Sunday, June 19, 2016

June 19th, 2016 Something We Practice

June 19th, 2016 Something We Practice

No alarm on my Father's Day morning was a perfect way to start a wonderful day.
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Amber treated me to a Father's Day lunch followed by a trip back to her house for gifts. We also watched a good documentary. My youngest daughter has been working so much lately, she wasn't able to make it over (she lives in another town), but she wished me a happy father's day, too. The love of my two daughters is the greatest. I'm blessed and immensely grateful.

I'm getting to bed a little later than I wanted. But much earlier than not too long ago. I'm truly improving!

I maintained the integrity of my maintenance calorie budget, I remained abstinent from refined sugar, I tried something new in the kitchen, I engaged in a few support exchanges, I exceeded my daily water goal and I worked out on the elliptical at the gym.

Today was great. When it's like this, everything is easier to navigate. Staying connected in support--even on great days, is critically important, because it makes it easier when things get tough. I found an excerpt from January 15th's blog post where it wasn't such a good day. I like some of the thoughts in this--so I decided to republish, in case you missed it the first time:

From January 15, 2016--

The Live-Tweet feed shows the food/water/exercise of my fundamental elements stream, but it doesn't show the most important parts of the fundamental elements. It doesn't show the short meditation or the prayer and it doesn't show the support call and support text messages that play an important role always, especially on a day like today.

My life stream was giving me its best today. And by best, I mean not so good sides. I was challenged with high stress in a few different areas. When the stress level goes up, I get emotional--add being tired to the mix, and it makes for a very unpleasant experience. Instability was at every turn today.

And I know food doesn't fix these things. It can't. That's not food's job. But those thoughts creep into my head just like always. I know it's critical when I start assessing the potential damage of an all out crash and burn. 

Isn't that interesting? Even though it's not a feeling, it's indeed a fact that crashing and burning, landing face first in a binge, wouldn't solve or make better one single thing...and further--even though I'm experienced enough along this road to know full well that not only is excess food incapable of helping me--only distracting me, it actually will do the opposite of help. And the depth of damage mentally and emotionally--not to mention bio-chemically, is potentially staggering. I still flirt with those thoughts. Maybe interesting isn't the word. More like scary or sobering. If you think this is a flare of over-dramatics, think about this...

My 164 pound regain started with a single binge. 

I've said it time and time again--and I will write it time and time again, none of us--not me, not you--not a single one of us is immune from relapse/regain. Not a single one of us ever has this "figured out." This isn't something "we got." 

It is only something we practice.

In this application, practice doesn't make perfect. I don't believe in perfect. I've often said, striving for perfection is the quickest detour to disappointment. It's a practice that elevates awareness each day. Our awareness can give us pause in critical situations. And in that pause we decide which way to turn.

I was looking the other way for a few. Yeah--I remember those streets of carelessness. And sometimes the most attractive thing isn't the food, it's the carelessness--it's the allure of "I don't care anymore." But I know I do care. And really, if you're caving to that allure, make darn sure you really don't care, or the mental and emotional consequences are super rough. I do care. A lot.

I turned in the right direction today. Thank God.

Continuous Live-Tweet Stream:










































Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

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