I'll often write a post and then, after it's settled in my brain, I think of something I really wanted to add. Often this thought comes as I'm drifting off to dreamland. If I acted on it every time, I'd never sleep. So I let it be, knowing another post will be written within 24 hours and I'll have an opportunity to express myself again.
In working toward answering the "what ifs" in yesterday's post, it's important to note that it isn't enough to untangle and understand their origin, then apply the actions needed to get the answer. It's something that takes an ongoing practice, a daily meditation of belief that remains strong, only because we keep it watered.
Also, unlike several years ago, I don't proclaim "I got" anything, other than today. And today I have the opportunity to hold the elements of my recovery sacred once again. Today I have the opportunity to apply an imperative importance level of the highest order to my abstinence from sugar and overall "food sobriety" (no refined sugar-no binges-maintain the integrity of my plan). If I take each day and make these things non-negotiable, then I have the best chance at continued successful recovery heading into maintenance mode.
If ever I decide to not do these things, I will, at first gradually--then quickly, return from where I came. That's a pretty scary thought. But for me and my normal, it isn't a maybe, it's a fact.
If this level of reverence is required for my long term success, it's up to me to design and shape my plan into something I can truly enjoy the rest of my life. This isn't a temporary means to an end. It's for life.
If I'm ever compelled to "take a break and relax my fundamental elements," then I need to take a close look at what I'm doing and figure out why I feel the need to break away from it. If I'm customizing my trek forward with elements I truly enjoy, what's not to love? And why would I want to depart from these things I enjoy, considering the peace, calm and overall stability they provide?
I'm no longer resentful about needing to have this plan in the first place. The jealousy I once harbored for those who live at their healthiest weight without any major issues with food and weight gain, binge eating, stress and emotional eating--is a thing of the past. Their normal isn't mine.
And I have two choices: Spend my life trying to be someone else's normal. Or spend my life embracing mine and enjoying the freedom this choice provides. Does my normal require extra effort on my part in order to maintain a healthy body weight and all the benefits that go along with it? Yes, it most certainly does. Am I worth it? Yes, times a thousand.
I had a great day today. I took extra care in preparing and enjoying my food. And it was a very active day in support, exchanging many different support interactions with others--and that's always helpful to me.
My Tuesday night weight loss support group conference call with Life Coach Gerri was wonderful, too.
I enjoyed dinner after the conference call. My plan/goal to get my workout complete before the call didn't happen thanks to a gloriously wonderful nap. I made the decision to not rush across town after dinner, to the Y for my workout. I opted instead for a good walk close to my apartment. It was beautiful out tonight and the walk was very nice.
I'll do my best to have another great day tomorrow.
My Tweets Today:
Dark roast with sugar free hazelnut creamer (1 tblspn per cup). 2 cups. Good Tuesday morning! 60 cal. pic.twitter.com/jwN4RKZQQD— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 16, 2015
Big breakfast! Avocado omelet w/3 egg whts-1 whl egg & 97g avocado w/salt & pepper. Red grapes (177g), pear. 493 cal. pic.twitter.com/XQIScd3xo7— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 16, 2015
Lunch in MyFitnessPal... pic.twitter.com/Bi9YilscBB— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 16, 2015
Bean (130g) & Cheese (1 each: provolone-swiss) tostadas w/salsa, lettuce & lght sr crm (15g). Strwbrs (140g). 393 cal pic.twitter.com/NRAUYrICcf— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 16, 2015
Dark roast w/sugar free hazelnut creamer (1 tblspn per). 2 cups. One now, one later. :) #mygroove 60 cal. pic.twitter.com/EyiMEtgvyJ— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 16, 2015
Lamb chops (7oz total) topped with SF peach spread, red potatoes w/onion & peppers, garlic grn bns, asparagus. 511cal pic.twitter.com/fGOp3MgKpi— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 17, 2015
Extra dinner details: 200g red potatoes prepared w-1/2 tablespoon butter (50 cal). 3 seconds worth pure olive oil spray (27cal) for veggies.— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 17, 2015
Lacing up my kicks for a good, brisk walk. #walkingworks— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 17, 2015
Images from tonight's walk. pic.twitter.com/dG1ZDFf1Uf— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 17, 2015
Golden delicious apple, 1/2 Anjou pear & 80g red seedless grapes. 2 cup h2o refill= #watergoal #lastfoodofday 183 cal pic.twitter.com/CWplkb8BKJ— Sean Anderson (@SeanAAnderson) June 17, 2015
Thank you for reading and your continued support,