Saturday, September 30, 2017

September 30th, 2017 The Price

September 30th, 2017 The Price

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded today's water goal, and I stayed actively connected with good support.

The pillars of my plan held firm today! I'm grateful.

The event tonight was similar to last night's event, just bigger. I handled the announcements and music and had a little help from my grandson Noah!



















It's been a very active weekend so far! In the middle of all this, I occasionally pause and acknowledge the difference between my heaviest and today. The freedom a healthy body weight brings is worth every ounce of effort I extend toward my daily plan. A good support friend of mine quoted Thomas Jefferson today in reference to the reverence he applies to his daily plan, "The price of freedom is eternal vigilance." I couldn't agree more. Resetting each morning with an embrace of the plan that keeps me well and a vision of how I want the day to unfold, are key elements for me.

Tonight's event required me to plan what amounted to an "on the go" type late lunch (see tweet below), and afterwards, I had loadout of sound equipment plus about 30 minutes worth of things to get done at the studio before stopping at the store for a few things and heading home to prepare a late dinner. I don't mind a late one if I'm in a position to stay up a little later than normal.

If you're interested in joining the accountability and support groups I cofacilitate with Life Coach Kathleen and Jordan Burgess, now's the time to express your desire! The next session starts October 9th and 10th. Space is available on this small and powerful team! If you're remotely interested, email me directly and I'll answer your questions! transformation.road@gmail.com




















Today's Accountability Tweets:


























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Friday, September 29, 2017

September 29th, 2017 Worked Well

September 29th, 2017 Worked Well

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, had plenty of natural exercise, and stayed well connected to good support.

I did not expect today to be as long as it turned out. It ended up a 15.5-hour workday, 14 hours before coming home to prepare and eat dinner, then back to the studio for an hour and a half.

I emceed a family fun night at a local elementary school this evening. I've done this event for seven or eight years straight. It's one way our radio station partners with education in our community. It was fun! I grabbed a cold brew coffee with half & half and a Quest refined sugar-free protein bar on the way to the event to simply hold me until a late dinner at home--and it worked well.



















I'm scheduled to do the same for another school tomorrow night.

I planned to spend a little time writing tonight. Instead, I must get to bed quickly before I fall asleep at this desk! It's late!

Today's Accountability Tweets:




























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Thursday, September 28, 2017

September 28th, 2017 Hold Those Thoughts

September 28th, 2017 Hold Those Thoughts

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed connected with good support.

I ran out of time tonight. Had a few things to write about--but I'll hold those thoughts until tomorrow night's edition.

Today's Accountability Tweets:


























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Wednesday, September 27, 2017

September 27th, 2017 Join Us

September 27th, 2017 Join Us

The next session of the accountability and support groups I cofacilitate starts October 9th! If you're ready to discover what it's all about, email me with questions: transformation.road@gmail.com
All members are a part of a "secret" Facebook group where daily accountability and support interactions take place. Also, spot support via text/call is part of the deal! I'd love you to join us!





























Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, i remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, I enjoyed a great workout at the Y, and I stayed well connected with solid support.

I stopped by mom's after the Y tonight. She's doing well! While I was on the elliptical, she was walking laps around the halls where she lives. When I think about her condition upon entering that place, I realize, her progress is nothing short of miraculous.

Today's Accountability Tweets:






























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Tuesday, September 26, 2017

September 26th, 2017 Peace And Balance

September 26th, 2017 Peace And Balance

My friend Jon Ludke was featured today on Spark People! Here's a link to the article:
Jon's Article on Spark People.

Jon's amazing dedication and commitment to the "non-negotiable" elements of his plan have transformed his perspective and consequently, his body. I'm incredibly thrilled for Jon, and I hope his story continues to inspire for many years to come!

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

I work my plan each day. It works because I do the work. I do the work because I know how quickly and easily it can slip away. I do the work because I deserve this kind of care. I do the work because I know, as a first class food addict and emotional/compulsive overeater--each on-plan day depends on my willingness to do the work. Will I ever go back? I hope and pray not, but it's possible if I release this level of reverence I apply to my plan each day. And I'm not sure "work" is the right word. It doesn't feel like work at this point. It's just what I do.

Sometimes, especially if you're new to these pages and you haven't dived into the deep end of the archives, it might look routine, simple, and somehow immune to any semblance of the struggle. But don't believe that for a minute!  I've been in deep dark places along this road and I'm perfectly capable of going back to those places.

The following is an excerpt written near the height of my 164-pound relapse/regain period.
DDWL Flashback-January 2014:

It wasn't that long ago when I wondered if it was even remotely possible to feel this way again. I was at the point of completely giving up. Struggling harder than I ever imagined possible, isolating in a place full of shame, guilt and regret...filling up on self-pity, self-loathing and a general disgust--completely choosing a perspective void of even a shred of hope. And still occasionally trying to get it together only to fall again and again. As the weight gain continued, old issues started resurfacing.

 I haven't shared this with anyone, but why not? A couple of months ago I sat on the edge of my bed and noticed a scab on my lower right leg. The weight gain had brought back swelling and since the skin on my lower right leg is forever damaged from my 500 pound days, it doesn't take much abuse for a tear to happen.  And there it was. The first sign of something horrific returning.  I'll never forget the pain of having a dozen or more sores after the constant swelling would rip my skin apart. I never want to get to that place ever again...but here it was, the start...and there I was feeling hopelessly doomed, almost attracted to the decline as if it had some insanely strong gravitational pull. What other freedoms will I lose?  How could this be happening?? Why????

 All kinds of questions pelted me during this decline: What did I learn while losing 275 pounds?  And why did the strength I felt back then feel a million miles away? It was like being fluent in a language and suddenly losing even the most basic elements of communication. Was I really going to work that hard, get to a healthy body weight, work through emotions and get to a place where I was healthier than ever...and then turn around and go the other way???  Did I somehow subconsciously decide I wasn't worthy?   

 Oooh... That's it, isn't it? I didn't deserve it. Okay, wow. That's heavy stuff. I wasn't worthy. How did I reach that ridiculous conclusion?

 I suppose it happens over time. It's like we have constant checks and balances happening with our perception of the good and the bad of our life. Every negatively perceived thing makes a mark, an impression, a scarring on our brain and then it sits and waits for other negative things to join in and these things grow.  Most of the time these negative perceptions aren't even our fault, but in a desperate effort to explain and understand, it becomes easier to just take the blame.  And maybe some aren't even bad, but compared to the standards and beliefs we hold, they're perceived that way.  And so it goes, our self-esteem, self-worth. And the other side, the positive happenings? They are wonderful, and they keep us going, but eventually, they're diminished by the overwhelming darker, more negative perceptions, a bad apple if you will, spoiling the bunch.

 As powerful as these dynamics seem, there's a serious problem. They're not true. I'm a good person, no--check that, I'm a great person. And I am worthy of feeling good. I am worthy of my success.

 I'm going to take care of me with the positive care and love I've always deserved but was too caught up in false negatives to fully recognize. I want it for others, so why not offer the same love and compassion for me to enjoy?

 This is a new day. This is a new perception. This is happening like no other time I've ever known.

 This is the moment when "I'm Choosing Change" becomes even more powerful.
---------------------------------------------------
Interesting to note: That was written in January 2014. To write something that felt so real to me that night--so empowering, made the next three and half months torture, as I struggled through another 35-40 pound gain. It wasn't until near the end of April 2014 when I finally set aside the denial and started making positive progress once again.

I'm immensely grateful to be here each day, in maintenance mode, and doing the "work" each day--not simply to maintain a healthy body weight, but to keep my peace and balance with food. Because if I take care of that each day, life and all its opportunities to live, open up. 

Today's Accountability Tweets:




























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Monday, September 25, 2017

September 25th, 2017 Next Session

September 25th, 2017 Next Session

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

The next session of the accountability & support groups I cofacilitate with Coach Kathleen and Jordan starts October 9th! If you've waited to join us, and you're interested--email me, transformation.road@gmail.com and I'll reply with registration instructions!





























Today's Accountability Tweets:




























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Sunday, September 24, 2017

September 24th, 2017 Sense Of Certainty

September 24th, 2017 Sense Of Certainty

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded today's water goal, and I stayed well connected with support.

Mom always enjoys our outings. We had a meal together and a nice ride around town.




















I spent quite a bit of time relaxing today. It was a day off and I made it that way! I really got into preparing an elaborate brunch (see tweets below) and that was fun. When I make the time to weigh and measure, and then log--it feels good, you know? It gives me a sense of certainty, which I suppose is the exact opposite of what I felt without a food plan.

Today's Accountability Tweets:






























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Saturday, September 23, 2017

September 23rd, 2017 In It

September 23rd, 2017 In It

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with good support.

Today started very early with location broadcasts from 9am to 3:30pm. I need my time in the morning--for my routine, before breakfast and getting ready for work, so--if I need to be somewhere by 9am, I need to be up no later than 7am. It made for a rather short night. I made sure I had what I needed and it was a good day.

One Year Ago Today on The DDWL:

September 23rd, 2016-
I'm not sure what happened today. Going in, it didn't appear like it would become so tightly packed. My schedule was almost down to the minute. I really must watch myself--and make sure I'm taking care of me on a day like today. I didn't do horrible today, but it wasn't perfect. It's never perfect!! Perfection isn't my aim. Consistency is my aim. 

 What wasn't so peachy about today? I waited too long between breakfast and lunch. Not a big deal, as long as it's the exception and not the rule. And under an elevated stress, I really should have reached out for support more throughout the day. These things might seem small and insignificant, but I assure you--the consequences of allowing inconsistency to creep into the routine of my daily disciplines, are the kind of consequences that can quickly put me at risk for an epic unraveling. Will days like this happen? Of course! Can I be better prepared to handle them? Yes.

 One of the things I look forward to each day is the privilege of reading some of the private writings of my friend and mentor, Gerri Helms. With her permission, I'm sharing a powerful excerpt from this morning's edition:

 "Diets are external solutions, intended to bring one to a healthy body weight. I tried a lot of external solutions, but unfortunately, I’m someone who had too much internal garbage to apply the bandage of a diet and enjoy what they promised. My internal debris was such that I’d return to compulsive overeating again, and again to get that sense of relief I craved. Food promised to deliver it, but it wasn’t a long-lasting fix. Within a very short time, I’d need more food, just to exist."

 Let that soak in a little more. Wow. Seeking external solutions for internal debris...the bandage of a diet... Thank you Gerri!

 She's good. She's really good.
-----------------
You're Elite. You're extraordinary! And the things you're making important each day are powerful.

The great thing about progress over perfection is- It's never compared or put up side by side to anyone or anything else. The bar- the expectations we set- the rules we make- the boundaries we set, these things aren't up for panel review or comparison- these things are yours and yours alone, and they'll evolve with your continued efforts.

These things you're doing are simply designed to give you positive progress toward your goals. Once we achieve our initial goals, a different perspective grounded in sustainability takes hold.

Few know or understand all of the "little things" that contribute to your success... and there are NO "little things." They're huge.

The thing is: Hard and fast without deeper explorations of the whys and hows, can sometimes deliver us to where we desire- but often, the challenge of maintaining a semblance of perfection leaves us exhausted and frustrated- and always feeling like it's not enough, or not good enough. Further, it creates a huge emotional and mental deficit once we "arrive," because, in the hard and fast, we're not exploring the deeper of what makes these shifts in perspective solid.

When we embrace structure and an individual plan that may not look perfect, or feel perfect- we're essentially putting ourselves in the best position to attain lasting and deeper transformation because suddenly what we once perceived as "failures," become our biggest assets- the biggest contributors to our monumental success... the best opportunities to learn... and grow along this road- and we do, because it's measured.

And it's our own individual trek- it's never comparable to anyone else, and if we allow our energy to focus on the day to day actions of our plan, rather than the "perception of perfection," magical things can happen.

And then, oh my- we can dream; envision incredible possibilities. At the end of the day, the results speak loudly... the proof and assurance you need, is in the positive progress you're making.

You've earned every "well done," along this road. You've faced and are still in the middle of exceptional and extraordinary challenges... and still, you're in it... you're doing what you can do when you can, and it is always good enough.

The plan evolves.

What you're able to do today is different than what you'll be capable of tomorrow- and so it goes... and where it leads is remarkable and inspiring.

You're elite even if your current temporary circumstance doesn't feel elite. You're still elite.

Goodnight!

Today's Accountability Tweets:


























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Friday, September 22, 2017

September 22nd, 2017 Starts Early

September 22nd, 2017 Starts Early

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with exceptional support contacts.

Friday night Tweets-only edition.

Work starts early in the morning with a full day of location broadcasts!

Today's Accountability Tweets:


























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Thursday, September 21, 2017

September 21st, 2017 Capable

September 21st, 2017 Capable

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded today's water goal, and I stayed connected with support.

Today was one of those rare days with weekday afternoon location broadcasts. I had a big lunch in order to hold me until a later dinner because I was hell-bent on getting a short nap as soon as I made it home late afternoon. This was not the best decision, at all. I was out for too long. Prepared a late dinner and now, as a consequence, I'm up too late. Silver lining--I'll have a regular workday tomorrow.

This trek is far from perfect, that's for certain! And my personal plan, as much as it's working well in the food department, needs some improvements--clearly. It'll never be perfect and that's a relief.

However, I'm honest enough with myself to know I'm capable of better.

But I'm good at the moment--I have plenty of blessings and lots of gratitude.

I stopped by mom's this evening for a nice visit. She was out walking laps around the halls of the facility. She's doing very well!

Today's Accountability Tweets:




























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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Wednesday, September 20, 2017

September 20th, 2017 Late

September 20th, 2017 Late

Today: I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed connected with support.

Late night!

I'm letting the Tweets tell the tale tonight.

Today's Accountability Tweets:
























Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean
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