an put it on, strike the pose, and do that "morphing" thing you do. I think I remember seeing his picture on a prior post, and never noticed the resemeblance. Hmmm, guess who has changed!! Ya'll stay healthy! Get some sleep, buddy. Storm season isn't over yet! And we count on you as kind of our "local" meteorologist to keep us warned and safe!
    Blessings, Sara

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  7. I was a college prep art major with good grades when, at around 14 yrs old, a grumpy math teacher convinced me I was not bright enough to go to college. I believed the adult...and never went to college. What a crime that we both believed those negative reports!

    You changed your perception about how you would handle losing weight, and it BECAME easier...I appreciate you sharing your thoughts on this, they always make me think! I think it really IS hard at the beginnng, until we get our thinking straightened out, change our perceptions, and the road gets smoother.
    Thank you, Loretta

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  8. Yep, I agree that you look like your grandpa. Glad Courney is doing ok and it wasn't the swine flu. Hope you get some rest.

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  9. You grew up wanting to be a weatherman? That explains a lot...

    Actually, it doesn't explain anything, but I love to stroke my chin and say "That explains a lot" whenever I read or hear something that I don't quite understand.

    Carry on....

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  10. Weathermen use math? But they are always wrong.

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  11. Were you trying to say that oftentimes we think something is harder than it actually is? That sometimes the brain is the thing that gets in the way of achieving our goals.

    You better get some shut-eye or your next post is just going to be a title and we have to fill in the rest, lol!

    Glad Courtney hasn't got Swine Flu and is on the mend too!

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  12. Hi Sean,

    I think the "to hard" thing is iteresting, I was told by my grade 12 teach I would never be anything and that there was no way I would ever become a primary school teacher, it was "to hard" for someone lazy at academics like you. (I was over the 100kilos when I was 15) so lazy wasnt just on the acedemic side.

    So when I turned 20 my current employer said, " You are too godo to work here for the rest of your life what do you want to do ?"
    He was dumb founded when i told him and the back ground and he said.. It is only as hard as you make it, 2 years later this amamzing man passed away and the last thing he siad to me was, " it is only as hard as you make it, get what you want from life."

    So I have taken life by the horns on two occasions the first to get what I wanted career wise, the second to be able to live the life I want and be the role model I want and to be "normal".

    It is only as hard as you make it.

    Vic

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  13. buddy,

    If you believe its hard it becomes hard, but you have shown that it can be done simple and the old fashioned way. Ive always knew you could and wanted it so bad, just so thankful that you decided that you can and that it is easy with the focus, the right mind set,the changing of habits and determentation...you have come so far and I am so very proud of you. You have taken your life by the horns and
    have inspired so many to do the same, I know there is no turning back for you now you are places that you have never been since highschool and the face that I see looking back at me (which I love soooo much) I have never seen. You are a blessing to many and what you have to say if they will listen will change their lives in so many ways and they will never be the same.

    Love you always,
    Irene

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  14. Hi Sean,
    I think your grandfather sounds fascinating. The imagery from your reminiscing is wonderful. Wizard of Oz-esque :)... Too bad you didn't focus more on his lesson that night instead of the storm. I don't think you would've been afraid of the math demons...Though I am terrified too. Gave up on a Geology degree because of the "science" fears...
    (Weight loss) Battles create funny, empathetic, engaging, strong, beautiful people, whether they win or not. You. You know.
    Best to your lovely family.
    Andrea

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  15. Hello again!
    I was inspired by this post and wrote a post of my own with a link to you of course...
    http://crownology.blogspot.com/2009/08/look.html
    Thank you,
    Andrea

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  16. Thank you for that personal glimpse. I could see you in the car, at 4 years old! It sounds like you still have an attraction to storms and weather conditions. You know - I know you have a lot going on right now with your health plan, but..... you could go back to school and take classes in that area.. it's not too hard, and it's never too late. You are clearly an intellegent person, and even with the math thing (I share the whole number aversion as well) you could find a way to get your head around it. There are a billion dollars worth of psychiatrists and medical doctors who can not beat the health problems you have triumphed over - so don't sell youself short. My heart goes out to you with that crazy work schedule - and how hard it is. Your talk about covering the night shift at the station took me back in time. I studied audio visual production in college like a million years ago - so long ago, we used turntables (yes, vinal) and our spots and promos were on things we called "carts" - that looked like 8 track tapes. Anyway I interned at the local top 40 station- if a storm hit during our show we HAD to stay until someone else came in, or the snow plows made it out! So, I spent a few very sleepy nights talking about the values of The Cars, and Ric Ocasic.... LOL. I remember being totally impressed with this one DJ who mastered the art of putting on a really loooong Pink Floyd song, and leaving the booth, to head to the rest room, stopped in the break room to grab a sandwhich, and made it back just in time for the outcue... pure magic!
    Thanks for making me think about those old days. Keep up the good fight Sean !

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  17. That is too funny...

    Shame shame (shaking my finger at you.) You aren't getting enough rest. Maybe next week, huh?

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  18. WOW, you have done amazing things, congratulations on your success so far!

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