Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Day 477 I Will Not Tolerate The Wrong Direction and I Will Not Smoke

Day 477

I Will Not Tolerate The Wrong Direction and I Will Not Smoke

I'm happy to report that I've never made it this long before without nicotine. I'm fighting it with everything I have, it's not going to win. Not now, not after all the progress we've made. I'm working hard to keep myself busy or asleep.

I battled the cravings this afternoon by simply going to bed. It's easy when you're unconscious. I woke up from my horribly long nap and immediately called a friend. I read today that it's a great idea to call someone when you're having a craving. I did, I called four different people tonight! I'm getting this, I'm going to make it.

As much as I would like to report that this hasn't effected my food intake, it has. I haven't broken the bank, but I've used my calories today in a very loose way. I'm normally somewhere around 700 to 800 calories by early evening. When I laid down at 4pm for a nap---I was at 1100. It made for a very interesting dinner. I had some soup for 200 and Irene brought me a 150 calorie soft serve from McDonalds. It wasn't an easy night, but it was what I made it. I chose to short myself later by eating more earlier. I was comfortably at 750 when I decided that a chicken taco and a few chips and salsa sounded good.

I refuse to believe that gaining weight is inevitable when quitting cigarettes. A friend who quit several years ago told me that regardless of what I do, I might experience a weight gain---because my metabolism will be altered. No, not going to let this happen. I'll get crazy driven real fast---I refuse to go in the wrong direction. I'm going down and I'm going to do it without smokes. I've never been extreme, not in all 477 days. You know me, I'm laid back and easy---keeping it simple and straight, but if I see a weight gain---I'll get extreme on me real fast.

Amber turned 20 today. We're hoping to see her later in the week and celebrate. We all called and talked several times today. She's getting ready to go back to class on Wednesday. No longer a teenager, wow...I feel so much older than my 38 years. Happy birthday Amber!

I certainly don't mean to turn this into a stop smoking blog, it isn't---this is and will always be a blog about losing weight naturally. But pardon me right now, I'm consumed with this crazy fight. So naturally it's flowing out of my brain and onto my keyboard tonight.

Weigh day is Wednesday. I hope to drop into the 260's for the first time since...wow, I don't know---early teens maybe? It'll be nice I'm sure.

I found some wonderful forums on become an ex dot org. I found several people sharing thoughts, my thoughts exactly, and that helped. A bunch of people are going through this battle right now, I'm not alone---that's for sure.

Thanks for reading. And the picture of me with the last smoke---it just disgust me. i can't imagine anyone wanting to see this nasty picture, but a friend and regular reader asked me where it was, they wanted to see it---I'll post it soon. I just don't like it. I was so ashamed, I couldn't even look at the camera. My eyes are closed as if I'm saying---just snap the thing and let's move on! I'll post it tomorrow night. I'm going back to bed now. Goodnight and...

Good Choices,


  1. just keep moving forward bud.
    don't forget the sugarless gum...
    not nice with the thin mints and ice cream.
    Have a great night sean.
    and remember.
    you've made quite a few.

  2. I just want you to know that I'm inspired by what you're doing. I like reading your posts, especially because I am feeling pretty weak these days, and your endurance and strength are uplifting. You will beat the cigs too. Good luck with Day 478!


  3. Of course you can beat any possible metabolic downturn, but working on your muscles (which I think you are doing already).

    You are doing great!

  4. Oh, and happy birthday to Amber!

  5. You can do this! Look how far you have come. I think if you need to type about smoking on your blog go for it. This is where YOU write for YOU to get it out. You may end up helping other people that want to quite smoking as well!! Good Luck

  6. I LOVE the idea of calling people to distract you. I wonder if that works for food cravings? I might try it (even though I seriously hate phones).

    I don't know what this reminds me of but it made me laugh, and my dogs just looked at me like I'm crazy, lol; "I'll get extreme on me real fast."

    Stop apologizing about writing about writing about quiting smoking in addition to your weight loss. Do you know how valuable that information is?? Most of the obese people I know smoke, and most of their excuses for not quiting are, "If I quit smoking I'll gain more weight." Really guys? Really!? Next time they say that I'm going to direct them to your blog!

    Have a great day, keep up the good work Sean!

  7. Sean..here's my 2 cents worth: Smoking is a habit. In order to make this work, it needs to be replaced by another habit. A friend of mine quit smoking but took up drinking water and exercising. Everytime she had the craving, she would drink a tall glass of water (talk about getting your water requirement in for the day).. and if it lingered longer than that water, she would start exercising (going for a walk is great for breathing in fresh air).

    I'm not sure how long it takes to break a habit, but if you replace it with another..half the battle has been won.

    Wait until you really start tasting your food - 'cuz we all know smoking alters your taste buds!!

    Have a great day!

  8. Sorry I’ve been away for the last couple of weeks! The busy holiday season made it next to impossible to find the time to do any blog reading, but I am catching up now! I am so happy to see that you have been doing so well with your exercise again. I know that you seemed to be having a difficult time getting in much activity closer to the beginning of December. As far as what to call the ‘crossing point’, or the point at which you have lost more than you weigh, I would suggest ‘The Halving” or, perhaps, “The Divide”. If you wanted to give it an ironic and humourous name, you could call it “The Forking Moment”. Abbreviations are another way to go; you might want to try something like the Happy Affirmation of a Life Fulfilled (H.A.L.F.). Great job on your last weigh-in, by the way, and on putting so much effort into quitting smoking! The nicotine addiction (and the social / anti-social aspects that accompany it) is a tough one to give up; I have been quit for two years and I swear there is still the occasional day where I would cut off my right arm for just one drag. You will do it though, Sean! Have faith and stay strong and wish Amber a happy birthday for me!

  9. Sean, you're doing great!

    One day at a time. Just focus on getting through today, and if you have to , one hour at a time. I'm not going ot say you can do this. .... I'm going to say you WILL do this.


  10. Power through it, you can do it!

  11. I love the UNCONSCIOUS COMMENT! LOL.....

  12. I have only recently started reading your blog, it will take me a while to catch up! You're doing great! My hubby quit smoking about 6 years ago after smoking for about 20 years. It was a rough road for him, he had tried and quit many times prior. He told me that one thing that helped him get through it was the knowledge that he'd always have cravings but it would get better with time. He went to a smoking cessation class during that time and learned about all of the toxins that are in cigarettes, etc. I know at least 4 other people who quit smoking within this past year, all of them had been smoking for over 30 years. They were all people I thought would never even think of giving it up. Hang in there, it really will get easier for you. Now if I can just get my head on as strait as you have yours on and can tackle this weight.....

  13. I'm approaching my 4 year quit anniversary - after having smoked for 30 years. I did not gain weight, as I worked hard not to, so it is not inevitable. Good on you for quitting.

    Having a plan in place to deal with the cravings is half the battle. My plan involved planting pansies. If the craving was too bad, I would get in my car and drive to a place that sold pansies and I would buy a six-pack of pansies. I would come home and plant them. If I was still craving after that, I would repeat the process. I managed to quit smoking and had a beautiful yard to boot! The point is - have a plan in place so you know what to do when it gets tough.

    You rock!

  14. Cheering you on Sean. I'm so proud!!

  15. I wish you the best of luck at winning this battle with the cigarettes. You've got tremendous willpower and motivation, so that's a great start.

    On a different note, and this is just a personal observation - I think 1500 calories for your weight is kind of low considering your BMR is well above 2000.

  16. Hi Sean. You are doing a great job! I really admire how you are fighting this.

    A thought - losing weight and stopping smoking are primarily about health of course, but just as people need NSVs with losing weight to spur them on, how about everytime you would have bought a packet of cigs put the money in a large clear jar or vase (so you can see it all the time). Empty it at the end of the first month and put the money in a separate bank account and do the same every month. I don't know how much you will have in there after say 6 months or a year (not knowing the price of cigs in your country or how many a day you USED to smoke) but I'm sure there'll be enough for a great treat or two. Or maybe something important and significant, who knows? Decide on something special to do with it and then you are working towards that as well as a healthy long life!

    Keep going!

    Bearfriend xx

  17. I have been known to just go to bed when food cravings get to be too strong - good idea! It will get easier. You will win this battle. Cheering you on... Trish

  18. Sean - I was once a social smoker and could take or leave cigarettes at will, but I DO understand the craving you have.

    One thought that helped me to break the habit for good was this:

    I willingly wear my seat belt to save my life in the case of an accident. If my life is that valuable, then stopping smoking is just as important. Hopefully this thought will help you through a craving or two.

  19. Sean,
    I'll be crossing my fingers for you! Just think about how great you will feel (once the cravings are gone) to be smoke free. What a HUGE step in getting healthy. You can do it!

  20. Good for you... And the comment about it's easier when you are unconscious made me laugh but it's also so true, on so many levels.

    Keep up the fight.

  21. Never smoked, but I have the same addiction to the Chinese Buffet. That General Tso's chicken is insane.
    Keep fighting the good fight.

  22. I BELIEVE IN YOU !!!!!


    If you can lose weight while you HAVE to eat to live ....then you can so stop smoking, cause that is something you dont have to do to live.

    Keep going ..... i have heard of ppl who have stopped smoking and not put weight on, so it ccamn be don

  23. You are doing a great favour for yourself and your family and friends. Working on getting even healthier and fitter, on amazing wonderful guy.

    Love What You Do Sean, you are such an inspiration.


  24. Birthday wishes to Amber, twenty is such a great age, pity we don't know it when we are twenty..LOL



  25. Wow what an inspiration!! Losing so much weight AND quit smoking all at the same time, they ought to make an inspirational book about you!!

    I was wondering if along with your caloric cuts you were doing anything supplimental vitamin-wise to speed up the metabolism?

    I only ask because I've recently gone on-board with a nutrition plan that was designed by a doctor who won the Nobel Prize in nutrition and biochemistry for his work on this program and have had AMAZING results. I am actually on the weight maintenance/gain program because I'm a marathon runner and looking to add muscle mass, but I've spoken with a lot of people on the weight loss nutrition plan and they've lost some 100+ pounds and kept it off for 9+ years, and I was wondering what your take on take on cellular nutrition plans are vs. going at it the natural way?

    Anyways sorry to post this in a bit of a random spot!! I'd love to talk more with you on the nutrition front of what your doing and get your opinions! Shoot me an email anytime at AlexiDouvas@gmail.com!!

    Wishing you a happy and healthy new years!!

  26. Hello fellow OKIE! Thanks for the praise. I can't believe you are trying to quit smoking- that is amazing. Keep it up! You look amazing, and you'll smell even better now. :)

    Alison Foster (Foster Fitness)

  27. You are doing a great job!!!

  28. Hi there, I saw your quote on Jack Sh*t Gettin' Fit about consistency and had to check out your blog. I am impressed with you techniques for avoiding smoking... keep up the good work!


I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment. Thank you for your support!

Copyright © 2008-2020 Sean A. Anderson

The Daily Diary of a Winning Loser. All rights reserved.